Dating Dave

Dry Spell

2006-08-30T23:41:00.000-05:00

Okayyyyy,...well things are finally starting to settle down.....by mid September I should be back in regular routine.....there is much news to share,..but more than I can here, right now,....but needless to say,..its all big.......just not on the love life front!
In fact I have all but gotten rid of all potnential dates and/or booty calls.....I need to focus ona few things right now,..so its better that I am single right now,..this is why I haven't been posting...nothing to say really......I did kind of accidentally mix it up with Mermaid and a new one we'll call "Press",..but it seems I blew both of them.....
Mermaid was kind of odd,..very hot,...very nice,..and we connected well email,..but hen I asked to call her she pretty much put me off....this is usually because they are married or they are involved....errr at least that has been my experience......finally I called Mermaid on the carpet and said,..look we have talked for a month via email...can I call you or not.....and she pretty much didn't answer me on this question.....yet I was still getting and sending EPIC emails,..that would have only been a 5 minute conversation but took me about 14 days to type.......anyway......I finally said,..."look....its time we talk,..if you don't like what is said or how I am fine at least we both know....if you do then we can go from there"....I got an email back that she still wasn't ready,..since she had just gotten out of a relationship and BLAH BLAH BLAH...to me it means NOT INTERESTED.......so I told her look,..just to prove I am a gentleman,..I have had your home phone for three weeks and have not called you.......(it was a simple trip to the white pages online to get it byt he way) WE had been emailing on regular email and NOT MySpace, her email contained her full name,..I looked it up.....so I told her this and she got mad,..really mad! Then asked how I had gotten it.....and I told her......I went out of town that weekend,..and when I came home I got the "WE shouldn't talk anymore and I deleted my MySpace account" WTF?
First,....my bad for telling her agreed!
But truth is, that that is exactly how I found out about Nascar and her hangups and divorce,..and Thatgirls restraining order...I mean lets face it,...I DO DO public records search on people I meet ont he net too,..and I recommend women do as well...but Mermaid was really put off by this apparently,..eventhjough I only did a simple white pages check....SEE I HATE DATING.......and it was no different then her and I meeting in a bar and I look up her phone number since I had her name and either forgot her number or couldn't remember it.....Oh well my guess is that she DID have soemthing to hide.....NASCAR did a paid full on background check on me.....I mean if empooyers can do it,..why shouldn't potential mates..I am not offended by it at all......but then I guess women are women and thus can get mad at whatever...and I didn't even do a background check on her I simply looked up her phone number and told her I did.....
Oh well.....

The new one Press and i hit it off and MySpace pretty quick and emailed back and forth over a week.....I called her...I apparently said something she didn't like or something.....now she is pretty much ignoring me...i have no idea what,..we talked for almost an hour.....both of these were accidental,..so I never expected anything to come of either and I am NOT on MYSpace for that,..but.....things happen.....oh well back to the drawing board again......

Either way things will settle down ina few weeks and I can get back into this dating game with more experience and more $$$.....plus I started a diet to get back in shape...all the meeting and late hours i have kept recently have taken their toll...ever since vegas....I have been eating at restarants and fast food...and that makes my ASS very fat...........soooo back into dating mode...slim trim,...and full wallet......seems to be the only way to meet women....okay thats all for now..I will post my normal stuff soon,..be patient,..there truly has been nothing to tell.....
DD

Snap Judgements

2006-08-23T15:43:00.000-05:00

From the UPI.........I will probably go to jail for copyright violations......but..............Whatever!

NewsTrack - Science
Study: We're hard-wired for snap judgments

PRINCETON, N.J., Aug. 22 (UPI) -- A U.S. psychologist says we might not be able to tell a book from its cover, but we can decide if a person is attractive in only a tenth of a second.

Princeton University psychologist Alex Todorov says people respond intuitively to faces so rapidly our minds may not have time to influence the reaction -- and our intuitions about attraction and trust are among those we form the fastest.

"The link between facial features and character may be tenuous at best, but that doesn't stop our minds from sizing other people up at a glance," said Todorov, an assistant professor of psychology. "We decide very quickly whether a person possesses many of the traits we feel are important, such as likability and competence, even though we have not exchanged a single word with them. It appears we are hard-wired to draw these inferences in a fast, unreflective way."

Todorov and co-author Janine Willis, a student researcher who graduated from Princeton in 2005, used timed experiments and found snap judgments on character are often formed with insufficient time for rational thought.

The research appears in the July issue of the journal Psychological Science.

The last paragraphs really hits home.....how much time is enough for rational thought???? Man I need a new watch!

;-)

DD

Sorry WAAAAAY TOOO BUSY!

2006-08-23T15:25:00.000-05:00

Okay sorry folks,...I have been getting hell for not updating,.....but I have a great excuse....First I stopped dating for the time being,...no choice,...no time.....ever since I began to move my life has been upside down,....I don't have the time or patience to deal witht he dating GAMES right now,...but of course,...being the fool I am will jump right back in head first as soon as the dust clears.....

Since my last post I have sold part of my business and brought on a partner,..so I have been dealing with all of those legalities and potential problems s well as reorganizing the company a bit....
Plus the move,....and taking care of family and friendly obligations....this has kept me more than busy and the potential prospects have dried up for the most part....

Mermaid has been deleted............I think after a month of daily emails it is not out of the question to ask to call....or have a phone conversation................anyone who thinks that carries too much weight ( a phone call that is) is probably married or in a relationship......oh well....more to the story,..but not worth the time.....no biggie..........

"IF" has popped back up but after the check in calls I have been getting from her it appears more to see if I am still interested while she goes and does whatever she goes and does.....really strange..........................

Thatgirl has been popping up over and over,.....at least we settled the whole crop of bullshit that stemmed from being in a relationship with her,..mostly her absolute craziness.....she may still be crazy,..but she ain't my crazy!!!!

Cubana,....had been emailing and calling me since her hubby left in June.....then when I probably needed her friendship and compassion the most,.....she became vacant.......so much for friends.....no big deal either,..she was looking for me,..not the other way around.....but then she just stopped calling...I texted her and said pretty much when she was down and out I was there and now that I need a little friendship and advice she was suddenly unavailable.......the next day I got an long email apology saying I was right and sorry and blah blah blah and that she would call me that night................a week went by and I got a text message on a Friday about going to a movie I ignored it........a week later I sent another text saying that its been great knowing her and good luck! She emailed me the next morning....."Hubby is back,...very sorry,........" WHAT THE FUCK EVER on that one too!

So those are the updates.....I am getting enough botty calls to keep me busy,..but no time for GF's right now......

In the meantime enjoy the next post pretty funny stuff! I'll be back in business in the next two months or so....the break has actually been very good for me!!!!

DD

Ok Booty Calls redux

2006-08-07T21:40:00.000-05:00

Alright crazy weekend......working on the Mermaid........more in common with her than most women I have met in the last three year combined...........ohhhhh except Cubana,....they are very similar actually.....bu things going nice and slow.......still have yet to speak on the phone limiting ourselve to email....but we are asking very personal questions and crusing through the get to know you phase.....kind of fun.............

The weekend,..well mark the return of Thatgirl,....she popped up again...........then and old flame as well......busy weekend,.....had two booty calls seperate........I know I know...WHORE (me that is) well I have been incredibly stressed out lately and this was a welcomed ego boost...I found my MOJO!!!! Good to go for a while......no dates not dating for a while thus the lul in action,..errr well for you readers.....but action been good for me for sure......AND don't have to date them.....perfect....Okay I will have a major post in a few days,..just thought I would catch up,..........lots of news coming soon..........
DD

Booty Calls....GOOD FOR THE SOUL

2006-07-26T15:26:00.000-05:00

Okay,.....so I haven't heard from "If" since last post.....errr wait one email. Then suddenly, Friday night as I was being stood up by my Booty Call (who called to say she had to work the next day and maybe tomorrow) I get a phone call from "If" AT 12:35 a.m. COOL......NEXT!
BUUUUuuuuuuuuutttttt,.......Since I was home alone and grilling out for one and am completely enjoying the new place,..I had some tunes on, some chicken on the grill, and was drinking like it was Friday night......by 12:35 I wasn't really worth much of a shit,.....but oh well she probably wasn't either.......................Well I didn't get booty called,..but she did come over and we hung out for a couple of hours......she called me again this week...so thus is dating,....Booty Calls are good for the soul.....and Saturday night I got the postponed aforementioned....."BACK ON THE HORSE!!" I SAY!!! Sooooooo,...still dating, still single,....still hoping "If" will come around and add a new player (ummm not the Booty Call),.....but a MySpace alien....We shall call her "Mermaid". She is very pretty, she is well employed, she is very funny, She is my age, no kids, wants kids,.....she also appears to be half involved in a long distance thing that is at the point of commit or get lost....................She emails me every day at least.......and has my number,......we will see what she does.....I think the ultimatum gets leveled to "Long Distance Boy" this week......
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm its all very friendly and funny right now......I'll let you know! I could be punching well above my weight with her.....naahhhhhhh David vs. Goliath, hmmmmmmmmm

E-dating or E-Stalking (you're not going to believe this!!)

2006-07-26T14:49:00.000-05:00

Some people need to stay single and certainly should be shown the way out of the gene pool by the life guards. There was a time when Darwin had it right,...the stupid and weak would kill themselves off and the strongest would survive. Unfortunately, it appears, that we allow too many stupid people to stay alive,..by helping them after they do something stupid, saving their lives after they do something stupid, dumbing down laws to allow them to be more stupid, and mostly allowing them to E-date......

Okay, sooooooo with that said. I was actually reading current events (since I am a war buff) and was on a blog reading about the current conflict in Lebanon. I was on a Jewish site, seeing what the Israelis were really trying to do (hopefully kick some terrorist ass,..but I digress). The Jews, Go love them, (err and he does apparently), can put war and life on the same page. I mean that is reading of the horrible things going on around them and to them,..they still E-date and try to live normal lives. I suspect that since theyhave been at war for their entire existence it is just a part of life to them. So I am reading about war and on the same site is a story about an E-date (From J-date,...a Jewish online dating site) and I actually shot Dr. Pepper out of my nose.....sooooooooooooooooooo I am going to post some of it and give you some details,..but I urge you to click the link to the read the whole thing.......They even have audio!!!

MAN THIS IS FUNNY!

So it goes like this...........

Guy goes on J-date looking for a mate (hey that rhymes,..look at me the poet!)
He sets up a pretty normal profile:

About me:

I joined JDate four weeks ago. Cute, tall and funny best describes me!
I am a person whom is usually on the go, particularly in the warm
weather. In the summertime you can typically find me on the beaches in the
Hampton's or New Jersey shore. In the wintertime I enjoy taking drives
to beautiful towns such as Lambertsville, Red Bank, Katonah, Port
Jefferson and Greenwich. "People watching" can be an easily enjoyable
activity for me. I own a management consulting firm assisting financial
institutions with regulatory issues. I travel extensively for business and
pleasure.

I am looking for:

I am on JDate to find someone special. I have no set rules per se on
dating someone younger/older (20-40). I have learned that age really does
not matter; so why limit any possibilities in finding a life long
partner. Wouldn't you agree? Physcial characteristics: Preferably tall and
medium build. Mentally: Fun and easy going. Someone who is comfortable
with themselves. I love a good jokester so please be funny!

Okay so pretty normal.............then he goes on with more details and so forth, typical of this genre of dating.

He gets a date:

So Darren asks Joanne out. Joanne accepts. They eat at China Grill. (Nice restaurant. I've been there.) Darren pays, despite Joanne offering to split the check.

At some point after the meal, Darren gets the idea that Joanne didn't like him.

Rather than just chalk it up to a bad date (hey, it happens, right?) Darren... Well, Darren has other plans.

DARREN EMAILS JOANNE ASKING HER TO SEND HIM $50 FOR HER PORTION OF DINNER.

Yes. I paused and re-read that about 30 times, too.

I couldn't be serious, could I? He actually didn't email that, did he? Oh, but he did:

Yeah he emails her.....I thought this was funny at first. It was not quite said what made "Paranoid Darren" think she didn't like him,...maybe she picked up a waiter while there. Maybe, just maybe,...she told him,...maybe he's just a jackass and most people don't like him and he just suspected,...so Ithought okay well,..that's pretty funny,.....but he was beyond serious.

This story is credited to a fellow blogger PRDifferently the full post is here: I have asked his permission and will remove it if he denies,..but this story is begging to be told.....

Well Darren sends this email:

From: Darren Sherman
Date: Jun 19, 2006 8:48 PM
Subject: Date
To: xxxxx@xxxxxx.com
:
Cc:

Sorry things didn't work out. I guess you changed your
mind.
Here is my address for the $50 bucks:
East Street, Apt. 504
NY NY 10028
Take care,
Darren

Then he gets no response....so what does a ballsy, single, psycho who feels jilted do??? Sends another email of course:

From: Darren Sherman
Date: Jun 20, 2006 8:13 AM
Subject: Darren
To: xxxxx@xxxxxx.com
:
Cc:

Joanne,

I wanted to follow up on my email and call to you last night to ensure you received my messages for the $50.

Please acknowledge by replying to this email that you will be sending me the $50.

I hope you understand from my point of view.

Thanks,
Darren

Okay go read the rest PRDifferently tells this story way better than I:
The dude even calls the place they ate and sends her his Amex bill.......don't miss this:

Thanks PRDifferently:
http://prdifferently.typepad.com/my_weblog/2006/07/how_not_to_act_.html

10 THINGS MEN KNOW FOR SURE ABOUT WOMEN

2006-07-12T22:13:00.000-05:00

The Top Ten Things Men Know "FOR SURE" About Women

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10. They have boobs.

"If" Date #3 and #4, The End

2006-07-11T11:10:00.000-05:00

Okay so I will wrap this up as this young lady didn't last long,..no need to go into great detail. it was typical of dating,..you win some you lose some,...and sometimes you can get some action either way...............
Date #3 was inpromptu, she called me on a Friday and we went to the same bar we ended up at last date to watch a band.....we had a great time,...but as the conversations went on I could tell she was really messed up by her last relationship.....I suspect she moved back home, because she was insecure,...and she may have also needed the protection................okay RED FLAG!!! WARNING: Intruder Alert! Intruder Alert! But my libido was in over drive and we ended up hanging all over each other anyway.................hey I can't help it,..I'm a man..............she was even buying the drinks.....................AAAAAHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I love it when I get to be the chick on the date,......I still bought a round or two,..but she was totally diggin me..................we had a great time and I took her home around 3. The apartment was being packed up and was filthy and she lived with her folks,................so I had no choice, but to take her to her house and say good night!! Damn the luck!
I probably had my best chance that night of getting in on the goods!.........But still int he back of my mind I started to notice the issues she was having and had! She had lost a series of points through the night with comments.....and actions.............but was gaining points with affection and some great kissing!!!! The issues were winning though.....

We agreed to go out again,..but she would not commit to two things I asked her about one 1 week away another 2 weeks away,....as suggested dating venues...........onme issue was that she was very wishy washy...back and forth on subjects and opinions.....she was all over the map................sometimes women are,..but this stuck out..............

Come Tuesday of the following week,...she had talked me into going to a concert.....I buy mine, she buys hers................I assumed that she wanted to go Dutch..................WRONGO! Ended up costing me $75 bucks at the bar,.....and she never once offered to buy her drinks,..I assumed we were ona date so this was no issue,..once I started paying for eveything barring her ticket,...but that was not the case...and she made it known....................I am a classic people observer and I should have known going into the place that she was there for show and not by me,..but using me.................DAMN I AM A SUCKER FOR THIS TACTIC...................See it goes like this: We were standing outside in the line to come in.................and she made an ominous but passing comment about seeing people she knows at this particular venue...........she didn't say who,....it was just "People"................but after going in I had shaken hands with several people I knew there and she had known no one thus far,....to me that meant it isn't really people we are looking for but perhaps 1 person...........maybe her ex,....or at least acquaintances of his. As we stood there watching the opening band,...I couldn't help but notice her constantly looking around......but then when I looked at her she looked at me.....we kissed a couple of little pecks through out the night,..but she was completely not being what had been typical of our dates thus far...............not even close.............she wanted to be there with me,...but not with me.....understand? After she kept looking around I asked her,..."who are you looking for"? I also didn't want to be blind sided if she found them or they her either............you know.....ex's can get jealous.....so this was a self preservation issue for me................anyway,..the mood between us began to deteriorate through out the night although concert was awesome.................Little was said on the way home,..so it was like she was disappointed in not finding whoever she was looking for...........

The day after next we talked on the phone and I asked her what was wrong,..and why did two nights before go bad,.....and she went into the diatribe about how come we can't just go hang out somewhere and not be on a date....honestly I had no idea what she was talking about except if we were dutch why wasn't she buying her own drinks...........and one minute she was being very sweet and the next was moody as hell,......knowing women as I do,...this is not SO unusual,..BUUUUUUUUUTTTTT....................

Well we got off the phone and I sent an email for her to see in the morning at work,...just backing off and telling her hey we have had three great dates and one so-so,....we'll chalk it up to experience..........I got no response,.....that night she called me and I had already committed a ticket to the race in Daytona the following Saturday night to her.....so this was Tuesday,...I had brought it up all weekend,..because I had other people to take,...she was excited about it........as was I. This was her "Tolerance Date",.............again she got all wishy washy when I asked point blank "ARE you going to the race with me?"...................she said she didn't know and would let me know the next day...................I was pissed because by now 4 days prior,..my friends on other potential race goers had already gottent their tickets and made their plans,..even Cubana........

Needless to say she backed out,...I hung up and that was that. Luckily I foubnd someone
to take so that I was not sitting next to an empty $80 seat for a race..........

HERE IS DATING IN A NUTSHELL.......................as I am typing this over 14 days since,.............guess who just called not 20 seconds ago??????????? Yep "IF" ! Funny how this whole thing works...................$20 says I see her in less than a week, and we start talking on the phone again................I still want the action.............so we wills ee what plays out............I don't see a future of getting involved,......but I see that she didn't forget about me and that I did leave an impression...........enough for her to call.......and just chat,..it was like we never missed a beat in conversation.......we are both conversationalists.....

Okay even more odd............... So I go to the race and I call Cubana the night before,..she says she is sitting on the back stretch and going with people from work....we joked about getting together at the race or hanging out for a little while,.....but I live 2+ hours north of the track and she lives,...about 20 minutes north....I left later than anticipated and she too,....she was parking and riding the shuttle,..I was parking in the rear lots.............with over 200,000 people attending the race, there would easily be 30,000 cars back here,....I pulled into the back lot #10................guess who was just getting out of her truck and was less than 5 spaces away???? Yep Cubana! What are the odds of that??? I am telling you people,...its really weird with her and I,....we were both wearing black tank tops and shorts........too............we took a picture together and had a few beers,..she went to hang with her people and I hung with mine........but we did run back and forth.........we have spoken and email or IM'd every day since..............

Okay new one on the Radar..... Straight from MySpace,..so she may be an alien,..but she is super pretty and very funny.............I emailed her out of the blue yesterday only person I have emailed in 3 months on Myspace,..not sure why,...but she replied last night,......Haven't decided her nickname,........so.......................

That's it for a while.....dating goes on,..................did I mention I hate dating?
DD

MOVED!!!!!!

2006-07-07T15:14:00.000-05:00

I am officially moved now. This is my 4th bachelor pad since I left the military in 1993. I have lived with two women; one for two years and one for 6, so these four places were either by myself or I had male roommates. After the last roommate (not a woman that I lived with) I have sworn off having them. As much as they help pay the bills they end up costing nearly as much in damage, lost sleep, annoyance, and everything and anything you can imagine,.....Now MAYBE just maybe this is why women divorce us, I have lived with men and I got along with most of them, but have certainly had drunk late night fistfights with at least one of them. I have a high tolerance since in the military you get stuck with whoever,..you learn courtesy and etiquette pretty quick. But mostly you learn tolerance!
I moved into this apartment as a fast way to get out of a bad situation with my long time girlfriend. We lived together 5 years and dated six,..but I think after year 3 we knew it was not going to be a marriage, at least anytime soon,...we were both very stubborn and hard headed,..but we had tons of fun and made enough money between us to do some very cool things. But there were huge underlying issues, eventually one of us had to go. It was completely monogamous to the end, so it wasn't anything like that,..it was the life things, to me very important,...like how to raise children, and finances, and things of the sort that we just couldn't get agreement enough on to marry. Part of me still misses her,..but quickly I still remember why I left. So I moved into a tiny apartment I could afford and was available,...all tough to find when you want to do it in 30 days or less.
I hate moving as you may know,...even more than dating,....so I stayed in that tiny ass apartment for three years,..but it was a total bachelor pad,.. too small to have much company. Two was a crowd with all of my furniture, if there was four people over, we almost had to rotate from the apartment to the patio, to back around to the front door, pushing the next person out...that sucked, because I like to entertain, football games, holidays, so forth. Now I am in a house more than three times the size of my apartment,.....so there will be some entertaining NOW!~
As I was packing up my bedroom, it dawned on me "What if I had actually notched my bed post while here?" How many notches would I have from this, my first post relationship bachelor pad???

First one was a girl who's name I can't remember, met at a bar, had fun at the bar, went to my place, had fun there, she left the next morning, never saw or heard from her again,..fine by me! So we'll call her "Rebound"
NC, nuff said she knows who she is. 3+ months.
Next was GILF, we dated for about 3 months.
Then came "Youngin" 2 months.
Then was a girl I had a total crush on in high school. She was a cheerleader and was uber hot!! Well she wasn't so hot now and much larger,....but I had had imaginary sex with her so many times while I was horny and 14-18 that even her adult weight and the thought of her kids couldn't stop me. MAN RULE: If she was a cheerleader in high school and you had a crush on her AND you have the chance to tag it later, it is perfectly ok to bag her now regardless of looks!!! You just won't tell anyone now! AND most men would agree! Two total booty calls,..and they were awesome!
Next was Thatgirl,...we broke furniture, dishes, my bed, all kinds of things.....6+ months.
Then there was Nascar,....she had a real chance to hang around,.....but went whacky on me. We spent most nights together at her house,..but there was a couple at the pad. 4 months.
Another no namer.......I think she was my bartender that night. One nighter.
Lastly was Cubana........it ain't over until the fat lady sings as the saying goes,...and the fat lady hasn't even shown up apparently.

So there it is,..my notches, a couple of relationships, a couple of one nighters, a couple of booty calls. There may even be one more I am forgetting,....I had to go back and insert two that I forgot about as I was writing....but we'll stick with this.....
9 women, 3 years! New pad now, and it looks awesome....ALL of my furniture is here, so no restrictions on being a bachelor and this being a bachelor pad......who will be the first??? Who knows, but you'll know right after I find out.......................
DD

MySpace Aliens

2006-07-07T14:32:00.000-05:00

Okay so I have had a MySpace account for about 5 months now. With all the press it gets for perverted old men picking up young girls I am afraid to tell anyone.....However it is serving its purpose well. I have reunited with three old friends, yes women my age! And, I have actually met three women that were worthy of a date, but have been too tied up to go out with two of them and the one I did go out with got me lucky, but then she went back to her ex......which leads me to this....THERE ARE SOME REAL FREAKS OUT THERE AND COMPUTERS MAKE THEM BOLD!!!!
Now am I possibly speaking of myself??? No, I don't need a computer to be a freak,...I just need a computer to tell everyone ;-)
It has actually turned into a research project and there is much that I am learning. Here are just some of the examples of what Dave has learned as an Astronaut in MySpace.

People give out WAAAAAY too much information about issues they have.
People desperately want to be accepted, so tell you why they are freaky so they can meet like minded freaks.
People who were not popular "horde" friends (because you can request to be someone's friend and once they accept you show up their page and they on yours) All of mine are actually friends, people that I talk to at least semi-regularly. But some people just collect them....for about three weeks I accepted any friend requests I got,..then I waited to see if they actually asked about anything a friend would ask,...most never even said hi beyond that,..so we became friends???? What for??? For them to feel popular that's why! Some people have 378 friends or 2,476 friends,....yeah right you weirdo!!!! So I delete them if they never say anything after they ask to be my friend. Its funny and I giggle, when I whisper "bad friend" and hit delete. So Lessons: THERE ARE LOTS OF INSECURE PEOPLE WHO WANT TO COLLECT FRIENDS! YET HAVE NO SKILLS TO MAINTAIN THEM.
That strippers who want you to watch their webcam (which you won't know about until you go to their page after they send you a nice email and it has a super hot picture with it)......I check out all the people who on these pages and all of the people they are "Friends" with, then I will go to that persons page to see what they are about friends and I think to myself...MEN ARE SUCKERS!!!! Were you Friends before she started stripping on a webcam??? Funny!!!
That there are a ton of lonely people out there, places like this NEED to be around
THAT THIS IS WAY TOO DANGEROUS FOR CHILDREN if not heavily supervised.
That people will out right lie for their own agenda and I mean more common than you can guess.....
That you can actually meet some interesting people and even get dates (which was not my mission, but has happened).
That it is super fun to play with HTML (Computer language that builds your page), you can do some really cool stuff.
Its vastly different from internet dating sites. But little different than meeting at a bar....go figure.
That just as in a bar women will get 400 emails and friend requests, but a man will get substantially less.
Men stalk women here too!
Women can be total freaks. AND stalk men too....yes! I have been stalked....
That women will rarely put "Serious Relationships, Dating" (one of five choice you have) even if that's exaclty what they ARE lookign for.
That people cheat massively on their spouses here and can also find swingers here, you can even search just for swingers....
That there are only two places, the Airport and Vegas that is better for watching people. If you know how to watch people on MySpace, as I described above, you'd be amazed at what you learn and see and read......GREAT STUFF.....too bad its not live!

These are just some of the lessons I have learned in this research and the quest for a permanent fixture.........its really entertaining to do this to say the least. I love being able to observe people patterns and patterns along the species.....its funny to watch people pretend to be what they really wish they were,...but there are alot of awesome people out there too. I have been lucky enough to meet some, so its a win win for me.....I am learning tons about dating and people....
did I mention I hate dating???
Probably did!
More to come
DD

DATE 2 IS HERE

2006-07-07T14:23:00.000-05:00

I had been working on the Date #2 post for about three weeks,....so it posted where I satrted it and not at the top. SO CLICK HERE TO READ DATE 2.

A Tolerance Date

2006-07-07T14:05:00.000-05:00

A "Tolerance Date" is a trick I learned a long time ago while in the military and it has served me well. I do it with every woman and often it is the make or break of a new relationship. The theory goes like this:
If you are dating someone and have gone out a couple of times and she has not committed the cardinal sins of dating yet,....1) emabrrassing you in front of her friends, your friends, or complete strangers because she turns out to be a total freak,..just add alcohol. (Now it is expected that this will happen sometime,..but not before the "Tolerance Date" 2) If you can stand her company for long periods of time....i.e., no snorting when she laughs,..no obnoxious screechie voice, smells nice and not like hairspray, doesn't like to punch you in the nuts for laughs, she doesn't dress like a total whore....you get the idea. 3) She doesn't already totally hate all of your friends.....
Once they make it through this initial "I can stand her and sex is or will be good",..then it is time for the "Tolerance Date". You can completely have repeat overnights with one another and still never learn the things a good "Tolerance Date" will teach you. So the way I do this is simple. I plan a day trip somewhere...somewhere that requires you to be couped up in a vehicle together for AT LEAST 4 total hours, preferably longer...it can be an over night or not,..but I have learned what you learn on the way to the over night may make you want to drive home immediately after buying her a greyhound ticket....so I stick with day trips. See being locked up together in a vehicle lets you know many things....does she sing out of tune and the wrong words to songs....errr at the top of her lungs??? Does she constantly bitch about how cold/hot it is in the car/truck. Does she fuck with the mirrors and look through your console and glove box? Does she just change your radio station without warning and crank up somehting you despise?
Can she have an indepth conversation and work to keep you occupied while you drive...or just totally ignore you. Is she affectionate,..you know,..rubbing the back of your head,..or holding your free hand,...or hell even give you a "road blow" OOOPS I TYPED THAT OUTLOUD? Does she bitch completely about your driving. Does she have to stop every 10 minutes to pee.....will she pee on the side of the road without question? Does she speak non-stop or not even wait for a reply. Does she help load or unload the truck at the destination...does she point out something she thinks you might like or think is funny on the roadside or wherever? Does she show her tits to every trucker......YOU GET THE IDEA.....see being in a truck for a long trip,..especially coming home when you are tired and have had a long day can be very telling...does she doze off leaving you by yourself to get her home safely.....or does she do her best to keep you company to keep you from dozing off......does she bust out some snacks and either hand you a manageable portion or even feed you while you drive.....personally I think you can learn volumes this way........I mean WAY more than you would on dates. Driving and traffice have a way of bringing out the worst in people and if the trip is fun and enjoyable then maybe you have a found a person to hang with.....if you find yourself hoping for a car accident involving you,..well its best you go your separate ways...TRUST ME.....this is her true nature.....and yours too in the 4 hours of driving you will see both.......

A Sergeant I had in the USAF taught me this and within months I had a chance to learn of its value.

I was a Cop in the Air Force and she "Alyssa" was a nurse. Perfect right? I would go hang out with her at the hospital when i worked graveyard shift because it was quiet, they had the best coffee on base and it was bright inside. Her and I never went ona date,..but spent many nights chatting it up and then maybe a drink at the NCO Club....but our schedules (Days on/off) never really jived with each others,...so making a date was impossible. But finally after months, we both were to get off a decent time on a Friday afternoon and were not due back until late Sunday afternoon. We agreed that we would drive up to Alpine Helen in Georgia,..about a 3.5 hr trip. It is a very pretty town settled in the early 1800's by German immigrants. The city still has all of its Alpine charm and achitecture as well as being nestled in the largest mountains in Georgia.....very pretty place.
It was about 4 in the afternoon when we set out. She met me at my dorm room as I was hauling stuff to take with us for the trip,....we had pretty much agreed it was going to be an overnight trip. She followed me up and down the stairs as I loaded the truck,..never once taking initiative to help carry anything or even offer,...up and down she followed me just babbling about her day...i should have known then,...but I was thinking abut the action,..not the effort involved therein.....oh and the tolerance....We got ont he road and were on no more than ten minutes when she said she was hungry....I needed to fill up the truck so we stopped for food. She expected me to pay for both our dinners and pay for all the gas too,....that was NOT what we agreed to,..but either way she offered no financial assistance. She out ranked me and knew exactly how much I made,..but wasn't offering....either way she was going to pay for half of the room....we never discussed this being a date,...it was a road trip....but OK I can take it....I was only making about $300 every two weeks then and most of that went to insurance and truck payment.....but ok...I was going to have fun....ont he way there,..she went to sleep,..leaving me to drive....then she would wake up and crank up the heat (it was a chilly spell in May for Georgia)...this made me sleepy,..so I rolled down the window,..which woke her up and I had to stop and get her jacket out of her bag since it was too chilly out for her to get out.....ok...I needed to wake up anyway....we get there and stop to get a room,..so we could go out that evening and the next morning.....BOOOOOOKED SOLID...we stopped 5 or 6 places.....i forgot it was Memorial Day weekend....this was a holiday spot....her and I agreed to keep driving the next nice town was about 25 minutes away,..Chatanooga Tennesee,....we headed that direction,..she kept changing the radio station and just in general pissing me off witht he friggin heat,..my feet were burning up....I had to stop and duct tape the floor vent on my side....I should have smacked her and told her to sit there and quit bitching (ooops I typed that outloud didn't I). Chatanooga,...had zero vacancies,..so we proceeded East to Franklin, NC, where my family has a cabin,..it was very late though and I knew my granny was there. I called my dad and asked and he said the half the family was there....great there would be no room there either.....ol girl was asleep,..and I was tired of driving,....what started out as a three hour tour - a three hour tour (as in Gilligan's Island) was now 7 hours into driving. I stopped to fill back up the gas tank,..no financial assistance from her again,..and now the trip was getting to be very expensive....we get back on the road and not five minutes later she has to piss......and only a "CLEAN" bathroom would do.....I was still looking for a place to sleep....I stop at a gas station AGAIN....its now 2:30 a.m. or so......she gets back in and back on t he road we go now heading back home....I had given up,..my quest for the ever illusive hotel room and some action...we got home at sunrise,......I dropped her off at her dorm and left for mine,..there was barely a goodbye.....never spoke with her again..................

MOVING!!!

2006-06-29T08:23:00.000-05:00

I friggin hate moving and that is exactly I am doing! Next time; I am just leaving everything in the old place and moving me and my pets only to the new place............
Ok,..I will rant about it all later.....sorry for the lack of posts...............just got internet back last night at the new place......once settled I will be catching up......much to tell....."If" is now out.......the story is simple. Didn't even get to a "Tolerance Date" (to be explained later) I will post most recent date with her...when I can.......stay tuned!

Engineering

2006-06-07T22:50:00.000-05:00

Thanks Wingman T-bone............these are confirmed and undeniable Eljay...backed by science!

Date #2

2006-06-06T15:13:00.000-05:00

Okay, so "If" and I have been chatting on the phone for three weeks now,..ever since meeting at the beach....you can read about it here:
We have been out to lunch and that went reasonably well. I say reasonably, because it was only an hour,..we both had on our game faces, and it was the first time we had seen each other since the ten minute initial meeting in the parking lot at the beach. The cool thing is that we met very naturally. It was simple, it didn't involve alcohol and a smokey bar, and it was not a set-up....just plain old fashion "Hi, what's your name" with a hint of player from her side involved. Friday night we are going for round two, a real date. She is a little standoffish since she is fresh out of a long termer....6 years,....but fine by me. There is no pressure and no expectations and it should be fun. If all goes well and King Swingstein backs out of going to the races with me the 1st of July, I will offer her his seat. Swingstein has had an unfortunate bout of bad luck and thus may not be able to make a weekend of it and it would be a drive and expensive anyway. So I will more than likely still have his ticket to offer up. She likes racing and wants to go to one and it does make for a perfect "Tolerance Date"

So, back to the matter at hand.....I use the road trip to find out just how well two can get a long, because often times on the road we are faced with challenges, teamwork, and lots of conversation. BUT do not attempt this unless you have all of the will to suffer your own consequences......"If" was going to be next...........
BUT, I had to go on another date with ehr before I made the full offer, although I had dropped a hint and she was very recptive to the idea.......soooo the following Date #2 was all over the Jacksonville map. This was our official first date. I had picked her upa key ring from Vegas, just as a little gift,...little did I know she collects key rings and has several hundred of them....I got her a set of stainless steel dice on a chain,..pretty cool. I showed up on time, with flowers, and ready to have a good time. We left her place and went to Sushi Rock for dinner (she liked Sushi,..but hadn't tried many different types,.so we tried just about all of them. I introduced her to plum wine,..which I love with Sushi,..and of course Sake! We had a great time getting to know each other and eating,..so we went for a walk down to an art gallery that has a super local artist that I show to anyone I can. Luckily all of his work was on display in the front window, as the gallery was closed. We walked back to me truck talking about the art,..she loved it,...and dinner...
We were deciding where to go next, so we went to a hooka bar near my place....had a couple of drinks watched the band and some fat people dance....talk about entertainment. The music was only so-so , thus we decided to go to a little more hip of a place down the road,..all the time her and I were laughing holding hands,...basically having a great date..............We went to the next bar and the good times were rolling...we had a few more drinks and it began to get affectionate. A great kisser she was.........this is super important.......
We closed the place out, but neither of us was ready to go,...I had a couple of Smirnoffs in my cooler in the truck so we went down to the river to hang out,...we stayed in the truck and it began to get really fun,.....we were all over each other AND she started it......but the tiny bladder syndrome so many of you women have, came marching in full force so we left, and shortly after that I took her home......great date, fun night, semi-action,...and an agreement to do it again........

Friday Night Fights!!!

2006-06-06T15:09:00.000-05:00

Okay what do you and your mate fight about???

Does it seem like you and your partner are constantly at each other's necks? If so, you are not alone. Why do people who love each other argue so much? Let's get to the bottom of the vicious argument cycle by taking a close look at the most common, recurring, and unresolved conflicts, as well as how they are usually resolved.

Read the answers and the rest here:

Comments are open...comment at will,...plus include your favorite STUPID fight!!!!

Back Home

2006-06-02T09:18:00.000-05:00

Okay,..they lost my luggage on the way there,..why wouldn't it stand to reason they would lose it on the way back??? Well they did,....glad the airlines are batting 1000, unless you are scoring them on their ability to do two things 1) Move self-sorting cargo (me) 2) Move non-self sorting cargo (my bag). Now they almost lost me in Houston,..by making me late arriving for my connecting flight,..then changing the gate to a completely different terminal and not telling me until I got to the original terminal,..then had to hoof it at leat 29 miles (so it felt, via a tram, a conveyor, a long walk, another tram, and three escalators) to the new terminal where I almost missed the bus to the tar-mac to get on a small jet. Now if I made it,..why didn't my luggage? Anyway,...just my rant.

While in Vegas I looked at all the pretty womenwalking around and thought to myself...damn women have it easy.....today I saw this and realized hey! Its not so bad being a man!!!

Enjoy:

Good To Be A Man...
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be president.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
Dry cleaners and hair stylists don't rob you blind.
You can leave the motel bed unmade.
You can kill your own food.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You don't have to clean your apartment if the maid is coming.
You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking: "He must be mad at me."
You don't mooch off other's desserts.
You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
You are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You don't have to shave below your neck.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.

Oh Yeah I Forgot!

2006-05-30T05:26:00.000-05:00

"If" and I went to lunch the day before i left. It wass the first time seeing her since the beach incident....she was very pretty lunch was good...and we have been talking ever since.....Looks like a date on my horizon...we have discussed,..but set no plans...I am out of town obviously and when I get back next Friday,..she is going out of twon for the weekend.....sooooo......it may be a while...but I am kind of digging her.....cool chick.....sooooooo add "If" to the list.......

OKAY THIS PLACE IS OFF THE FUCKING CHAIN.........GEES.....I NEED A VACATION....OH WAIT I AM ON VACATION........NO WONDER YOU ONLY GET A FEW DAYS A YEAR TO VACATE!!! IT'LL KILL YA......RIGHTO.....AS WIFEY AND ELJAY WOULD SAY....BACK AT IT!!!!

HUNKA HUNKA BURIN LOVE..........!

Viva Las Vegas Part FO

2006-05-30T04:27:00.001-05:00

Good God I need sleep.............I am catching naps at the pool, after dinner in my room, and on the monorail....I now have a slight limp,...thanks to bad shoes....I have a sunburn.....a callus on my slot button finger,.....pretty sure my liver is ready to resign,........and I have had more beef than the State of Texas.....probably ought to try a salad while I'm here! I wouldn't trade any of this for anything.......WHAT A TOWN! I got a call from JM she is here and we will meet tomorrow....I think. Finally work starts,...well sort of. The convention get under way and all my peeps are now here...like I haven't partied enough.

So last night, I walk back into the casino in my hotel and as I am heading for the back bar to grab a drink, I see this very attractive woman playing the slots....I pass by and she looks at me....eye contact! She smiled and I smiled back with a wink. She watched me walk by as I continued to the bar.....I grabbed a drink and decided to go back to where she was....now this is why Vegas is different.....errrr very different. I sit at the slot next to her and say "Hi". She looks at me and says..."You look like you need some company." GREEEAT HOOKER! Errr well no, actually I don't need any company...but thanks. Back to slots she went. Out of curiosity I asked..."As pretty as you are,..you could easily have any man in the place....why hook? She said exactly what sums up many things. Her reply was "because I can"
Well Jimminey Fucking Christmas.....I can too,..but it sure as fuck doen't make it a great idea.....I thought to myself.....funny! I just don't get it,...but I am glad I wasn't getting it...well once I found out she was a prostitute that is......so then I logged this in my mind and began paying more attention to other girls in the place.....hmmmmm they were all over....tough to peg,...but once I got a knck for it they were easy to pick out...
I used to think that the airport was the place place to watch people,.....nope..VEGAS is. You have never seen anything funnier than a redneck from Po-Dunk USA win a couple of hundred on blackjack.....that is until you see a 5 foot tall Asian loose a grand at poker........both situations took all I had to keep from blowing Jack and Coke out of my nose.........FUNNY STUFF....

Vegas is definitely honeymoon paradise.....I have seen as many couples as I have seen singles....its crazy....some couple are total mismatches just from looking at them....he's fat and short.....she's totally hot......he must be hung or rich......a total stud, with a troll....she must have had his baby......big tall,.....fat short.....he's 5'3" she's easily 6'2".......it has shown me for sure that there is truly someone for eveyone.....mine apparently is taking her sweet fucking time revealing herself...but HEY.......at least now I know for sure......

Okay it's 2:40 a.m........I am heading back out!,...limp, callus, sunburn, picketing liver..et al!

Viva Las Vegas Part Tre

2006-05-29T03:09:00.000-05:00

Okay......I LOVE VEGAS.......this is just what the Dr. ordered for Datign Dave....not for anything other than putting it all in perspective.....I am eating unbelievable food......I am totally relaxed and not rushed for anything. I am stayin gout until 3 in the morning......yes its 2 a.m. right now and I am getting ready to go back out.....just came back to rest the feet.
I am feeling very rejuvinated. I will get some work motivation later this week...and maybe some new contacts and factories to represent (thats what this convention is all about) and I just in general feel better about the world.....I have seen things here that make me realize there are defintiely the "Haves" and the "Have Nots"....and I want to "Have" This city has a way of pumping life back into you....making you realize that when you're old you can sleep,....but life is far from a "read through" its for the taking.....I don't gamble persay, but I am learning that I need to gamble a bit more with everything.....I am WAAAAY too conservative in some things...wayyyyy to uptight about other.....you know what? None of it matters....HE WHO DIES WITH THE MOST TOYS WINS!
I am have slowly let go of issues...with work, ex's (Cubana, Psycho, Nascar) and realized life is waaaaaay too short.....there are so many things I haven't done (including getting married).....I have learned to realx now....Its been 5 years since a vacation for me...and you know....? I FUCKING needed one.....I feel better already,..and I still have more left,....sleeping late,..eating good,....not worrying things to frigging death..I come back to work for one day then a weekend,..when I get home......ALL IS GOOD...my Yin and my Yang are totally Yin-Yanging!!!

Ok more later....the drinking is really make me fat fingered!!!!

Viva Las Vegas Part Duex

2006-05-29T02:28:00.000-05:00

Day three in Vegas. Today I rented a car and drove to the damn Hoover Dam, dammit. That damn thing is a damn huge Dam. Pretty cool though, one of the modern engineering marvels. Hard to believe they did this in a little over 4 years, in the 1930's . Industry wasn't even ramped up for the war yet,....but the American ingenuity and spirit prevailed.

Okay,....if you ever go to Vegas wear good shoes.....I didn't I thought I would be riding the Monorail and driving a rental,...change of plans. Now my friggin feet are killing me. I am no pus about pain,.....but they ARE killing me. So therefore I must drink much much more....you know to fight the pain, of course.....

So last night I went down to the casino in the Sahara, it was early and my intent was to venture out into the Vegas world sometime around 9. There was a band playing so I thought I might sit in,..get my buzz on,..and hang otu for a little while. Sitting by herself, was a cute blonde, defintiely enjoying the music. I watched her for a minute and eventually we made eye contact,..then again,..then again...NO I WASN"T JUST STARRIGN AT HER WILLING HER TO LOOK AT ME!!!! But,..I was certainly in a postion to tell when she looked my way. Finally the band slowed down and went to the tried and true,..slow song,..so I went over and asked her to dance......I got a nervous,..ummm welll, errrrr ok!!! She was either nervous or very uncomfortable. But nonetheless we went to the floor to dance. I noticed she placed her hands very "formal" ok that's bad.....then we were at least 20" apart,..okay worse.....do I have spinach in my teeth? Garlic? Do I smell like beer...what is it lady???? I tried to make small talk and once I layed the charm on she opened up a little bit and began to relax......NOW IT IS WELLLLLL KNOWN I CAN"T DANCE......slow dancing I have a move or two...but nothing that would get me an award......Turns out she was the accoutant for the band,.....I think dating the singer too,..who was a black dude,.....and graduated with a major in dance from NYU.......would someone please shoot me......OH WAIT that will proabably be coming from the stage!!! SOOOOO needless to say dead end! But I gave it my all.....said goodbye,..and headed for the strip.....

The women here travel in packs.....not two ro three but,....4 to 20.....They are not here to pick up men as far as I can tell.....wellllll with that said barring the clubs.....maybe in there...but in general,...NO way.....I mean this is a transient town,...few are from here and those that are,..don't hang out on the strip or evne ride the monorail,....so unlike a normal city the chance meeting is slim. The clubs here are in the hotels...they have $15-50 cover charges and lines at midnight 40 deep.....no patience for that.....but definitely hot girls waiting to get in......I have little use for that,....so I wandered the strip. I have met many people,..but there will be no wedding for Dating Dave in Vegas for sure.......ooooooh wait......I still have 4 days left,..never know......and now all of the girls, some of whom I have know for years are showing up for the convention,....and now I will be in my element,..and best yet I get to hang with JM,..she has totally been my buddy for over 8 years,..and we have planned a night out on Wednesday (if she can free up from her duties,..this is a working event for her, whereas a 1/2 and 1/2 for me),.....so I will finally have partner in crime I hope.....plus she is getting me into PURE at the Bellagio for a closed party.......Should be a blast......

Anyway......I'll post more later this week.....

Viva Las Vegas!!!

2006-05-28T11:58:00.000-05:00

Greetings from LAs Vegas, Nevada...The City That Never Sleeps.....Sin City......Desert Emerald. Yeah, but its a dry heat!!! Well I made it, to the adult playground of Vegas. It truly is unlike any other city I have been too. It is 100% design around the gambling tourist. I got here late Friday night. The Stewardess on theflight from Philly (yeah Jacksonville to Philly to Vegas,..now thats what I call efficiency)..The Stewardess ( a 30 something tall blonde was a total player) She was hilarious and I spent a bulk of the flight, 4 hours, in the back of the plane cahtting it up with her. She was awesome and had a great sense of humor,..until she spilled blody mary on my leg after some turbulence.....but I drank them free the rest of the flight....
But I got to Vegas only to find that my luggage decided to stay in Philly...NICE! Bad luggage! Anyway,....I was pissed. I had been int he same clothes since 7 a.m. Friday morning EST....and now after some delays on my flights was still in the bloody mary stained jeans 12 a.m. Saturday mountain time some 16 hours later....I wanted a shower and some new clothes.....but luggage was not going to get to me until Saturday before 5......it showed at 4...BASTARDS!

Anyway much to tell,..but will do it later. Going with some new friends to the Hoover Dam,....going to pick up the rental car now......I will chime back in later. Met Jack Nicholson last night. He was in a bar at my Hotel,..problem was the lights in the bar were very red and did not work well with my digital....so I have one horrible shot,....but......its still him....cool dude, he was....HEEEEERRREEEEE'S JOHHHHNNNNNNNY! ;-)

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You Never Know

2006-05-20T15:09:00.000-05:00

I have been relegated to my apartment for 2 weeks now. Leaving only for work and the store for the most part. Why? Well I am going to Vegas next week,....and the only ting I could do to not spend money was to stay home. See? If I go anywhere I blow $10 here or $20 there and the next thing you know I am waiting for payday....But I want to blow some cash in Vegas,.....so I put my self on restriction! BAD DAVE!
But today,....I was getting stir crazy. I needed some air and some sunshine....I spent most of the morning deciding to go fishing or just to the beach. I chose the beach finally after my motivation level hit "Ramming Speed" It turns out that that was a very good choice. So let's back up to last nights adventure.
At my watering hole after work yesterday I saw a woman that occasionally comes in. She dresses very professionally (which I think is totally sexy) and we have had a few conversations. She has a great personality and is pretty cute. We got on great each time we have run into each other. Last night she was there to meet her sister. She came over to me as we were sitting at opposite neds of the bar,..but had thrown a couple of looks at each other. She is very sweet and affectionate to me,..putting her arm around my neck as she stood behind me. We exchanged a couple of niceties and I told her that I thought she was cute as a button,...she said she thought I was too.....well there you have it....her sister came and went and I went over to sit with her. I asked her what she was doing later and she said nothing....I asked her if she wanted to go watch the band at Farahs....she said that sounds cool,..can I bring my sister? Of course!
She wrote her phone number down and told me to call her. We sat and chatted for a little while and we got into marriage....then I asked if she had kids and she said yes...a boy. I pressed for details and she said he was in Iraq....she is 2 years older than I and I was doing the math in my head on him being at least 18. She pulled out he wallet and showed me a picture of him,......THEN of his daughter....yep,..you guessed it GILF! She was married at 16 had him by 17 and now he is 18 and married and now has a kid himself....GREAT! Needless to say.....we have been through this before....WTF? I did call her later,....but she did not answer or return my call. Hmmmmmm why do women do this? I didn't ask for her number she offered it....anyway.....
So today I go to the beach...and hang out,...didn't evne bring a towel,..I just wandered around and found a spot on the sand to park my hat, cellphone, sunglasses so I couldd head into the cool water. It was 95 degrees today, but the water was in the mid 70's perfect! I walk around for a little while longer then head up to the shore front shops and wander around there too...I never do this but I really didn't feel like coming home...So finally I wander back to my truck. I start it up to get the AC going and dust off the sand from various body parts. I get in the truck and I look to my left and two cars down is this cute girl flagging me down. I am thinking dead battery or something. I roll down the window and I say "Yes Ma'am!" She say I need a huge favor. Ok what can I do for you. Parking at the beach totally sucks and parking spots are a premium. She says listen I have a friend meeting me here and she can't find a spot. I found this one and since you're leaving would you wait until she gets here so she can have your spot. I said sure, how far away is she...? She's right downt he street, I just called her. So I said okay, she said it will only be 2 minutes. I said Righto 2 minutes, but one second loger and I peel out of here...got it lady? She laughed I laughed.....and I said....this is going to cost someone a date! She says to me I would absolutely go on a date with you... Iwas stunned. She says,..it shows a lot about your character waiting there and being nice to me....so I get out of my truck. She was cute and very nice and based on our conversation, intelligent.....she had a very nice car,..and a very nice bikini ;-))
We chatted while her friend was trying to find us....I asked her name and she said "IF" (not really,....but thats what we are calling her,....IF I was 5 minutes later I would have never met her. IF I would have just backed out and left without acknowledging herI would have never met her....SO IF it is). I asked her if the number she gave me was really to Luigi's Pizza...and she said NO call it,....I want your number anyway,...so I called it sure enough it was her. So I said were you serious about the date and she said ABSOLUTELY....I said well I have nothing else to do for sure....she her either.....and beside this is a KARMA thing!!! Her friend showed up,..I gave up the spot and she waived at me and said nice to meet me,....I said the same...last words from her..CALL ME! Funny. So I will call her, she was very cute....I know nothing more than this about her and she looked kickass in a bikini!!! I will keep you updated....

When Ex's Attack!

2006-05-19T15:54:00.000-05:00

What's For Sale???

2006-05-19T14:59:00.000-05:00

For Sale: Can't afford to maintain anymore... Going to school. High mileage,
worn out interior, loud, lots of modifications, used to be fun but now its
boring, not very reliable, but stands up to a beating, test drivers welcome.
Best offer. Call Rob @ (905)822-XXXX, or if you want the car call (416)754-XXXX

Now that's funny!!!! DD

Its Lonely In Space

2006-05-18T21:10:00.000-05:00

Okay,..I have been on MySpace for a few weeks now. Cool that I have run onto old friends for sure,..but I was hoping for a little something something! Here is a great typical dating story....I noticed today that Lexus reemerged......I met her on MySpace and we hit it off,.....we were planning our first trist. It comes down to the Friday before,..actually the night I was to pick Cubana up from the airport 9yes,..so what she was my rebound and I deserved this), but she (lexus) stated she was reconciling with her ex.......and they were getting back together....this only addedinsult to injury for me but perhaps I deserved it,...she was my #2,..its only fair I was hers....but I was pissed,..because we did hit it off.....and she played me....no biggy, but dammit man!
So now she is back,..we have not made contact,..but will I am sure.............

Myspace emails sent 79: Responses 6....no prospects.....going to regroup and form a new battleline. I will post all of my pics here for voting....Committee you are to decide, with others also involved.......we are going to pick top 5 of 12.........will update this weekend!
D

The Swingsteins

2006-05-18T18:32:00.001-05:00

No they are not a Jewish rock band, and frankly they aren't even related by marriage or otherwise, but they are my friends and they swing. Swing you ask?? Isn't that something they did in the 70's? Well err yes! And apparently they still do it today. Now barring a few ummmm skeletons in my closet,..This is not my cup of tea, however....I find it interesting. King Swingstein is a friend of mine and a colleague (not of swinging, but professionally), he does this all the time. Now we have compared war stories and although I believe to have him beat in bed post notches,....it won't stay that way if he keeps tagging two at a time,.....virtually cutting my lead in half each time. But he is not the only one (well obviously it takes two to tango, but I am excluding his live in Queen Swingstein). KS and I are relatively new friends, but we have been colleagues for a couple of years, but until recently had not gotten very personal in our conversations.
At my watering hole is also a few Swingsteins, related? Doubtful,....but same same. One has attempted over and over to get me involved, we'll call her Pork Chop...she is relatively attractive MILF, and very funny an fun to hang out with. She and her Hubby swing pretty regular, mostly because he can't stop her from getting action on the side, and if you can't beat them join them.....PCS has been trying to get me in the rack for at least 3 months. And if I sit next to her at the bar I often get molested to some degree...I even get late night booty calls. I have declined....Last Friday a cute, augmented, slim, mid-thirties young lady slid up to the bar next to PCS and I. We'll call her Lean Swingstein. Her and PCS hit it off pretty quick. So much that I thought they knew each other prior, but after some discussion they did not. But they became rather friendly with each other and then of course me, attempting to lure me away from the bar to another dive. Had it not been for the hell week I had I work,..I would have at least entertained the idea of moving to another venue,..but I was quite content sipping my beer, followed with shots of cherry vodka and then heading home to grill a steak.
I got many phone calls that night from them begging me to come up and hang out with them. Come Monday I heard the story, almost sorry I missed it. And Lean was definitely the piece of work I thought her to be. But after things I have done in my life this lifestyle isn't for me, even if King Swingstein keeps trying to talk me into it. I think I have perhaps become more jealous as I have gotten older and wouldn't share too well. I certainly couldn't do this with someone I am involved with beyond booty calls now. It's not stage freight by any stretch I can be quite the exhibistionist and it definitely not anything else,...So I began to kind of dissect it. You know what I conclusion I came to? I am out seeking a wife,...not a lay and the worst part is that might be exactly my problem. Does that mean I am changing my ways? Naaaaaahhhhh, but if enough alcohol flows and the dry spell long enough who knows.
I do thinks its funny some of the stories KS tells me though, luckily when I was more errrrr, ummmm inclined to do these things, I can completely understand where he is coming from, and to say the least it is definitely less complicated.....than dating. But KS and I got into a conversation that he liked having the new adventures and so did Queen.....but my argument centered around my experience with women, and thus became the crux of my argument. I prefer to find someone moderately good at shagging, and then train them to please me and be trained to please them.....because it is then when sex comes across at 4 or 5 levels of the psyche that I find it fun. I understand both sides of the coin,....but there is not doubt after all these years and the shear number of women I have shagged that sex is the best with someone you have trained to be exactly what you want and it turn have been trained....but with that said I do miss the fun of just breaking anonymous furniture with strange to a degree...I guess both side have validity!
So unless I have a record breaking dry spell (doubtful) or too much drink (possible) I stick to the mission plan. I will live vicariously through King and Queen Swingstein,..and giggle at the sometimes drama that happens when you swing..........

Date Rape Drug...Men Beware

2006-05-18T14:57:00.000-05:00

IMPORTANT NOTICE:

Police warn all male clubbers, partygoers and unsuspecting pub regulars to be more alert and cautious when accepting a drink offer from a woman.

There is a date rape drug going around called "beer" and it appears in liquid form. - The drug is being used by female sexual predators at parties to persuade male victims to have sex with them.

"Beer" is available virtually anywhere. All a women has to do is persuade a guy to consume a few units of "beer" and simply ask him home for "no-strings-attached sex". Men are rendered helpless against such attacks.

After several "beers" men will often succumb to performing sex acts on horrific looking women who they would never normally be attracted to.

Men often wake up after having "beer" with only hazy memories of what happened to them the night before -- just a vague feeling that something bad occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men might be conned into a familiar scam known as "a relationship" -- apparently men are easier victims for this scam after the "beer" has been administered and they have already been sexually attacked. Forward this alert to every male you know..........

However, if you fall victim to this insidious drug and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter in an open manner with a bunch of similarly affected victims.

For your nearest support group, look up "Taverns" in the yellow pages.

Updates coming tonight. "The Swingsteins" and follow up on MySpace,....funny thing about Space,...it sure is lonely.....

"Player" status,...I have been benched for weeks......but I am warming up for the game this time.

Vegas............What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas as the saying goes................UNLESS you are "Dating Dave" in which case I will be blogging live from Vegas,......errrrr well sort of....May 26th-June 1st. I wonder just how much trouble I can get into in 6 days......I will know some people there so it should be interesting.....including JM (you know who you are)...she is the only person who's love life can be as bad as mine!!! Will post later

Right of Passage

2006-05-16T19:22:00.000-05:00

My grandfather was a barber and so was his father. Collectively between them was 125 years of Barbering experience! Now that may not seem like it means very much, I mean a Barber???,..but let me say that to me and any even remotely refined man it means more than anyone can explain......but let me try. Growing up, particularly as a little boy,..I would occasionally have to go to my "Pop's" Barber Shop,..he was either babysitting me or I was in need of having my "ears lowered". I remember those trips with such vividness that they are forever a part of me. The smell of Clubman by Pinnaud, the smell of Barbasol shaving cream, the stories old men tell when they hang out on a Saturday morning, talking about their gardens, their yards, their cars, their boyhoods, their kids, their grandkids, their families, and things old men talk about.
When I was 12 or so, Pop asked me if I wanted a man's haircut......I was 12 and in the sanctity of the Barber Shop, surrounded by men of all generations.....of course. And when your grandfather asks you that,..of course you say "yes". It was that day that I remember in particular. This day is exactly why every person should spend time with their grandparents,..and exactly what is some times is missing from our society......TRADITIONS...and the value your own history contains. Why was today a right of passage, just like that day?
Well, growing up around a 2nd generation barber is a part of Americana. It is a part of our history and a lost art. Today you roll up to the Stuper-Cuts or Head of Hair or whatever and walk in to several women either busy "styling" hair or giving a quick cut. Nothing that is even remotely close to the days of old. Now,...... its a matter of convienence or inconvienince depending on how you view a haircut,.....long ago it was an event! A Saturday morning,...a day for a man that worked hard all week to catch up on gossip, get treated royaly, get cleaned up, and relax for a moment in his life. This won't make sense to some that read,..but I will clear this up for you!
As I said this is completely a lost art,..most women that read this will have no understanding of it, until they see the results,..and most men that read this will barely remember a day as such...but I seek these things out! I am hardly the normal man. And when it comes to getting a haircut,...it is soooo much more to me than most.....and to me thats ashame...it is a pleasure for me and I look forward to it.....why? Because it doesn't have to be just a haircut!
Knowing all this,......I experienced something today that gave me new hope and made me feel awesome....Since I come from a barber background (although not a Barber myself) I appreciate getting the treatment. Women have manicures, pedicures, spas, and facials and many other things that sometimes can make them feel like a queen. Although men CAN go to get these as well, its likely you will be beat up as you come out of one of these places by any man passing by,...and as well you should be. But men, have little in the way of making them feel like a KING, which we all know outranks the Queen!! ;-))
Today I went to my normal barber,...which as I stated has become less of an event and more of an inconvienience. This all changed today when I met "T" the Barber. As I walked in, normally there are three women working there. It is a "Barber Shop" in the regard that there is a Barber pole outside and there are Barber chairs inside. But aside from that nothing special. Today I walked in an "T" was sitting in one of the chairs (something all Barbers do is sit in their own chairs and read the paper). I had never seen "T" there before. He hopped up and asked me to sit. For the next 30 minutes I got the treatment. What is the treatment? Well it starts like this......unlike StuperCuts or any other knock-off Barber wanna be,...you DO NOT get hosed down with chilled water from a spray bottle so that your hair can be cut. You are not shampooed with Aardvark-apple essence imported crap and scalding then freezing water while rocked back into a nasty ass sink. You get a dry cut, as it should be. So as I sit down, I explain what I want in Barber terms to a real Barber.....it was awesome,..he knew exactly what I wanted.
I gave him the run down: #2 guard sides and back, square the neck, even the side burns, trim the top to layer, cover the crown.......ahhhhhhhh great old fashioned Barber lingo....
He didn't proceed to just clip, he started on oneside and went around to the other like an artist. Then out came REAL Barber shears, not the hedge clippers the hacks use...but real Barber shears. I hear a noise, very familiar...he was sharpening them on a REAL leather Barber sharpening strap,..WOW a professional and OLD SCHOOL! For ech clip he made,..there was the tale-tale sound of three extra clips clearing the shears of hair. He didn't just comb the hair down and cut it even,...OH NO! He combed at angles and cut. He lifted hair with his fingers and cut.....it was Michael Angelo like. Then he went back to clippers to clean up the neck and ears. Then I hear my favorite sound in the world and as I was listening to it,...I felt the warmth of a hot towel placed over my neck and ears.....BLISS I tell you BLISS,...I knew what was next. YEP HOT LATHER.......over the ears, around the neck....man what a feeling! Then the freshly leathered straight edge razor (few people even know how to open one). As if he was a sculpter sculpting art in clay, he removed the unwanted short hair from above my ears and neck....that is a feeling I can explain to no one,..he gingerly wiped the lather off onto the still warm towel he draped over my schmock, that relaxed my shoulders.....the feel and sound of a straight razor trimming, is one you never forget....then immediately I could smell Clubman ( a very benign manly smell, so familiar to me...it is a light soapy clean fragrance and as familiar as Old Spice, just not near as strong and the same since the 1870's). He wiped the Clubman over my ears and neck to soothe any razor burn,..of course there was none,..but going from warm lather to evaporating alcohol,..will almost make you shiver with delight!
Was it over here???? Hell no it wasn't over, thankfully....I was melting in the chair. Then I got a light dusting of talc, with a REAL Barber "Duster" further cooling my neck and face.....I was dusted of ALL cut hairs,....not one annoying cut hair left on my face, nose, ear, neck....it wasn't in my shirt,..it was all strategically placed on my schmock. Then the last familiar sound......the massage!!!!! OH HOW I LOVE THE MASSAGE!!! See, back in the day when men got "The Treatment" the massager was an art all of its own, there is no rubbing, there are no attachments....it is the size of half a red brick. It plugs straigt into 120volts (not some wussy battery operated junk) and it had four springs that wrapped around its face. I knew the sound the second I heard it.......Wow PLEASE NEVER LET THIS END!!!!!! The Barber puts the brick on the back of his hand and the springs stretch across his palm. He then lays his palm springs down in three places resting about 10 seconds at each. He starts on the left shoulder muscle, then the back of the neck, then the right......this is no wussy vibration,..this is industrial strength I tell ya! So strong that when its on your neck,..your vision blurs.......
Done yet? Oh no......next he asked if I wanted my goat-tee trimmed. Why yes of course I would, thank you. Carefully and with precision first the clippers then the shears,...making sure all whiskers were equal. Then a quick snip of the eyebrows......to remove the long hairs that grow too easily here and no longer on top of my head!
Finally I was handed the mirror, to check out his work...PERFECT! And just as I asked. He pulled the schmock off of me carefully making sure not one hair landed on my slacks or shirt. During the entire time cutting we talked about fishing,..ohhhh how the reds were running and the flounder were fat and easy to catch on mud minnows......while talking he never missed one cut, never paused for a second,...unlike the hacks,..who have to stop to talk. I found a new fishing hole and told him of one of mine.....
Only one thing was missing and that was an elderly black man, shining shoes in the window for $2. I miss the snap sounds of a fast polish and mirror like shine,..but this was enough for one day. Women eat your hearts out! You spend $40 bucks on nails and manicures, and from a Vietnamese (as I am told are the best for this) lady you can't talk to. I spent $12 on this episode and tipped him an addtional $5, so all this for under $20. From now on the third Monday of every month, "T" and I have a Man-Date! To cut my hair, and talk of successes in fishing, and probably of our families, just like the tradition I was raised in.....
I walked out of there feeling like a million dollars,..no 2 million. I looked dapper, was not itchy, and was looking forward to the weekend when I can try out my new fishing spot! Truly a man moment...and we get so few!!!!! This is a lost art and a lost tradition. Women if you have children, get your husband or significant other (because Barber shops are MAN ZONES, kind of like a club) and take your boys down to a piece of Americana, The Barber Shop! Saturday morning is the best time to go!
If I made this sound virtually erotic to me,...its because it is in a weird way! AS I explained this experience to my favorite bar fly,...a slight man, short, in his mid 60's,....he knew of what I spoke and wanted every single detail! When I was done....he said that was almost erotic told as only the grandson and great grandson of a barber could tell it....we then traded barber shop stories from our youths, his cuts only cost $1.25 and he would walk there every 1st Saturday of the month. "T" has a new customer!
I tell you all of this because men require a "Cave" this is elluded to in Men are from Mars and Women are from somewhere else book. It is also noted here in part:

"GAINESVILLE, Fla. — From strip clubs and golf courses to barber shops and garages, a University of Florida English professor has pulled back the curtain on the last oases of unfettered masculinity and written a new book aimed at explaining just what makes those places so attractive to the burlier sex.

What’s more, those cave-bear haunts are on the endangered list, the victims of political correctness and gender equality, says James B. Twitchell, author of “Where Men Hide” (Columbia University Press). The book, illustrated throughout by photographer Ken Ross, is due out early next month.

When it comes to hiding, Twitchell says, don’t expect men to necessarily know what you’re talking about."

You can find the article in it's enirity here:

The BARBER SHOP IS A MAN CAVE and my new place to seek solice as it was once long, long ago....

Overloaded!

2006-05-15T19:02:00.000-05:00

Okay well work has been keeping me super busy,...and thats a good thing. I have heard from Cubana, she was checking up on me. I am not sure what that means, but it was via email and last for two go rounds....I let it go at that. It was idle chit chat, and apparently she has checked up on me via my bartender as well (a mutual friend)....we will see what happens in July,..when i suspect I may see her again. Time will tell...

So as an update today:

22 March 2006
LOVE AT 365TH SIGHT
TRUE ROMANCE 'TAKES A YEAR'
By Graham Brough

MANY old romantics will beg to differ...but scientists reckon there's no such thing as love at first sight.

In fact, they claim it takes a year for couples to find true romance.

So that knotted feeling in the stomach when you first spot the person you want to share the rest of your life with is not the real thing, according to researchers.

True love is a "combination of passion, intimacy and commitment" which does not kick in until about 12 months into a relationship.

A study of 147 couples who met through online dating agency Match.com found that 61 per cent had high levels of the three components - and most had been together a year.

Around 16 per cent experienced "companionate love", with intimacy and commitment but not much passion. Those who had just met or had not been together long were going through what the researchers from Bath University called non-love, with low levels of all three ingredients.

Study chief Dr Jeff Gavin said: "To date there has been no systematic study of relationships formed online. Love is an important predictor of success, stability and relationship satisfaction. It is a multi-faceted concept."

But the line "I think I'm falling in love with you, just give it a year" does not have the same romantic ring about it.

mirrornews@mgn.co.uk

Cubana,....The end....

2006-05-08T22:23:00.000-05:00

For the last two weeks I have been trying to decide how to end the Cubana story. Most of all I had to wait for it to end. It perhaps finally ended April 28th. I say perhaps, because in many regards you never can tell,..and by the end of this post you will understand. I debated long and hard on how to post this and whether I was even ready to post about it at all...maybe I need a little closure,...but this won't have the details of past posts. There are still some very hurt feelings left in me and I am sure in her as well.... You can read about the beginning of this tale by clicking here:
When I met Cubana I thought to myself that there is no way in hell anything would happen between us, but each time we spoke, each time we saw each other it was the same thing. It has been perhaps 9 years or so since I was as compatable with someone as I was with her, and I can say the same for her. We spent only one afternoon, night, or overnight together once a week. We found ourselves spiraling into either certain death or true love. It was weird. She would tell herself that this was not happening and we were just friends. We discussed my dating, but quickly it became a sore subject. Not only did I not want to date,..but I didn't want to even think about another girl. She on the other hand claimed to want me to date,..but when I wouldn't tell her details of the dates I did go on,..she would press for whether or not I had slept with them or had feelings that could lead me to another relationship. I started to see some jealousy.
It was odd in that we were both looking for a way out,..but the harder we looked the more we found in each other. She began talking less her significant other and I began to hear of their true problems. Yes the "BUT" here was hat she was married. We both had a tremendous feel for each others emotions and situations, as if we had been friends for years, maybe decades. When ever we went out it was so easy to just be ourselves. We honestly liked being with each other and felt no pressure,..maybe I thought I was playing the field and what did I care,..and she perhaps thought what does she have to lose she still has a husband....I don't know,..but I will tell you that there was nothing,..... not even a little,..... false about whatever the hell it was we shared. We did a ton of things, from the Blues Festival to late night French toast. From pizza in one of the smallest towns in North Florida to walks around the fort at Ft. Caroline. We did fondue and had a fling in the ruins of the slave quarters at the Kingsley plantation (I think there are laws about that). For all that happened it was beginning to hit both of us that before long we would no longer be able to see each other. She is in a failing marriage,..but has a hard head and wanted to try it one more time. He had cheated on her and then got sent over seas....I knew he would be back and she was worried because it would either work out or get very ugly....either way we both knew nothing good could come from this....
There is so much to tell about this story that I will have to do it over several posts going forward, but I will give the conclsuion today. The weekend of the 23rd was my Birthday weekend and we agreed that she was going to take me out for dinner and some fun. She drove up and we made some drinks,...she was tired as was I,..... so we took a nap and just kind of held onto each other for about an hour or so....it was nice and there was nothing more to it....we got up and decided to get a snack and go to the pet store. On the way we stopped by the grocery and picked up some snacks to eat on the way to the pet store. On the road from there we found a new Cuban restaraunt near my place. So she said she wanted me to try Tre Leche,, three milk cake. We went in ordered some adult beverages and coffee. But by the time we were ready to order we had decided to also get a sampler platter of fried plaintains, roast pork,..and other traditional Cuban finger foods....I love Cuban by the way....after we were done we raced to the pet store and then to dinner before both closed, it was getting late. We talked in depth at dinner and it became clear there was much more to us then either of us had thought and we knew it was only getting harder to say goodbye each time.....we came back to my place,....so that we could check on her dog and walk up to a bar near my place that had a live band....and that we did!
We got there as the band was wrapping up,..but they always play good music on the system there anyway,..so we had some more drinks,...and then ordered some pita and huumus. The jukebox was playing some salsa or at least spanish guitar tunes,...so I finally learned the Salsa!!!! The very first thing she promised to teach me when we met. We walked home and grabbed her pooch and took her down by the river to walk....we held hands and picked hybiscus from the bushes around the apartments for her,..it was just a romantic walk....we got back to the apartment and she was on a pain medication for a bad ankle injury,..which made her very sleepy,..she fell asleep leaning up against my chest while we were watching TV in bed....the next morning she woke me up with a what every man should get on his B-day!!!! You do the math okay!!! we rolled around for another hour or so and fell back asleep....when we woke up again,.we got in the shower. I had to take her to the airport in about 2 hours, so there was no rush. I made coffee and breakfast and she was finishing getting ready. She asked me for a another towel,...I picked up her purse to move it from the clean towel it was on and handed it to her. We joked around about nothing reallY for the next few minutes. I came back in to the kitchen. She came out of my room with a look on her face I cannot explain and asked if I asnwered her phone......NO WHY WOULD I DO THAT? Well it was her husband who called and apparently when I moved her purse the planets aligned perfectly and he was calling right as I moved it. I never heard it ring and she frequently turned it off or to vibrate. Well the line was connected for the next 7-8 minutes....next thing I knew her other phone was ringing, it was him,..she went blank and walked outside to answer it....she came back in a few minutes later and said he had heard our conversation and commented that that would be the divorce....she needed to leave for the airport,..so we packed my truck with her stuff and left....it was awkward,..what do I say? Nothing would be right,...nothing would change...it was what is was....she vented a few times about him and what this would mean. She asked why I wasn't bothered by it,....I was,..but again what do I say,..we were just friends after all, right? I mean at least thats what we told ourselves.
I pecked her goodbye and we hugged,....she entered the terminal. I knew I would see her next Friday night when I picked her up...
The week was long and because of the time differences we didn't talk as much as we normally would. She was in training and I was working on several projects. We got to talk maybe once a night. But Thursday I could tell something was wrong. So I asked....she said her hubby had asked what really happened and she lied to him,..but that he forgave her for lying to him about all Sunday morning and where she actually was, yet he still didn't know the truth,..she is a horrble liar and rarely does it,...her memory is waaaay tooo short to even keep one straight, soo. She also told me they agreed to give their marriage one more chance. They had been together for 10 years, 6 married. I got a little bit pissed and we eneded up in our first argument. By the end of the phone call we had agreed that after I brought her back to my place she was going to leave and that would be the last time we would be together. it was for the best at least for now. I picked her up and we hugged hello,..and it was a silent ride until about halfway home. We discussed everything,..but there was still no other. She said she would know by July whether it was going to work with her husband as he was coming home for two weeks. I know they will fight,..they seem to do that the most, since I have been privvy to phone conversations between them, often not by choice. But she had to do what ever she had to do. We got to her truck in my lot,..and finally were face to face. We said wonderful things to each other and I looked at her and said...I don't want to, but I do love you and she said that she loved me too,..we just stood there, then laughed, then kissed deeply. We held each other for 5 minutes or so.....by the end we were both crying. I asked her to do me a favor: "If you miss me or want me and can't be with out me call me, I will not call you, if you find out I am the man for you, don't let anything stop you from coming back to me" She began to cry harder,..and threw up the pinky swear....and kissed me. I opened her door and we just stared at each other.....I walked away and stood on the sidewalk,...she backed out and stopped,...rolled down her window and beckoned me over. I went.

C: Maybe there will be a day for us one day again. I will miss you very much, you are very deep in my heart!
D: Just swear to me the minute you realize, that you'll find your way back to me.
C: David I swear! I have to do this though even if we both know what will come of it.
D: Just go,....but you are taking a piece of me
C: I leaving you a piece of me though.....
we kissed one more time.

I watched her drive off wiping away her tears, while I was wiping mine....she looked back one more time.....I waived. I have not heard from her since....I don't think I will....at least not until July, if at all....I am not waiting on her,..but I am far from being ready to move on....sometimes you meet people that enrich your life. Sometimes you don't find love,..it finds you. And sometimes it disappears as fast and furious as it arrived. Passion and love are very different entities,...but one could not exist without the other,..and when they show up together, a man,..this man becomes invincible.
There was much much much more to this story,..but I cannot go into it,...it needs to stay with me for now. I will miss Cubana and I am getting over it,..but I will never forget it as long as I live........and maybe one day she will find her way back,....and maybe I am better off without her,...and maybe there was a lesson to be learned.....what I do know is that two people met who could have spent the rest of their lives together. I know that, there was nothing superficial or fake about any of it. I know that I have once again ended heartbroken. I know also that one day I will find love like that again,..maybe even better.......

There you have it,...keep the comments to a minimum on this one.....I don't need I told you sooos, or it was doomed from the start. I don't need to keep my head up. I need to mourn for it,....and then I need to move on taking with me the best B-day I ever had, my new ability to dance the Salsa,...and a secret hope her and I will cross paths again.

So for a little while I will not be dating....too much has happened in the last year to make me over anxious on anything to do with dating. I will still be posting and if opportunities arise I will address each, but for now I have many things going on,..see next post...

Busy, But Updating

2006-04-28T08:03:00.000-05:00

Sorry for the lack of posts.....been busier than a three legged cat burying a turd on a frozen lake for the past several weeks....

The Cubana Saga ends tonight,....as soon as I can blog about it I will wrap it up,....it has all of the tales of misfortune, great luck, bad luck, miscommunication, irony, fun, and torture that all good dating/love stories should have.....no not in love, never made it that far,.....but it has certainly turned out to be a tale of damned if you do, damned if you don't. I pick her up at the airport at 11 and we have agreed that this has to be the last time we see each other most likely forever....sad story really....Certainly for the better. This one has been the biggest soap opera of them all,..yep even soapier (is that a word??) than "Thatgirl"

No truer statement has been made than "What a tangled web we weave, when we practice to deceive!"

Updates coming including "Introducing Lexus" newest of the dates,....it actually occurred a week ago,..but I had a b-day tossed in there as well as some drama....with a hint of passion....WTF? So I will introduce Lexus to the mix and "Shy" another new meet.....but unlikely to be a date....

MySpace Update: In my quest to at least meet as many women as possible to widen t he pool of candidates......I have now emailed 43 different women,..using all of my charm and wit errrr sometimes displayed here ;-) Most times not!!!! In writing them emails to foster communication...of those only one replied....damn I must be uglier than I think....naaaaaahhhh,...maybe I'm not as funny or creative as I think??? Naaaah can't be that, I even crack me up! Soooo what is it.....

So up to the date tally:

43 contacts made on my part only 1 reply

4 new contacts made with me by them 2 still ongoing

plus 1 from last Myspace Exploration :The Final Frontier here

When I make contact with new women on Myspace,..its not at all implying dating however,...I do only email those who have, "Dating, Relationships" as part of their profile....but I email them friendly not "Date Me Dammit" stalker like,.....but judging by some of the women I know on MySpace,..they get bombarded by emails from men,..and I mean bombarded,....so while your email may be read it one of many,....I think I am going to try to develop a form letter of some sort,..so that I just fill in the blanks of why I am contacting them like "Hey I like that band too" or whatever....haven't decided. What I have noticed though is that like every other situation where a man is trying to meet women,....they get to decide, not you....unless you are so incredibly hot or have money pouring out of your pockets,..you have to find a major way to stand out....Thank God my poor ugly ass is funny.....at least I have my way to stand out nailed,..problem is.....I have to actually be in or near a conversation witht he target/victim,..to actually be funny....being laughed at (which can happen from across the room) is vastly different than being laughed with.

Not so long ago,..when I first began dating again, post "Indy" time frame 2002 (my live in gf or 5 years) I was tired of writing email after email after email,...I was online dating at the time, I actually developed a Dating Resume.....I must say it was one of my finest pieces of work to date,...somehow though, the best version has been misplaced. I think I may redevelop it....I'll post it here for comments once done....then I may just start sending that out,..since dating is like applying for a job, right? and First impressions, ethnicity, skills, and back ground matter even more and there is no Equal Opportunity Commission for dating to protect and give all a fair chance,...you have to be spot on first try....the interview or even cover letter must be flawless...
So I think I will get on that today if I free up.
The beauty of the resume is that it is so spoofed and satirical and most all unique it has worked every time used,..even if its just an email back from HR (potential date) that I don't want to date you,..but that was funny,..forwarded it to a friend that may......which has happened once....

Originally when I did the "Dating Resume" it was because I met a very pretty somewhat single woman who happened to be HR (Human Resources) for the local public library (I called her the Hot Librarian, She called me Hot Wine Guy, since when we met I bought her a glass of wine). I managed to get a phone number and email,..but work only,...from her.....I decided what better way to ask her out than to apply for a date.....I didn't get a date....she was living with her soon to be ex,...but it wasn't quite over yet. We stayed in touch for weeks, even as she moved out,..but there was baggage since she just left a long term live in.....anyway....had I caught her 6 months later with it,..I guarantee I would have been "hired".

i will post some other posts today, as I feel like it....still a little bummed over the end of Cubana,..so it will totally depend on my mood. Funny how we can meet all the right people, but be totally at the wrong place at the wrong time...for it to work out.....oh well thus is life....I think of how often I have been at the right time and the right place with the wrong person, and I am not sure which is worse...

GUEST BLOG Argument and Hilarity: MEN vs. Women

2006-04-17T11:39:00.000-05:00

So a few days back,...okay a week.....or so...Wifey and El(RugbyWife *CM* and Eljay *CM* my favorite evil Comittee Members) decided we were going to guest blog. Although I love them dearly,...they are lazy when it comes to this (as you can tell by the number of updates at RugbyWife Blog....ooooooh *Poke*). So I started mine for them.....it was somewhat accurate,...very spoofed and even sarcastic....but it was a generalization about men vs. women.....
I sent it to Eljay and Wifey for comments.....then they sent it back.....it was ON after that....I commented back....this thing turned out to be hilarious,....but I will let you decide.
It goes like this:
Regular post is: White
Eljay comments in: BLUE
Wifey in: PINK
Dating Dave comments to comments in: Green
Unless Wifey or Eljay get lazier (if thats possible) This was written for their blog and will be posted there as well.....I am sure there will be additional commentary before that happens....since you know Editor has privledges.....

ENJOY! Wifey, Eljay, and DatingDave

Hi! I am Dave...from Dating Dave.
I am State side, where the women are the meanest, snobbiest, most evil creatures ever to walk the face of the earth! AAAAnnnnnnnnnddddd I love them for it! I have met women from all over the world. I have dated online, offline, underline, underfire (if psycho NAME WITH HELD gets his way - hee hee) SEEE I tell you way too much and you go in the first sentence and smack me around,......NOT FUNNY! and from the firing line. I consider myself to be pretty well rounded when it comes to their ways.....suffice to say I know even less than I did before I started dating. In fact each date I feel my IQ go down by at least a point....after 18 years of dating or so,....I am barely above a drooling mongrel caveman Neanderthal is a better word – sorry…couldn’t help it…WORD NERD rightto on Neanderthal and really right on WORD NERD…….Okay stop with the strike through its not funny just annoying.....see you have to poke the bear in the cage don’t you......I have a point here!!! ,..who has decided that hitting them on the head with a club is not really such a bad idea if it weren’t illegal.
So then I meet these two lovely ladies (OK…now obviously this guy has never met either of us! Stop laughing and get off the floor!) SEE Can’t even take a compliment without getting emotional!!.SEE can’t even take a joke!...Rugbywife (who I can only assume to be lovely) of course I am and Eljay (Who is not only cute as a button (thank you David, it has been my lives ambition to be described in terms of haberdashery!)It’s a compliment, I like haberdashery , but funny AND smart,....ohhhh yeah AND very taken) via a comment left on my blog by Eljay … Can we leave this out....No we can’t,…facts is facts ma’am!~

. It was during a conversation with Eljay that I found something very telling about women,.....of course it will be something that I will forget when it is time to remember it,..but as of right now...I know it! Okay seeee there you go again,...you’re just pushing buttons..Strike through removed...
Perhaps this conversation brought home why so few men and women get on,..and so few can keep it that way,.....or maybe it clarified why I love women sooooo much. Eljay made comment that she has basically two rules.....what is acceptable for her behavior in her relationship and what is unacceptable for him (of all the topics we have discussed, usually ad nauseam, you have to select this one…without providing sufficient right of reply….and I am not about to justify my position herein as I have already done so with you!...hmmm private conversations….Good one David…your batting a thousand so far…going off you quite quickly – in loving way- your just like a brother to me honey…ROTFL (rolling on the floor laughing!!!)) See here we go with the emotions again, I repeat something you SAID to make a point,...you are not the first or last to say it and you get all pissy with me that this, of all comments,...... stuck...I know honey truth hurts sometimes - if I was pissy with you the silence would be deafening – next time I tender a comment I will be sure to append it with a suitably long pin / javelin to ensure the content has “stuck” ;-)). Anger issues, you have big BIG anger issues,...and anger is what??? WHAT???? I CAN’T HEAR YOU!! ITS EMOTION!!!! Kind of like flipping a coin and saying heads I win, tails you lose! Man this is sooo true across the board its not even funny. Fundamental views on the world I guess are so vastly different between men and women it’s a wonder they get along at all.....I am not gay,..but hell I can see WHY it happens....Gees or as you guys say CRICKEY (man, I love that word). we don’t say that !! that’s an Australian comment !! opps…that would be me…sorry Wifey It has been said and probably proven somewhere that men are logical and decide accordingly, where as women are emotional and decide accordingly. That my darling, is TOTAL BULLSHIT!!!! Too bad I am going to have to site studies,..and I thought you were a genius! Yeah…you might have got me there…bite me!
As I have dated on line I have noticed this very thing to be true. Women have their standards on what they accept to be good behavior from a potential mate,..but it’s a bit hypocritical. As I move around the online dating world I see a reoccurring theme. Most girls post in their profile, that they get along better with men than women. Err well DUH! Ya think? Yeah, I get along better with women. As I read profiles I see the same thing. Girls like to make note that they like to hang around men. Yeah! No kidding; for those that haven’t online dated. Now if a man put in his profile that he preferred to hang around women most, one of two things would happen,...he would either start having guys emailing him because its obvious he is sharing cross-dressing tips,...or girls would think he was a player in loose terms. Toughen up buddy and run through the pain!
It goes like this. I like being around women,..not for shopping (which I hate, major ditto!! So you hate answering the “Does my ass look fat in this question too? Hmmm isn’t the answer to that question the same as “So would you like to shag my very hot best friend!” I love to shop! Thank you Wifey,.....so there pfffft and POKE* and NO its not the same as the question would you like to shag my hot best friend....because with that question, you can say no and win points,...with the does my ass look fat in this,..no matter what you say will piss off the woman.....yes means I’m fat and you don’t like me and you’re a bastard and no means I’m a liar.....it’s los- lose and I usually just change the subject, this is a fact women,...and if you do not believe it ask your significant other,...unless you have been married for a while and then he will get a certain pleasure from telling you yeah,..your ass is gettin bigger for sure....but I digress ) or make-up tips (which wouldn’t help my sorry ass anyway since I don’t wear make-up). But, because I know how to make them laugh. Making women laugh will get you much booty for sure,.. (So, what your saying is “I like being around women so I can get laid!” – no fuking kidding Einstein!) Remember I am single dufus,... Oh yes …Mr..”I just want to find the love of my life”…given the choice between Ms Right and Ms Right NOW……well in my test subjects….what? well of course I tested my theory…test results proved conclusively that said subjects would opt for SOAS (Sex On A Stick) rather than HWUFPLTH (Hard Work Up Front For Possibly Long Time Happiness) (to see test results please apply to Rugbywife@gmail.com obviously privacy and disclosure requires will be standard…you may also be required to sign a confidentiality agreement.)…obviously getting laid is an issue and being funny is a method in which to achieve aforementioned shagging! You are killing me here this is exactly the argument. Although I must admit in some,...errr most cases you may be right! it will also get your face slapped, bounced out of a bars, and probably in a fist fight or two,...with a mouth like mine you either learn to run fast or fight good! I know how to soak up being one of the dudes they hang around with...if you are good enough looking they will talk about you when you are not around. There is no difference why women hang with men than men with women. Given my paraphrasing of your above argument as to why you like being around women…– obviously, I would have to disagree with your last statement! I spend time with my male friends because…Oh yeah… there my FRIENDS, I genuinely like their company, I don’t spend time with them to make them laugh in order to get them into bed…no doubt the boys will be greatly relieved to hear that! and just quietly…owww! At some point anyone of those men has thought about shagging you,..hate to break it and they may lie,..but be it beer wine,..or the fact you had good cleavage that night it has BEEN thought about,..at some point they may give up or perhaps you have hot friends,..since you think you might be the troll, (hmmm…nope … definitely not a troll!) but it was a generalized statement sooooo there is latitude in discussion … latitude! my ass…this is a key fundamental statement to this point of your debate! In addition the rest of your comment bears no relevance to the argument and is therefore just white noise! Can’t see the forrest for the trees, huh? Truth is everybody wants to be wanted and everybody wants their ego stroked. Its just a fact. OK I’ll give you that…only coz I kicked your ass so badly in the previous debate. What? You better bring you “A” game and that wasn’t it … all this AND still delusional!...Suck it up baby, its over…I hate to see a grown man cry…too much hanging with the girls funny boy! Sucking it up is not the issue here either,....just because you married the first man that could tolerate you (sniff sniff smell that?? That’s sarcasm attitude) doesn’t mean we all settle.....so like I said bring you’re “A” game,..because sticks and stones may break my bones,..but you’re a big fat dufus!!!! So there!! Where the difference lies is in actually dating. And the fact that women ALWAYS want to be around men. Debatable! Hmmmm not always true They will use cliches like “He ‘s like my big brother” Hmmmm wouldn’t want any of my male friends to be like my big brothers Crickey the last thing Wifey or I need is more brothers! It was a simile, you might like being around this guy when you are drinking because he is LIKE your brother,..geeees defensive are we? Honey … you don’t know our brothers…why do you think we’re over achievers at arm to arm combat – not to mention fast runners!! This was a FYI comment….easy daisy… if we’re drinking….a wingman or team leader is on point … not the brothers!!!! We try not to get arrested when possible! Now, this is code for I won’t sleep with him,..but if I get drunk and start a fight or get hit on by a man I am not interested in BIG BROTHER will stomp a mud hole in the poor sucker’s ass. Dude I don’t need a big brother to do that for me – I can take care of myself in a fist fight – have also been know to thump guys if they make inappropriate comments to me - Ditto…I’m just a little more subtle…it must look like an accident…lol! Then there is “Oh he’s harmless” or “just a friend” don’t sleep with my male friends at all never nada zip that is why the are friends That’s the point,...you think of them that way and only because they have other or know they can’t have you have they resigned to the fact,..unless you’re just fugly.....you can bet you crept into their mind at some point as a MAN I WANT TO DO HER....you keep them around because they make you feel good,..they enjoy you and get to stare at your assets and keep their flirt game up....not always true,...but someone in your bunch is that way,...bet on that,...again generalizations here. this is the sweet dude,..that listens to her whine and complain about boyfriends He is the one to watch out for, because he is usually friends with “Big Brother” and when you make her mad and she goes on a bender in a pub,..he is the one most likely to get action, and you will never be the wiser! He will console her, let her cry, keep buying the shots,..and ultimately is trusted enough to get her home safe...his place or hers.…quid pro quo! …sweet dude and big brother (little sister) roles are equally prevalent in both gender groups… mute point! Move on...Okay fair enough!
The plain truth is that women always keep their options open. David David David…we’ve discussed this … if you were any more open with your options you’d have to clone yourself honey!! Okay thats just funny no comment! Men, we could learn something from this,...if we were to compartmentalize like women can. A woman will always have someone standing in line behind you holding the next “now serving” number as if you were in a Delicatessen or Government office. She can and DOES get hit on in some aspect everyday,..and if open enough would get a number any time she showed a remote interest. Guys? This is just a fact, time we realize this. A women has her choice, men only have a chance!
If a girl has guy friends you are supposed to accept it,..since she is a girl (and gets on better with guys). But if you are a guy and say “honey,..I am going out with the girls tonight”,..you can expect your ass to come home to an empty house. To me this is funny,.....ummmm uhhh but not really. Now this IS an interesting point and one that could be very pertinent to you singleness!...Firstly…you shot yourself in the foot with your original argument as to why you like to hang with women…you completely debugged your own argument… great work David! Your tooooo easy…on sooo many different levels! Secondly…and this is just an observation but I see nothing attractive about a man who likes to hang with women - I don’t see that this would ever be on the list of characteristics that would attract me to a man! ... come on honey…honestly…you and I both know … your chromosome away gay! ROTFL!!!! Exactly my point silly,...its OK for women to hang around the opposite sex as “friends” but if a man does it,..something isn’t right..See 4th or 5th paragraph,.. and thank you for proving a point you debated,..talking about easy!!!! Sweetie…you conceded the point that you hang with women to get laid, defus! That’s means you could potentially quality as a “player”… you didn’t say “I hang with women as I enjoy the intellectual stimulation”…but I’m sure you do! In addition….and there is always an addition….your prima facie argument is that women’s “standards” are hypocritical…by conceding the player point you’ve kinda proven that their concerns may have some relevance in some cases!. This is a debate....you brought a knife to a gun fight! Good line…a bit old…but good nonetheless!

I like my men…you know…rugged and manly.. I’m not interested in some pussy who likes to hang out with girls…so to me…it’s a mute point…but this is from my personal perspective only - what say you real women? See here again,..you like your men (here’s where we need to add a definitions / glossary page – when I say men I am referring to significant other / potential victim as opposed to “the boys”)… you hang around with to be exactly what you would date? (if we hung around with men we wanted to date…why wouldn’t we be dating them?), you select them as friends based on their worthiness of dating, you wouldn’t date a big pussy, but he could be a great friend,.Yes … .you are saying that you select friends based on manliness, ahhhh No – I select partners by manliness… because its what you prefer,..now seeing as how you have been married so long, this doesn’t really apply to you since you already have a permanent basis for comparison,..but thank you for once again proving my point. Your loosing it now aren’t you! But herein lies the fundamental difference. Girls know if a guy is getting laid.....hmmm tell that to my friend who just found out her boyfriend of two years … was married! She still slept with him and she knew she would before he knew she would. Takes two tot tango, he had nothing to lose and apparently she thought she had something to gain,.....she knew when, he was just testing his luck since he DID have a back-up plan...errr marriage - that’s a bit obscure….but OK I’ll give you that – I think we may be talking at cross purposes here! …a guy can only guess,.....unless he is paying for it....(well don’t we all pay for it at some point both figuratively and literally)
Even Rugbywife isn’t sure of this theory as we have discussed it before, however its only because she doesn’t believe it. what don’t I believe in ? That you as a woman at least here in the states,..could walk into any place and sit down,..and if (and I know this is tough for you Wifey), had an open and approachable posture,...would have your choice of those that will definitely approach you,...we hunt,..you gather,..its in our genes......we look for you,...you decide who you keep,..c’mon don’t you ever watch David Attenborough?? All she has to do is walk in a place, where there might be potential mates. Set up camp. Have some open approachable posture. And wait. Last time that happened I met Gigantor and that was very funny for my friends but not for me sorry honey…I might have had hand in that…the one saying…”Hi..Gigantor. this is my friend Wifie”…it was all good until Monday! But yeah…again … really funny! See Wingman Within a few hours she will have as many phone numbers or conversations as she pleases. A man does this and unless he is SUPER HOT, will just appear as a lonely stalker seeking a victim. Yeap…I’ll give you that…
So with all this said, here’s my theory. Women are GOING to hang around men and probably prefer them to women, especially if they are single and even remotely like sports (they may actually like sports,..but its probably a man that turned her on to them,...man that was chauvinistic, wasn’t it? But alas probably correct in most cases…but that includes brothers…biological not metaphoric!). .hmmmmm I have always liked sport & tend to watch most of it with my sister Rule of thumb,..and that maybe true,...but what are you seeking on your own site????? Hmmmm? A Rugby Hubby for Rugby! And we both know that there are plenty of women who do not watch sports,..BUT will go to a sports bar to watch sports with men,..and have zero interest in it.It’s not like I have have not had them in my groups......Women can be ultra competitive with each other and this may cause bigger problems if single, barring the girl’s night out with her pals. If a women hangs out with another women it will be someone she more than likely feels either smarter than, prettier than, slimmer than, or more single than to make herself look better. Jesus…that’s fuked up…could it be true?…but it does explain why I have so many friends! LOL!!! You bastards! LOL!! Not true for me baby Women will surround themselves with men for protection from other men, nah not true for me (please see above – thank you, I’ll do it myself) I used the wrong terminology there,..hey not a professional by any stretch,....I think it WARDS off advances from others,..so that when you are watching the game,..you are not approached,..that can be intimidating,..otherwise you would watch it with your bunch of girls which you may,..but I have rarely run across a group (more than 3) girls watching a game by them selves,..there are always men involved in the group,..couldbe somebodies hubby too,..but the more men the better the likelihood of not being approached,..sometimes you got hat way for that reason! Towatch the game and that’s it!!! Thats was my poorly worded point. But, you still get to be with guys which will act like you are that way,..they may punch each other in the arms,..but won’t you,..SO NO you aren’t one of the guys,..even if you think you are....and may somewhat get treated that way,..you don’t get the full treatment..... to get told they are funny, sweet, pretty, and just general slap and tickle fun (harmless flirting).
Men take note,...you too can be one of these men, I mean someone has to do it. But if you do, pick the hottest women you can to hang around. It will increase your stature among competing females, because they will eyeball the women you are with (up and down and real catty like, which may get you some entertainment as the process unfolds). It also shows that you have no problems with women. Have you read what you’ve written!!!…you have serious issues with women honey…it’ll take a truck load of counseling to sort you out! In loving and supportive way! J So you are telling me women DO NOT SIZE EACH OTHER UP? Hell YES…we sooo do!…that’s when you know your looking hot…all men look… can’t help themselves… you get eye fuked by a women… you KNOW your looking HOT!! Biggest compliment you can get…apparently women do dress predominantly for other women…unless of course their slappers…This isn’t an issue, it’s the truth. Next time you go out,..sit where you can watch a woman on a date watch other women come in,..she will look at shoes, hair, make-up,..and sometimes even comment to her date about it....I have been on way tooooo many dates to say that this is not only a fact,..but a fact of life!! There will be the potential for a shag if you’re the sweet guy or the funny one, but it won’t last. Be the pal if you must, but be prepared. If she even remotely likes you more than a friend,..don’t expect her to hook you up with her friend, unless it’s the fat stupid one that makes her feel better. Women don’t share well. And don’t expect her to not smooch on some other dude in front of you either. Hot women will also help you dress better and have better hygiene, since it is inevitable that you want her in some sort of way (because we men are pigs). Ok …that’s funny! This will also increase you chances with other hot women. And it may inadvertently increase your chances with this woman too, especially if she sees other women interested in you. This is not fact,..just rule of thumb! So Dudes, find the hottest girl you don’t have a real chance with and hang out with her, it may not do your sexual health well, but in the long run it may.
In closing I say this: the battle of the sexes is lost at the first shot, women have half the money,..and all the poontang. Men are not seeking the other half of the money.....you do the math. If women can do their little tricks, then we must in turn do ours. It’s the only way we even get along. The first shot in this battle has been shot and men,..your damned lucky it didn’t take off your bow. Now shoot back! Good luck and happy dating....personally I think it sucks and will glad to be done with it. Mrs. Dating Dave, where are you? I would love to be Married Dave!
This should get me all kinds of comments and great debate with Rugbywife and Eljay....stay tuned in!
Dating Dave, reporting from State Side
Eljay you rock,..this was fun

David I could happily argue with you for hours…oh yeah…we already do that! Loving your work as always, funny boy.

Heeeeeyyyy above the term "Funny Boy" was used reference gay.....so I will assume this to be a double term and I AM actually funny as in HA HA funny..... ;-))

Well there you have it,...thought provoking?? Perhaps! Scientific? Doubtful! Full of insight into the fundamental difference between the sexes? You bet!!! I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed putting it togehter.......

Dating Dave

My Space Exploration...The Final Frontier

2006-04-13T11:00:00.000-05:00

Okay,...so I have been on MySpace for a week now....I have assembled a mostly funny profile,..with a little of everything. I have posted my pics and I have cruised around. This is more an expreiment than anything,..but it will give you insight into online dating.....MySpace, for those of you that do not know, was developed to help local bands get some air time and noticed. Initially the set up allowed for a band to post songs, their profile, their pics,..tour dates...posters, and so forth. The idea was that the general public could browse by genre or area to find local and house bands. It also was a chance for the bands to play some music outside of their tour area and without being on radio....MySpace evolved into a place for the general public to do the same....now all it reuqires is an email address and off you go. Since the site was designed with HTML in mind it is very workable and you can completely personalize it as you wish. MySpace name is perfect,..its like a cyber apartment. Postes on the wall,...music playing,...personality info,...wants,...likes and so forth...its kind of a cross between an online dating site, an apartment that you invite random friends to, and a view into your pysche. I love the idea,..but the internet is still what it is.....two dimensional. Meeting people this way is a bit unnatural,...but natural selection still seems to work. A hot picture will get you noticed, but a picture may get you passed by....I guess the same is true in a bar,..but there you have tone of voice and inflection in comments or when you ask to buy someone a drink. You have pherimones and the likes to assist you in finding a mate (for lack of a better term),...you have the option to be a little tipsy and ask someone who is tipsy to dance,..only to find out you went to the same high school in bar.....BUUUUUT MySpace has advantages that a bar cannot have. Like you can stare someone up and down and not get thrown out for being a perv by the 6'10" bouncer who's favorite movie is Roadhouse. You also get the advantage of knowing more by a simple read than you would in an hour of conversation based on what people put on their profile. As well the usually shy are not so introverted when separated from the world via Tri-W. Two nights ago for instance I could not sleep and at 4 a.m. I was able to cruise around "Trolling" wayyyyy after the bars we shut and not that you need the visual,..but I did it in my PJ's eating a frozen burrito (probably whyI was unable to sleep after that too!!!).
So to tell you what its like in simple terms is this. I am a pretty creative guy, pretty smart (although that may rarely be displayed here,..I have my moments). I think I put together a pretty decent page....a little salty, a lot funny, and just all around cool.....at least I think so,...but you never know what will turn another person off,...and without the benefit of seeing an expression or hearing comments from them,..you never really know what will turn someone away from answering your email or whatever....
So the experiment goes like this,....set up a good page....then do a search; much as you would on Match or Yahoo personals.....since this is free,...its definitely more diverse.....but with that said,...it also isn't singles exclusive,...and there are plenty of people seeking only friends that are involved in relationships or whatever....its a varitble plethora of people though,..much like a bar...you may still go home with a married woman,...who as it turns out is hot at 2 and fugly at 7...

Here is what has happened thus far......
I have emailed girls that I thought were attractive AND their profiles had things in common with mine so there is something to talk about like: is attarctive and likes outdoors or native to Jax or things like that:

Contact made by me via email # sent: 18

You can see if they read your mail or not, some read it then respond later,..I am guilty of this too, so it means nothing. It may be days before you are responded to.....so:

I have recieved thus far: 2 replies

Women are more bold here too,...so you get hit on sometimes by them....here is what I have found out during my online dating and mySpace adventures: Some women respond to little or few men,..but cruise around and pick who they want to talk to. They mostly do this because if you have tits and a profile up,..you're going to get mail from someone,..in most cases the box is full of them....everything from pervs and freaks to regular Joes. Its funny to hear these stories from women I meet. Guys do some really stupid shit here and on dating sites. A lot of dudes, take pictures with their shirts off or all cruched up like meatheads,..others send poems and virtual stalk....The ladies will do similar stuff especially when it comes to sexuality,..posting non-explicit, but revealing or erotic photos....I am sure they get the freaks and pervs to the max,..but they keep their profiles that way...but the dudes crack me up in some of the things they do.....

With that established, I get my share of drive-bys from women....so far in one week: 6

Two were so ugly I couldn't bear to even acknowledge them (Hey I may not get acknowledged for the same reason from some too). The balance of women contacting me all have kids...not what I am looking for, but I am open to it,..you just never know. I have been going back and forth with 2 of the remaining three,..one nearby,..the other about 50 miles away, both are attractive,..but I suspect the emails will cease soon. No email Chemistry with one and the other is very new to MySpace and as she gets other offers and so forth,....may move away from me to whoever else she contacted,...probably newly single as well, so is playing the field.

If you want to check out my MySpace the link is a couple of posts down,...yes you have to work for it.....

More to come.........

Happy Easter,..even to you heathens!!

2006-04-13T00:13:00.000-05:00

Big updates this weekend,..plus the guest blog is done. I will be posting a joint post with two CM's this weekend sometime....it came out WAYYYYY better than I thought it would,..and it completely evolved into a monster, a very, very funny monster. Thanks Eljay and Wifey,....you're not so bad for foreignors ;-)>

Finally Cubana update is mostly finished,....plus MySpace details........funny what you see online.......I will post examples.........
So lots of updates coming,....until then,...enjoy Easter,..take some time to reflect and spend with families.....Spring is upon us and love is in the air......just not my air apparently! All it does is make my allergies act up and I sneeze a bunch!!! At least a pill can cure that.......
See you next week with many posts!!! Plus Live blog!!!

DD

Is It Really "My"Space?

2006-04-11T05:15:00.000-05:00

Okay,..some situational updates,..since I have complete insomnia and have been up for 24 thus far,.....going to be a long day.

I emailed Nad (see a few posts back for details)to get the status from the other night. Just wanted to see if there was anything to her introducing me to Nf. Any answer was fine since I am taking a bit of a break. I get a rather snobby email back, saying that Nf went to see her boyfrined in Orlando over the weekend and "sorry",..and then she put in a personal note after I indicated that I thought she (Nad) was out of town. She said that she wasn't and I made a comment, that I should have called her (it was more out of politness) than interest in Nad (as I have said I already know her and I am not interested). But her response to this was rather shitty. She said her (Nad, the cock blocker's) boyfriend wouldn't like her talking to men and it was better that I didn't call. And that we wouldn't be emailing anymore.......Uhhhhhh okay....you grab my Wahoo and your boyfriend would be bothered by a call from a friend....okay,..well another set of bodies for the pile....you set'em up and I'll knock them down. Funny!

Okay almost done with Cubana post, its a long one. The other shoe has fallen with a thud.

Went back on MySpace... you can view it here
If you are a memeber,..feel free to say "hi". Not back on for dating purposes, I am doing some research,..but whatever happens happens. I made a good friend in Bellafiore that I met during my last brief stay on MySpace. As usual I will update here as breaking news happens...

Live blog will be from a place with Wi-fi on a popular night. I want to go and observe dating in action. I want to blog and watch people do the dance and report what I see as it happens....maybe see if being a player works "in real-time" I am sure I will "player" it myself, since it is my nature. It may take a me a few tried to get the blogging part right and finda good location,..but we shall see. Might try a place or two this week.

DD

MAN VS WOMAN (FUNNY....UMM NOT REALLY)

2006-04-10T16:06:00.000-05:00

The Other Night

2006-04-08T16:06:00.000-05:00

Well, the other night turned out to be pretty interesting.....M and I get there about the same time. So I ask for some recon on the woman Nad has decided to introduce me to. He tells me she is alright,...question #2..is she fat? Nope.....okay then rest is up to Cupid (Nad). So we walk in and there is a table full of people. Nad stands up and blocks M from siiting down where he intended,...which was next to her and across from her roommate (the victim). Nad made the introductions. We'll call her "NF" for Nad's friend. Nf was tall, slim, blue eyes, blonde hair, cute little librarian glasses, good smile,..and a pretty good personality. She was very nice and once the 6th pitcher of Margarittas arrived....she was getting even funnier......then a strange turn of events occured. Nad and I, even when we dated about 2 years ago, were always smartasses and very sarcastic to each other.....there was little chance of us ever going beyond friends because of this. We probably would have ended up killing each other. Tonight on the 11 o'clock news...a double murder on the southside,..man found with scissors in forhead,..woman found with duct tape on her mouth and nose, police say they are married,...no suspects! So her and I spend the bulk of the first hour, verbally assaulting one another,..much to everyone elses entertainment. It was quite funny. In the meantime though, I was trying to get a conversation going with Nf and also talk to M, who I haven't seen in years. She was fun to talk to and the conversation went easy enough,....except,...the more Nad had to drink,..the more flirty she was getting.....errrrr with me.....she was becoming touchy feely and kept putting her hand on my leg,....now being across from Nf I doubt she saw what was going on and that was probably Nad's intention. Nad is involved anyway,..so I blew it off....until I got fondled.......yep she flat out grabbed the boys,....YIKES......then the crowd thinned out a little and there was 5 of us at the table. Nad, M, Nf, and I, plus an older lady that was with the rest that left,..but she was having fun and wanted to stay.....Now M is married,..but thinks he is a player,..not as I put it in the blog,..but as it is in a dance club...PLAYER,....trying to get what he can where he can,...but he stops short of anything,...I think he just likes to stroke his own ego and see if he can still do it.....its funny if it wasn't so sad.....sometimes his wife gets pissed at him,..but most time she laughs.....anyway his wife wasn't there. So not only do I get "Cock Blocked" by him moving over to sit next to Nf, but I got Nad, doing it as well,..being much more obvious with her advances on me.....at some point tits came up in the conversation and Nad was showing me hers via two unbottoned buttons and a tug on the front....now I am not one to stare at tits,..but tits always seem to stare at my eyes....I just don't get it.....anyway....I look across the table and M is trying to feel up Nf,..who is so lit up by now,..she doesn't even care....I just laugh at M. Well it comes time to go and I am okay to drive, M is as well,...Nad had me worried,..and the 5th wheel was hoping Nad would take her home.....I drive Nf in her car to her and Nad's place. M follows us,..Nad takes home 5th wheel and eventually goes home. M drives me back to my truck and we joke about the night...fun stuff......
I call Nad on the way home to make sure she made it home,....she was just arriving...and asked if I liked Nf,...I said I did. She said she would look into getting her to go out with me and give me some recon.
Nf and I had a good, but inebriated conversation as I drove her home. I got a little back ground on her and learned a couple of things that may be of use later....she was very sweet and had a good disposition,....then again women are evil,.....and she was drunk,...so I may completely be wrong. I asked her if she was interested in going to a movie next week and she said yes,..but when I tried to get her number we were interrupted by M. I figured I would email Nad the next day and get the scoop as well as a number if Nf was interested. Nf apparently passed out and laid out of work the next day,..so I have yet to get the scoop. Nad and Nf both were going out of town separately this weekend so I have yet to get details or number.....so you know I will post it here.

Tonight the watering hole is having their monthly B-day party for people with B-days during the month. Mine is the 23rd......yep 36. Not looking forward to it actually and usually I enjoy b-days. This year is just another day. But tonight I am heading up the hole and getting my $10 free bar tab and have some fun. It has been one hell of a week and I have much to blog about,...as I said still waiting for another shoe to drop....I am not my normal chipper self and hung out by myself last night and basically trashed my apartment last night, like a bummed out bachelor. Lots of things on the ol noggin lately and not too happy with some of them or myself for them....but life goes on and maybe tonight I meet someone else to blog about....probably not though,..its always the same crowd,..however I did meet Cubana that way,..so who knows...

Also lately Nascar has popped back up again. She sent me an email detailing why she likes me and why she was sorry for being shitty to me and completely apologizes and explains everything...it was very telling and very eye opening,....we chatted a couple of times this week on the phone and agreed to meet today for lunch or something.....I know I am a sucker,..but as I have said I had a thing for Nascar and I also needed to clear my head of other issues....thought she might be a good way to do that. We have alwys talked well and there are usually plenty of laughs......I called her about 11:30 no answer,.....I didn't leave a message,..she rarely checks them anyway....I called back about 1 and left a message this time.....I tried again at 4 and got her,.....but she asked if she could call me back in 20....I said yes,.....she called me back and I ask what her deal is.....and there again I heard Nascar as she really is.....and suddenly it dawned on me.....her email to me was for her own conscience and not to explain shit to me....she is a user that likes to never quite let go,..play peoples feelings,..and keep them just close enough to wanting her that she retains some control.....I asked her what happened to lunch today,..and I get some lame excuse........I tell her it was her loss and asked her to never contact me again.....I have removed her phone numbers from my phone to prevent drunk dialing (and since they are programmed, I really don't know the number,..only her name shows up). I moved her email address to my spam blocker,..so Iwon't know if she does try to contact me,..and I have removed anything that reminds me of her.....last thing I said to her was,..you will now be a stranger to me.....if you see me,.... know that.......and YES I do mean it....done deal,..no looking back for DD.
I have today put to rest Nascar and she joins the pile of bodies,...like Gilf, Youngin, Thatgirl, Cubana, and anyone else I neglected to mention... now the slate is clean barring one small issue left to be decided regarding Cubana.....but it doesn't appear that is will ever be resolved....I am just giving it time.....we parted on good terms if thats what we call parting (am I leading you on about the post or what???)! So today is a new day....I cleaned up the beer cans and pizza boxes from the apartment floor. I put away dishes and finally did 3 weeks worth of laundry....I changed my sheets and the only thing left to do is take a shower and clear my head of the rest. Once that happens its back to the drawing board,..maybe back on Myspace,....maybe back on Match,..maybe back on both, maybe neither. The good thing about the watering hole is that these are my friends. And the committee Prez "K" will be there,....she finally knows the conclusion or lack thereof with Cubana....she has given her two cents and I think she is right...Most of the committee agrees,...somethings are just not going to work for outside reasons (as opposed to internal) and all but CM "Ames" and CM SIS "K" knows what happened....soon anyone reading will.....and I am sure the comments will fly. Some I told you so's,...will be in order.

Okay I will be in a better mood next post and we will be back at some fun.....I am not ready to be back on the horse yet. My arse still hurts from the fall,...but I am walking to the stables to check out the saddles (one with airbags this time, please!)...we shall see...this is EXACTLY why I say dating sucks....I suppose I should make the best of it I kind of have to.....

Special thanks to CM Eljay! You rock babe,..and you give great advice,..still adhereing to it by the way,...wish you were 8,000 miles closer,....you'd make an awesome "Wingman".

Next posts are going to be unique and I will be doing it live on location!!! I will explain later what that means and what I am doing, but it will be live dating.....I have a great idea....

Also Guest bloggers when they get unlazy will be posting....CM Rugbywife has been under the weather,..so I am simply waiting on her to feel well enough to write....

So long for now....
DD

Points Tally

2006-04-06T15:54:00.000-05:00

(Written by a man)
In the world of romance, one single rule applies to the men: Make the woman
happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she
dislikes, and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing
something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system
=============================
SIMPLE DUTIES:
You make the bed. (+1)
You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow. (0)
You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets. (-1)
You go out to buy her what she wants. (+5)
In the rain. (+10)
But return with beer. (-15)
You check out a suspicious noise at night. (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is nothing. (0)
You check out a suspicious noise and it is something. (+5)
You pummel it with an iron rod. (+10)
It's her pet. (-25)
=============================
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS:
You stay by her side for the entire party. (0)
You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college
buddy. (-2)
Named Tina. (-4)
Tina is a dancer. (-10)
Tina has breast implants. (-80)
Really big breast implants. (-200)
=============================
HER BIRTHDAY:
You take her out to dinner. (0)
You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar. (+1)
Okay, it is a sports bar. (-2)
And it's all-you-can-eat night. (-3)
It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can-eat night, and your face
is painted the colors of your favorite team. (-10)
=============================
A NIGHT OUT:
You take her to a movie. (+2)
You take her to a movie she likes. (+4)
You take her to a movie you hate. (+6)
You take her to a movie you like. (-2)
And it's called "Death Cop". (-3)
You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans that was
featured on "Oprah". (-15)
=============================
YOUR PHYSIQUE:
You develop a noticeable potbelly. (-15)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it. (+10)
You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy
Hawaiian shirts. (-30)
You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-10,000)
=============================
ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION:
She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5)
[Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT you say.]
You hesitate in responding. (-10)
You reply, "Where?" (-35)
Any other response. (-20)
=============================
COMMUNICATION:
When she wants to talk about a problem, you listen, displaying what
looks like a concerned _expression. (0)
You listen for over 30 minutes. (+50)
You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV. (+500)
She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep. (-5,000)

Accidental Set-up?

2006-04-06T14:20:00.000-05:00

For the last couple of weeks I have been reconnecting with friends and buddies. When you date and you go from one potnetial long term to another,..you spend most of your time with those people and thus the friends,..most of which are married and you have to schedule an appointment with anyway...get kicked to the side a bit. This has been the case with me... and them....I have the best freinds in the world.....from best buddies to committee members. I can say that all of us can go weeks, months,..even years and when we see or talk again...its like there is no gap,...just catching up on news. I am hanging with one of the best buds Friday night....first time since the camping trip in October...should be a blast.
Today I swing by a contractor's place.....indirectly a customer of mine,...I have another good friend that works there,..but he and I haven't spoken in well over a year. Again same thing. When I was full time involved and living with my significant other at the time,..we would hang out with him and his wife. It became a Sunday tradition to watch the races on Sundays and eat, drink, be merry! But after I became single again and began dating and so forth we let the friendship kind of fade out. My other did not retain it at all,...but I tried to...it was just difficult. He and his wife are always into something and busy and of course I was dating....right before we parted ways, he and his wife set me up with a girl he works with, we'll call her Nad.
Nad and I went to a baseball game together with them and had a blast....we got on well and seemed to make fast friends....especially when you throw $1 beer into the mix. She was still hung up on her ex though and most times cancelled our dates and later I found out it was becuase she was trying to repair things with him...I was the back-up plan....you women always have one for sure.....just like us dudes call our ex's for booty calls.....see They're Back Pt II in the archives for clarification if needed....
Anyway,..I swing by to see him today,..and I ask about her....he calls her down to his office and we all get a good laugh over those times in our life about 2 years ago....and how much things have changed....She tells "M" that she sent out the word for beers after work and asked if he was going...he said he was going to try,..then she asked me to go....I know now that she is fully involved with someone,..but thought what the hell it could be fun,..I haven't seen "M" in a long time and Nad was always fun to be around....plus these folks are indirectly customers so I can write off the whole hang out.....good, good, and good. So I said yea!
Again I have been reconnecting with friends so two birds with one stone as they say. It will get me back on the call lists. After we all agree when and where,....Nad brings up "who" (as in who is going) and her face lights up.....she says you know I really liked you and I have no idea why I didn't think of this before.....My best friend moved here from Tallhassee late last year.....you two would probably get along great AND she is single......I can't wait to call her she says.............
ARRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGG...not looking for a date...still tieing up lose ends on several things as it is,..and still need to post all that has happened for the last two months....soooooo no there is no pressure since there will be several of us.....and I am there to see "M" anyway. Nad will surely do the introduction thing and has even emailed me since I saw her this morning.....I will blog the results tonight.....thus is dating...even if I am not technically dating right now.

Ok, Cubana post are coming and they top any story on the blog.....without question. There are still a few things to hammer out,..that will be able to fill in very pertinent details, I need those details to make some of this make sense,..so I have to wait..believe me you'll understand why later. Just remember, Dave never does whats good for him and often times is an idiot,..especially when it comes to the opposite sex. I should be able to post it all by the end of the month....I like there to be a cooling off period in case something comes up.....and I don't like to post while there is still something (friends or otherwise going on still),...its just not fair and would more than likley get me castrated if they find out I am giving details while they are still around). Most women I date know nothing of the blog...CM Eljay asked me this the other evening and I explained that if they did,...I wouldn't be able to post honestly for fear of them reading it....if for some reason they find out I will ask them NOT to read it,..since it may damage things for myself and them,...and I also don't want them to think I post details about them that should be left alone......the only ones that get that treatment are those that are bat-ass crazy or we part on bad terms....I think it is just better this way.....interested in comments on this issue though,..so post away or email me.

Confusion!!!!!

2006-04-04T13:24:00.000-05:00

Okay,....so I blame something on Eljay that rightly belonged to Rachel,...and Rachel didn't do it in the first place,..even though she masks all of her information so I have no idea where she is from..... and it was totally not as I explained,..but honestly thought it was....I have been called out.....DAMMIT I hate when that happens......this is soo confusing.........are you confused now????
Okay see I thought Eljay and/or wifey did a driveby,...but in fact it was Rachel,....and Rachel although she did a drive by,..she had her name (if thats her real name hehehehehehe) posted. So what i thought happened didn't and what did happen happened differently then I said,.....so Rachel,...you're right! Not about what you said per say,..but how you did it and the fact it was you.....
Eljay and Wifey,..shit it took me until last week to almost ALMOST prove to myself you two are different people.....AND which one is which......gees I need a vacation!
So, sorry Rachel.......Sorry Eljay and Sorry Wifey....anybody has any question put it in the complaint box!!!

Rachel what State are you in at least???

Guest Bloggers Coming......

2006-03-31T15:59:00.000-05:00

I want to try something a little different starting next week....the two new committee members and I are in negotiations for guest blogging.....I may combine their posts or post the separately,...but Wifey and Eljay will be posting something here soon....I want a little different perspective on dating....

The story goes like this.....I get a snotty comment from Eljay (she's married) about my indescisiveness reference the women I date,...We'll call this a "drive-by" because the chicken posted anonymously....Som I attempted to lure out the poster with a follow up post regarding my indescisiveness ,...and it worked,...out Eljay came with her name tag on and steam spewing out of her ears.....since then I have toured her blog and realized that dating is about the same all over,...barring Dowries and cow offerings........How did I come to this conclusion, you ask?....well lo and behold I check out RubyWife's blog and Eljay and Wifey started to chronicle Wifey (not married but looking,..must be a NZ thing) dating experiences as she tries to find a husband......whats even funnier is that they both reside in New Zealand!!! So over the last week or so,..We have been emailing back and forth and joking about dating and life in general,... Wifey (aka Rugby Wife.... because she wants a hubby for Rugby Season and then some) is single and Eljay has become her faithful wingman,..she even refers to herself as such!..... We have all become fast friends.....so this is actually quite hilarious....so keep looking out for the guest postings from these two I won't censor them so it could be amusing....we are still deciding what to post on,..but I can assure you it will be funny,...these two are hilarious!!!

Some Fun

2006-03-27T20:31:00.000-05:00

Sex I.D. Find out how your mind works!

Some researchers say that men can have 'women's brains' and that women can think more like men.

Find out more about 'brain sex' differences by taking the Sex ID test, a series of visual challenges and questions used by psychologists in the BBC One television series Secrets of the Sexes:

* Get a brain sex profile and find out if you think like a man or a woman.
* See if you can gaze into someone's eyes and know what they're thinking.
* Find out why scientists are interested in the length of your fingers.
* See how your results relate to theories about brain sex.

Go HERE to take The Brain Sex Test.....I have saved my score to compare,...its from the BBC

Fun stuff

New Blogger Buddies

2006-03-27T12:51:00.000-05:00

The two new Committee members have been added and their blog linked on the right....once you see Rugywife's blog,..you'll know why her and Eljay have been added to the the committee,...you'll have to go to the archives there to get the full story,..but sounds like her and I are on the same mission....what better way to win the battle than to ally with someone going through the same things? Stop by their blog and tell them Dave sent you.....

Okay COMMITTEE Updates

2006-03-27T12:15:00.000-05:00

After being bashed and beaten by my sweet Kina after publicly firing her,....I have had a change of heart.....and since I do adore her,..I will keep her on the Committee,..since she has proven her worth once again.....and I am officially inducting Wifey and Eljay! The latter two are going to be advisers on all that is evil......they seem to have a penchant for such things and besides I have little doubt that when I need an ass kicking......it will come from them to the same extent it comes from Sister "K" and Special "K" both committee members.....
Special "K" came through for me this weekend both Friday and Saturday......but especially Friday....neither I nor she is at liberty to discuss it RIGHT SPECIAL K????,..but lets just say she got my ass out of a big sling on Friday,....and for that she is being promoted to Committee President and is being awarded The Valor in Combat medal,..since she was called via emergency into action to be a temporary wingman and performed heroically, ontime,...and without regard for her own safety ;-))
So thanks to you Special "K" hereby known as Chief "K". Alright, back to business....there are still updates to be done Re: Cubana,..but the other shoe has yet to drop.....then I will fill you in. After the likes of Thatgirl and NASCAR,..I have decided to clean my slate and start a fresh, after a respite through spring.....I need the break. I am retreating, regrouping, and rearming for dating battle......as of today I have made 4 new freinds and they have turned out to be specatacluar people including "Bellafiore",..but no one stands out as what I am looking for above all others....sooo suffice to say, I am just going to remain a "Player" for a while and see what develops.....until then,...I am hapily enjoying the not having to deal with all crap dating brings.....between Thatgirl and Nascar...enough is enough.....I doubt that I will go back on Match either.....so...there will be filler here for a little while as I relegate myself to being single until the troops are ready for battle......

New Committee Member(s)

2006-03-23T00:48:00.000-05:00

Since Kina (my favorite Aussie) was shitcanned for saying her job was too hard.........as a member..she has been replaced by not one but two (one pending approval,...yeah Wifie you are not the only one with standards),..Rugby Wife however,..has already won the open spot. She like most CM's is married.....thus possessing the ability to actually tolerate someone night and day,..a trait I am learning apparently...more to come!

Great Article

2006-03-21T20:25:00.000-05:00

I am probably violating various copywrite laws,..but hey....sue me...okay not really.....If I get a complaint I will remove the post. I have provided all credit and blah blah blah.
Anyway the article is great and I have both witnessed and been a part of these rituals. In fact I still am....funny because I learned this long ago from Zoologist Sir David Attenborough. He did a series of videos on Humans, from conception to death and all the mating in between. Very very insightful,..if ou ever have the opportunity to see it, I recommend it highly,..plus David has that cool older British accent that makes him very easy to listen to as an authority. Anyway.....on to it:

Mating Rituals Decoded

Brought to you by Judy Dutton and Match.com!

When it comes to flirting in the hopes of finding The One, what works? The direct approach, "Hey, I couldn't help but notice your beautiful eyes"? Subtle glances? Playing hard to get? These were among my questions as I headed out on a field trip with Dr. Helen Fisher, a professor of anthropology at Rutgers University, and the author of Why We Love: The Nature and Chemistry of Romantic Love. Dr. Fisher has devoted her career to understanding human mating rituals--and her knowledge applies perfectly, she added, to today's pickup scene. "Even in this modern age, humans adhere to courtship strategies that are as old as the hills, and used throughout the animal kingdom," says Fisher. And that's why she and I headed out for a night of cafe- and bar-hopping, to observe what works (and what doesn't) when it comes to mingling and the human mating call. Six hours, two coffee shops, and one--or was it two?--bars later, we had some interesting findings. Come along with us as we make the rounds--and learn!

Destination #1: The classic coffee bar for flirting how-to's
Our first stop: Starbucks. To me, the woman in the green shirt is sipping a cappuccino and catching up with friends. But in Dr. Fisher's eyes, something much more primordial is happening: The woman in green is on the hunt, and has already staked out her quarry--a tall man in a blue-checkered button-down sitting next to her.

"See how her body's twisted toward him in the 'crouch' position, with her hands near her face when she laughs?" Fisher whispers to me as she sips her chai latte. "It's the 'broken wing' tactic. She's sending a subtle signal his way that says, 'protect me.' Men love that."

Indeed, Fisher says that secret signals of sexual attraction are at work whenever people mingle. The way you sit down with your cappuccino or Corona begins the courtship dance. "The first thing all animals do when attempting to find a mate is to set up their territory," says Fisher. People who place laptops on their table or their coat and bags on a chair next to them, she explains, are attempting to carve out a perimeter so they can proceed to the next stage of courtship: attracting attention.

"Notice how that guy's stirring his drink with his entire arm?" Fisher points out. "He'd never bother to do that at home." The man then casually stretches his arms back in a gesture Fisher calls the "chest thrust" to appear as large and formidable as possible. "Pretty much all courtship postures fall into two categories: attempts to look big and attempts to look little," she explains. Traditionally, men generally try to look big, or "loom," while women try to look small, or "crouch." The direction someone's feet are pointing can also convey interest: Smitten women turn pigeon-toed; men pivot outward. "Feet can be a real giveaway," says Helen. "People are quite conscious of their body and hands, but forget to control their feet."

So, how do hopeful singles transition from a "loom" or "crouch" to an actual pounce? For women, Fisher suggests trying the tried-and-true "five-part flirt." "You catch someone's eye, cock your head to the side, raise your eyebrows, look down, then away," she explains, adding that women are usually more socially adept than men and thus better at initiating courtship. But at some point, she conditions, a transfer must happen: In other words, the man has to pick up the ball and make his move.

Destination #2: A quirkier coffee bar for connection lessons
Dr. Fisher and I decide to move along to a coffee bar with more of a lounge-around atmosphere. Here, we observed some more mating rituals: "See those two girls over there? I think they want to be picked up," Dr. Fisher says, nodding toward two bubbly twenty-somethings in cool, dressed-down clothes and knit caps, who are sitting in the corner of Grey Dog's Coffee. While hardly dressed to impress, the two young women are nonetheless employing a different courtship strategy called "handicapping." "They're saying, 'I'm so cool I don't have to show off,'" Dr. Fisher explains.

While four men seated nearby can?t help but notice the two giggly girls, no one works up the guts to break the ice, and their reluctance is understandable: After all, what can you say to a complete stranger that won?t come off as corny? Fisher suggests trying questions ("Excuse me, do you know a good place around here to grab dinner?") and compliments ("That's a great laptop case. Where'd you get it?") since both require a response and get you engaged in the next stage of courtship: "grooming talk." "It's called 'grooming talk' because it really doesn't matter what you say," Fisher says simply. "If someone's interested in you, they'll keep talking."

As the conversation heats up, a behavior called "mirroring" can kick in, says Dr. Fisher, furthering the connection. When mirroring, couples sip their coffee or cross their legs in unison, subtly mimicking each other's movements. "It's a very powerful way to develop rapport, since it actually helps your brain waves get in synch," Dr. Fisher explains.

Singles should also keep an eye out for "intention gestures." "Basically that means the other person wants to touch you, but since they're not sure if you're receptive, they'll rub their own arm or leg," says Fisher.

We notice a couple in the corner, plying each other with forkfuls of cake. This is more mating in action, says Dr. Fisher. To further forge a bond, couples may engage in "courtship feeding"--each offering the other a sip of tea or a bite of food. "Nuptial gifts of food are common among many animal species," Dr. Fisher notes. "When a male chimpanzee offers a female a piece of sugar cane, she'll copulate with him and then eat the sugar cane. Humans don't move that quickly, but we all know there's no such thing as a free lunch!'

While both men and women respond similarly to many courtship cues, one area where they're wired very differently is eye contact. To prove her point, Fisher gestures towards a man who's moved his chair so he can sit next to a woman rather than across from her. "That's because while women gain intimacy from face-to-face interactions, men would rather avoid it--they find it uncomfortable, even invasive," she explains. The reason for this dates back to the dawn of mankind, when males were forced to face their enemies, but sat side by side with their friends. It's also why, these days, men love nothing more than sitting at a bar with their buddies watching the Rams vs. the Redskins, while women love nothing more than staring into their amour's eyes over a candlelit dinner. "When couples fight over these types of differences, they're also fighting millions of years of evolution," Dr. Fisher explains. "Men and women are fundamentally different in many ways, and nothing's going to change that overnight."

Destination #3: A busy bar on Friday night for the laws mating
We decide to see how the courtship dance looks when in a more "intense" pick-up environment--a bar called Peep. As we sit down, Dr. Fisher points out that clearly, the couple sitting next to us is in love. They're mirroring each other's movements, "courtship feeding" off each other's cocktails, and displaying other tell-tale signs of a honeymoon period. Even so, their mating dance is far from over, says Dr. Fisher. At this point, keeping the person they've got, or "mate guarding," becomes a priority, and this pair illustrates this principal perfectly. "Now, normally the man would offer the woman the seat against the wall to signal he's protecting her," says Dr. Fisher. "But in this case, he's in the back seat and she?s sitting facing him with her back to the room. It could be due to what she's wearing."

The clothes in question? A camisole with a plunging neckline that, had the woman been seated facing the crowd, would have probably had every guy in the vicinity eyeing her. "By dressing that way, she's asking to be mate guarded," Dr. Fisher explains. "And maybe that's why he took the back seat: so she attracts less attention."

Such displays of possessiveness are hardly unnecessary or "Neanderthal," as some people might put it. One recent study found that 60 percent of men and 53 percent of women admitted to "mate poaching," a practice of stealing partners who are already taken. While it's distressing to think that someone we love could be so easily ensnared by new prospects, Dr. Fisher points out that a little competition also pushes us to become more caring, attentive, and in short, better mates.

In fact, as we look across the bar, we see this principle in action: a woman in a slinky tank top, jeans, and stilettos who's flirting with two men. "She's giving them equal attention," Dr. Fisher notes. "Since she obviously hasn't made up her mind which one she likes, both of those men are working really hard." We head home before finding out which man, if either, wins in the end. But it gets me wondering: Does courtship really boil down to winners and losers? Is the game of love really that cutthroat rather than warm and fuzzy? "The game of love is not nice," Dr. Fisher says, "but then again, you're playing for the biggest stakes in town. Nothing is so important." And after listening to Dr. Fisher call the play-by-play on our night out on the town, I feel like my skills are definitely ready for the high-stakes game of romance.

Judy Dutton is the executive editor of Happenmag.com and lives in Brooklyn, NY, and has contributed articles to Women's Health, Redbook, Cosmopolitan and other national magazines.

On A Lighter Note

2006-03-20T08:37:00.000-05:00

I got this in an email today.....Friends!

Friendship between the sexes

Friendship Between Women:
A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her
husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his
wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew about it.

Friendship Between Men:

A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that
he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's
10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and
two claimed that he was still there.

HEHEHEHEHEHE Yeah, that's pretty funny

Life is Short

2006-03-20T08:21:00.000-05:00

Over the weekend I kind of had a personal moment or two. Simply reflecting on what I have and have not achieved in my life. It was kind of strange because there was no real reason to have a moment like that,..but either way I did. I began to kind of evaluate where, who, what, when, and why. Nothing really in depth,..but there comes a time when you have to more clearly define your goals and define yourself. When you have to look at the things you have done or HAVE NOT done and decided what is still doable and what shouldn't have been done. I talked with several friends this weekend. Some that I had wronged or had been not so good of a friend to. I didn't call them to make amends or anything in depth,..I did however call them and say "hi" and tell them that they came across my mind and I wanted to call them. Its amazing that in good friendships you can go days, months, even years without talking,..but when you do speak again,..you remember why you were friends in the first place. It great to talk with these people this weekend.
Personally, I need to do some house cleaning of my own. The only conclusion I came to this weekend, was simply that unlike usual, my head is completely not screwed on tight right now. I need to get back into my groove. Between dating crazy women,..and meeting wonderful women and in some cases trying to please both or stay away from some or whatever,..I have lost track of my own place in this world. I think that I discovered that things do matter. You cannot gloss over the details or skip them, you can't cut corners. Most of all,........you have to seize the day,....Carpe Diem! There are things that I beat myself up over,..there are things I beat others up over, there are things I neglect and things I want to do. This blog will remain funny, but there will be moments like this where I have to just kind of lay it out.
Today is Monday, and when I walked into my office, while on the phone with a friend, I found a letter on my desk from one of my customers. One of their employees, that I have known for almost 20 years, died Saturday! I think this made it all hit home. Life is short! Godspeed "B"!

Bad Break-Ups (funny)

2006-03-16T09:10:00.000-05:00

The Player

2006-03-15T23:47:00.000-05:00

Well the entire Player thing is very interesting. I have to agree with Robert Fulghum CLICK HERE.
I am amazed with the shear amount of players. Once I started this effort of finding players and non-players, I have met some very interesting folks and heard some of the best lines. If I was to guess players v non-players, I would say there are easily more players than non-players probably 60-40. I am still having fun with this.....a short list. Elderly hostess at Cracker Barrel hostess,.....got offered a ride back to Jacksonville from Palm Coast. Stan the Server, foreign and not a player,..maybe it was lost in translation. Teller at my personal bank,..not a player, teller at my Business bank, we almost switched jobs for a half day today, but it was a lose lose for me...Player! Check out girl at Publix,..NOT A PLAYER and now thinks I am crazy,..Bag boy? Totally Player and offered to work on her for me or beat her up. Funny Stuff I urge all of you to read the post reference above and just try it......it takes nothing, but wanting to have a little fun and I must sayIi have been more surprised by the return comments than I have by the amount of players. If it wasn't so late I would post some of the details,..but since I am tired and it is late you will just have to go with this synopsis,...but I am having so much fun with this,...there will be plenty to post.

There are some new options as of this week,....Still have the Cubana option but there is a huge (HUGE) "but" involved. Have another option that is new......We'll call her dimples. Don't know much yet and there are "but's" involved of course, but enough value to see what happens,..playing it by ear here. She knows who she is and may not speak to me, since she reads the blog.......come to find out......

JimmieJo (also a reader and big sweetie) is awesome, just at a very different place in life than me,...but she is a total player and I have neglected her this week as much as I have the blog, I probably owe her lunch and a Nascar race over wings. I'll e-you by the time you read this.....JimmieJo...you know who you are. Storm and Juls entirely too flighty, relegated to the recycle bin several weeks ago not worth a mention beyond this...........just looking for free meals and ego stroking, there are plenty out there like that, and they got neither from me, but both were Players and that's how we met.

A Special Thanks to the Committee

2006-03-15T23:25:00.000-05:00

I have some of the best friends a person could have,.....and this includes my Committee girls and honorary member and former wingman T-bone. T-bone is also a committee member husband and best friend of mine. Over the last 6 months (today is six months) I have logged over 1,200 unique visits to this site, even an ex girlfriend who found it. Since I started this new visible site meter, less than a month ago, there has been 691. Some don't leave comments, some do. Some just email me since they know me so well. But, the Committee is just plain awesome. Wendy (who won't post a comment) talks with me on the phone all the time and provides me with my spousal like support, for both work and personal (she is also a colleague of mine). Thanks to Karen, who has no problem telling me about her ass or mine.....thanks for the hook up sista,..at least you help provide options sometimes...sorry I have been ignoring you and thanks for the NCAA tix.....Go Gators! Thanks, SIS......we may not talk much on the phone or email,..but we both know where we stand....thanks for the comments,.you are my most reliable asskicker.....Amy,.......if T-bone messes up,..you and I are getting hitched,...you rock......famous words from Amy ("WOMEN ARE EVIL, WOMEN ARE EVIL,...REPEAT THIS MANTRA"!) You REALLY want me to have kids and all I can say is "WOMEN ARE EVIL WOMEN ARE EVIL" Kina, has been unassed from her committe seat. She decided trying to figure out relationship drama was too hard and that I just have bad luck and there is no cure for that!!!! Cheri, gets to hear most in person or by phone and therefore has no reason to read.....She gives advice that makes Dr. Phil look like a hack (he is a hack and I want to smack him). Then there is the wingman Timaa,...After a year plus of dry spell he has finally landed himself one...good going Timaa. I guess my wingman has been grounded,...but grasshopper learned well and his training complete. Those who cannot do teach......I teach.....So thanks to all......six months later and your comments and ass beatings have kept me going.......sooooooooo back to posts......

His and Her Diary (funny)

2006-03-15T23:21:00.000-05:00

HER DIARY

Saturday night I thought he was acting weird.

We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with
my friend all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I
was a bit late, but he made no comment. Conversation wasn't flowing so I
suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he
kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong and he said nothing.
I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had
nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept
driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say I
love you too.

When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing
to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched T. V. He seemed
distant and absent. Finally I decided to go to bed.

About 10 minutes later he came to bed and to my surprise he responded
to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that he was distracted
and his thoughts were somewhere else. I decided that I could not take it
anymore and I wanted to confront him with the situation but he had
fallen asleep.

I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don't know what
to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life
is a disaster.

HIS DIARY

Played a horrible game of golf today. Shot a 97. Can't putt for shit.

Got laid though.

Thanks CM (Wendy)

Indescisive??

2006-03-12T15:19:00.000-05:00

A comment was left this a.m. to Bommerang post,..you can go down and read it....I thought I might say something and get opinions, although I know what some of the opinions already are....
I am not indescisive,.....in regards to who I want in my life,..but I have never been one to date multiple people either. Being that I have not ever been able to date multiple girls I would settle for settling,...now I will not settle for anything. I have tried to broaden my horizons and date as many people as I can until one stands out,..when that happens they get my focus if its mutual...I have yet to find that except as noted here,..but I have expanded my circle of potential partners exponentially. Meaning the more options I have. I want to settle down, not settle.....settling for half assed or not quite what I want has never been me...both personally and professionally. Right now I have the means to seek out more potential mates and am doing so. Some it doesn't work out with, some have become good friends,...others I have been focused on. So, I guess this begs to ask.....anyone here,.....should I not keep ALL of my options open? Thanks anonymous, you may help out quiet a bit regarding my indescisiveness...

Boomerang

2006-03-11T08:45:00.000-05:00

Over the past couple of weeks I have been getting calls from Paula (NASCAR). Even after all I have said to her, she just keeps coming back. I really did like her a lot and obviously she liked me,...but when you just break up with someone, like she did with me.....its expected that you won't come back.....but she just keeps calling me. I have given her ample chances to do the right thing,..but she just won't admit, that she is still hung up on her ex and now apparently me....I cannot play this game. The other night she called and I think we finally settled it....and I do not expect to hear from her again,....but I didn't expect to hear from her the last 5 times either. Truth is, that she is in a very bad place in her life,.....I am not! I have to leave it at that.
What I find so interesting is that she berated me over Thatgirl turning back up all the time and calling, drivebys........and so on,....yet now she is doing the same thing....I mean at some point she thought I was still seeing Thatgirl because she kept turning back up,....now she is doing the same thing.....I guess she ought to know by now,..that since I am not seeing her after she dumped me,..that I was also not seeing Thatgirl when SHE dumped me as well.....Women are so indescisive,..they want, they don't want, they love, they don't love.....good God, no wonder so many men are single....
Cubana is staying with me this weekend.....going well, but there is still that"BUUUUUUUT...." that will be in the update.....more coming

More History of Dating Dave

2006-03-10T15:24:00.000-05:00

Some of the folks that read this blog, have emailed me or commented that there is no way that all of these things can happen to one guy.....Well, just to prove it is so.....I am going to tell you about the oddest date I have been on and again this goes back to highschool. These things are not so unusual to me, since they have been happening ever since I started dating. This IS EXACTLY why the blog was perfect......so again we go back in the time machine to 1988....Senior Prom.
It was about two weeks before the prom and I had no date, this was typical,..but I also went to more proms than most people,...not because 12th grade was the hardest four years of my life or anything,..but simply because I dated girls from other schools....in total I guess I went to 5 differnt proms, three for my school and 2 for others....from 10th to 12th grades. But my Senior Prom was the oddest. I met this young lady Heidi, about two weeks before.....her and I hit it off for whatever reason and I had found my prom date. She was a little cutey too. Blonde Hair, big blue eyes and very voluptuous for our age.....she was a pretty good girl,..but I thought maybe I had a shot for post prom trying to get some.....yeah men learn to be pigs at young ages....besides thats what proms were for weren't they,..that and some stupid pictures that cost you half a weeks pay, right?
Anyway,....the night of the prom, I get all dressed in my rental tux (oooh actually I actually owned that tux) and headed to her place to meet her parents and get pictures taken and what not. I arrive and her folks were very nice,..they lived near another highschool, in fact the one that my dad graduated from. She went there as well. I met her dad first and her Mom took off to get the camera....so we chatted with her dad. Her mom came back and started directing us where to stand and so forth. All the while she kept giving me this look....this look like I know you! But nonetheless she kept snapping pics...after a few minutes she asked me "What was your name, again?" (Yeah I have heard that from plenty in my life time,..but my dates Mom???) Well after I told her she says my last name again,..and told us to hold on,..she disappeared for a few,..then comes back with some photos, black and white photos.....It was of her at a prom,...and sure enough standing next to her was my Dad,..she was his date to his senior prom....there was much laughing and I guess the nuts don't fall far from the tree do they....?
Are we starting to establish a pattern here? Perhaps I am destined to be single forever,...but you can bet if I meet and marry someone,....it will be one hell of a story! Just thought I would share this one,..while I am waiting for the other shoe to drop with Cubana.....I will be seeing her this weekend after shooting myself in the foot last Wednesday,...we'll see how it goes and if I can recover with grace..............

ODE TO A BAD FIRST DATE

2006-03-09T11:25:00.000-05:00

So until I complete the Cubana update, which is still developing anyway,....I thought I might pass along a dating story that really set the stage for the rest of my dating life.....so into the time machine ye faithful and lets go back to big hair, stupid rockbands, rolled up jean bottoms, and 1986. I was in 10th grade and had just gotten my drivers license.
I was lucky enough to be at the perfect age just in time for my dad to repalce my mom's 12 year old car. There wasn't any value in it for trade and he was just plain tired of taking my pimple faced ass to work everyday. So, I got lucky and was given a 1974 Ford Maverick, it was a hoopdee for sure,..but since it was small I called it a Coupedee. Perfect party car, you could cram at least 8 highschoolers in it and a six pack of wine coolers or beer (the only thing we could buy from the Indians that ran the convienience store). As much as I hated that car,..I loved it. It symbolized freedom.....it was all that was great about being 16. Driving to school, going on dates, going to parties with less fortunate un-mobile friends....When you are 16 and not everyone has a car, your popularity goes up exponentially.......
So, I meet this girl,...I think her name was Jenny and I don't really remember how we met. We didn't go to the same school, but we met either way. I finally asked her out and we agreed that I would pick her up Friday night at 7 and meet her parents too. Fine by me! I was a good kid, full time student, and had two part time jobs. I dressed okay, since one of the jobs was working at The Gap,....my clothes were certainly presentable to parents....no "Fuck War" shirts or things like that.....So, I leave my house very excited,..she was cute as hell, blonde hair blue eyes.....slim and tall as was I. She lived in a swanky neighborhood about 10 miles away, so off I went. As I got to her neighborhood, reading directions to her place from what I had scribbled on a scrap of paper,..then the bottom falls out,....no not on the Maverick,...but from the sky. I mean raining like Noah was building an ark again....Just so we are clear....a 1974 Maverick was not known for having awesome windshield wipers!!!...and since it was the middle of summer,......in Florida,..... it was a humid 94 degrees.....a Maverick was also not know for its AC and mine had none,..so I had to roll the windows up to keep from getting drenched by the rain,..hindsight would have said its better to be wet than sweaty......but I was sweating by the gallon....only seconds from her house.....I found the address,..but I couldn't tell where to park! The driveway was full and there was a mulched area in front of the yard, that looked like it handled parking, it could have been a garden for all I know,..but I couldn't tell from the rain,..so I decided I would parallel park in front of her house just in case,...didn't want to get the "Hey your parked on my petunias!".....Next to the drive way was a big brick mailbox. A nuke could have gone off and this sucker would still be standing,..so I thought. I couldn't see shit,..and I began to back up to park. Just then i hear this noise,......rememeber FIRST DATE HERE!!!! I hit the mail box,...which had yet to have been secured to the ground with a concrete base......Whne I backed into it,..the Mav barely moved, but I could tell I hit something,....but shortly,..seconds later,.... I KNEW I HIT SOMETHING......This big ass mail box,..falls backwards away from my car,..but when it did, the base of it, lifted the back end of my car off the ground.....I couldn't go backwards,..I couldn't go forward! I was on top of the box....nothing I could do...the hope of getting out of the car and standing it back up were dashed,..now not only did I have to tell her folks that I hit their mailbox,...but that I knocked it over AND my car was stuck on top of it. I had to tell them this BEFORE I could safely operate my motor vehicle with their precious cargo inside! I would need their help getting off their mailbox too.....There I sat; sweating in the car,..thinking "Man,..if I could just get off this thing I was gone"!!!!,..Never to be heard from or seen again,....nothing but burn out marks and me gone.....NOPE it just wasn't going to happen....I had to face the music and the band was already playing.....
In summer in Florida, these massive rainstorms disappear as fast as they arrive.....finally it slowed to a drizzle and steam was all over the street. The temps climbed back into the 90's. I got out of the car and surveyed the damage....SHIIIIIIT, GREAT, this is going to SUUUUUUUUCK! Oh well,..I have to be a man about it.....I walk to the door and knock,..her folks let me in and were very nice.....I decided to cut to the chase and fess up right away, before Jenny even came down stairs. They said she was stil getting ready,..but I suspected she was afraid to come down after witnessing my driving skills through her bedroom window. I went to the boss.....I told her dad. I said I was very sorry,..it was raining so hard I couldn't see. If it had been embedded in concrete I would have just tapped it,..but it fell over and now my car is jacked off the ground........He gave me this look,...and her mother left the room,..I thought I was a deadman,.....so young,...now dead! after a few seconds of sitting there,..I heard uncontrolable laughter coming from the kitchen the direction her mother had headed for,..she must be sharpening a knife to cut off my ears or something,...Then her dad busts out laughing....here comes Jenny down the stairs thinking I am winning her folks over.....instead I am wet with sweat and rain and my big beet red face and head glowing like a pilon....man was I embarrassed....since her folks were totally unable to answer her in regard to what was so funny,...I told her what happened,..now I had all three laughing,...luckily she liked me and I got a reassuring pat and hug,......I was about to cry,..I swear to God,..I just wanted to leave......
We all walk to the front door to survey the damage.........After putting up with unending comments from her dad, about demolition derby and how HE was going to drive us on our date,..and moms is over there laughing like something was REALLY funny, and Jenny feeling my pain,..but getting a big kick out of it...I still wanted to leave,..but first things first,..I had to get my car off the mailbox,.....we went out into the drizzle and steam and he told me to get in the car and to specifically NOT TO HIT HIM WITH THE CAR....After a try or two, I was free,...It was all I could do to not keep on driving, leaving a cloud of mud and road wet in my wake as I peeled out,..but I didn't. I got out and apologized again,..thats when he told me, that they just bought the mailbox the week before and had not set it yet in concrete. It had fallen over twice by itself and that it wasn't my fault.....BUUUUUUUT (yes it gets worse), since I DID hit it,...I needed to help him do something!!!!! Great.......You see, they had a Great Dane,..a 250lb Great Dane,...it died the night before and he had dug the hole to bury it,.....he needed help carrying the rigor mortis stiffened carcass of this big beast to its final resting spot,...a five deep pit in the back yard....what could I say? I helped carry that damn dog as my pennance!........So my first date with my first car, with my first girlfriend that I could actually not have to be picked up or dropped off with and this happens.....as we left for our date,...I heard her dad exclaim,..."HAVE HER HOME BY 11,AND DON"T HIT ANYTHING!" Then as the door shut I swore I heard more laughter.......We went out a few more times but nothing ever came of it....I think it was ruined from the first minute.....but I take the lessons with me still today.....I have yet to hit another mailbox.....or bury a great Dane,..may he rest in peace!

The Granny Effect

2006-03-09T09:21:00.000-05:00

You may be thinking this is a continuation of the GILF post in the archives. It's not. This is story about my Granny,..who loves me dearly....I have always been very close to my Granny, very very close. I used to ride my bike as a kid to her house 7 miles away through some of the worst traffic in Jacksonville, just to hang out and get some Granny dinner (which is by far the best dinner you could have). If my folks knew I was riding my bike over there they would have flattened my tires, taken my shoes and grounded me for a month, but Granny is a great conspirator and the bike was parked in the backyard. Grannies usually don't lie,..but if it comes to me getting in trouble for hanging out with her and Pop, she would have lied like a rug.
So last week my Granny gets ill. Not sick, but had a specific medical problem and had to be hospitalized. She is 93 and any condition is bad for a 93 year old. I spent Thursday night with her at the hospital, it was just her and I. I never mind going to the hospital, because there are always cute nurses somewhere in there. So Waiting in the waiting room and things do not bother me, other than the situation at hand....but Granny was in great sprits, and was not medicated so we could talk as we always have.
She always wants to know my love life....I would love nothing more than to give her a great grand baby prior to her departure from this world. I would love nothing more than her to meet my wife. As its going now, I worry that she will not see these things, but know that she would love it. She always pesters me about why I cannot find a "Nice" girl and settle down, have kids. The I get the ol' "You are so handsome and funny, you should have 100 women!" Leave it to Granny to stroke your ego as a man.....the difference is that the world has changed vastly since 1935 when she met my grandfather (a georgia cracker born in Perry, Ga). Granny was an immigrant from Eastern Block Europe then to Canada, then to NY, then to Philly. There she met my Pops while he was in the Navy. She met him at a party, the rest is history.
I try to explain to her that women are differnt now, since they got the right to vote,..she doesn't thinks that's funny,..but I do...then I try to explain how men lost the battle with women when she was a kid and Eve gave Adam the apple,...but she doesn't think that's funny either,..so then i just blame it on those Damned protesters and the sexual revolution of the 60's...that she understands and mumbles DAMN HIPPIES......At any rate I do try to explain to her, that few women to day care to even learn to cook. Some women,..many are more focused on careers than family or even starting a family...she undertands
So there my granny is, in the hospital and she hits me up with the how my love life is,..so I thought, what better way to tell her than to explain the blog......now trying to explain this to a woman that has never even driven a car, is like trying to explain Astrophysics to a pygmie with a lip disk and neck rings.....its just ain't gonna happen,..but I explained it like TV and that I could write what i wanted and that its kind of like a diary and other people can read it any time. I explain to her that mine isn't as personal as a diary, it simply chronicles my dating life as my character Dating Dave. She got the point and I began to tell her some of the sotries posted here. They say laughter is the best medicine,..well no wonder Granny got released from the hospital, I had her aged butt laughing so hard the nurse came into see if she was alright.....I told the nurse,..she was senile and giggles whenever she hears the word "window"...the nurse says "Yeah, me too,..wanna try?" Granny smakced me and the nurse was a "Player" Funny,........we all laughed.
So I was super busy this weekend and Granny was getting turned lose once some tests came back. She was going to be fine they just wanted to know what to tell her about if it happens again and so forth,..so I didn't see her the two days before she was released. She knew from Thursday and Friday all of the girls in my life and who, what, where, when, and why. She may be 93, but she is sharp as a tack and she now knows all of their names AND nicknames....she is so old school! And when I try to explain some of the screw ball thigs that have happened, she say that girl was crazy,..or you should have left her fanny at the concert (See PSYCHO, B-Day , and the Concert" in the archives).
So I get a call from my sister and later from granny. On Sunday granny was working the angles with a nurse at the hospital....poor girl she got interrogated by a 93 year old....granny got her name her age AND her phone number (yeah Granny is a player),..she told Nursey,...that I would be by and she would introduce us and then we should go have coffee......you know that would all be funny,...if it wasn't sad.....my damn granny gettin more phone numbers than me...and worst of all she is getting them for me.....that's alright at least I know there is one woman on my side in this whole thing......and she is not trying to kill me,..she has a vested interest in my well being actually......I'll take the alliance...The bigget problem is that Granny still thinks I am 30,...and thus a 24 year old is perfect for me,..she thinks the man should always be older than the woman.....but 12 years? Well once she found out I was 36 she told me not to call the girl and to forget about,.....ok,..they still tease at 93.......anyway I thought it was funny and this is the granny effect......at 93 she has nothing to lose by asking any young lady she meets for her phone number for her grandson......I just wish her sight was better. Luckily with the nurse,..."K" my sister, was in and out and was able to pull off some recon for me....it would have been fine barring the age difference...thanks to "K" an honorable Committee member, my back was being watched.....

Leader Test and Sexual Zodiac and More

2006-03-03T13:11:00.000-05:00

HEHEHEHE too bad I am not a Democrat.....but I suspect the reason is right ;-) Can you tell I was bored last night? Yeah,..well I did have drinks with Cubana...

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Taurus

You are very stubborn, and your withdrawn nature makes you irresistible to hotties.

You like sex to be romantic and passionate, and you know just how to make it that way. Your partners cannot resist your spontaneous and gentle nature.

Sex matches: Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn

Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com

You have a sexual IQ of 156

When it comes to sex, you are a super genius. You have had a lot of experience, and sex interests you so you know a lot about it. You pride yourself on being a source of information and guidance to all of your friends.

Take this quiz at QuizUniverse.com

Anyone one that knows me knows this IS my favorite movie. I own the trilogy and have watched it many times......Funny Funny stuff....I am humming the theme right now.....

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

And Finally......sexual Zodiac traits,...funny stuff i don't believe in Astrology,..but being a Taurus,..this one is right on......
Okay,..As I said filler!

ARIES
Outgoing.
Spontanious.
Not one to fuck with.
Have own unique sexiness.
Unpredictable.
Erotic.
Funny.
Addictive.
Take you on trips to the moon in bed.

LEO
Great talker.
Sexy.
Always Horny.
Laid back.
Knows how to have fun.
Is really good at fucking.
Great kisser.

AQUARIUS
Trustworthy.
Sexy.
Rare to find.
Loves being in long relationships.
Extremly energetic.
Amazing in bed, the BEST lovers.

CANCER
Great Kisser.
Very high sex appeal.
Great in bed.
Most horny.

PISCES
Caring.
Smart.
Center of attention.
Too Sexy, DAMN IT.
Very high sex appeal.
Has the last word.
Extremely weird but in a good way.
Super good in bed.

LIBRA
Very gentle.
Very romantic.
Nice.
Love is one of a kind.
Silly and fun, sweet!
Have own unique sexiness.
Most caring person you will ever meet!
Amazing in bed!

CAPRICORN
Sassy.
Intelligent.
Sexy.
Predict future.
Irrestible, awesome kisser.
Great talker.
Always gets what he or she wants.
BY FAR the BEST in BED.

TAURUS
Aggressive.
Freak in bed.
Rare to find.
Loves being in long relationships.
Likes to give a good fight for what they want.
Extremly outgoing.
Outstanding kisser.
Sexual as fuck.

VIRGO
Dominant in relationships.
Sexy.
Always horny.
Freak in bed.
Always wants the last word.
Loud.
Caring.
Smart.
Loves being in long relationships.
Addictive.
Attractive.
Loud.

SCORPIO
EXTREMELY sexy.
Talkative.
Energetic.
Predict future.
Most erotic.
Freak in bed.
GREAT kisser.
Not one to mess with.
Always get what they want.

SAGITTARIUS
Spontanious.
Horny.
High sex appeal.
Rare to find.
Good when found.
Loves being in long relationships.

GEMINI
Nice.
Love is one of a kind.
Great listeners
Very Good in bed.
Lover not a fighter, but will still punch your lights out.
Trustworthy.

Myths About Cohabitation

2006-03-03T12:35:00.000-05:00

I ran across this today, thought it might be of interest. I have lived with two women (long term) one for 2 years and one for 5 years: I can assure you I will not live with my wife (ummm if this whole dating thing goes well) prior to getting married.....I don't mean moving in together just prior,..but i am talking while still in gf/bf stage.....No Way Jose! Learned my lessons....errrrrr at least the second time. Anyway, I found this....Copywrites I am sure are in place...I attampted to give credit to both author and pub,...bla blah blah..sue my butt or tell me to take it down....

Four Myths About Living Together Without Marriage
Human Events ^ | Mar 01, 2006 | Janice Shaw Crouse

Posted on 03/01/2006 7:09:06 AM PST by ZGuy

In the United States, living together instead of marrying has become the norm for couples -- half of young adults aged 20-40 are cohabiting instead of getting married. Cohabitation has increased nearly 1,000% since 1980, and the marriage rate has dropped more than 40% since 1960.

Some see substituting living together for marriage as an insignificant shift in family “structure.” Those who are better informed realize that the shift has disastrous ramifications for the individuals involved, as well as for society and public policy.

The faulty reasoning leading young adults to make such a poor choice must be exposed. Here are four myths surrounding the shift.

Myth No. 1: Living Together Is a Good Way to “Test the Water”

Many couples say that they want to live together to see if they are compatible, not realizing that cohabitation is more a preparation for divorce than a way to strengthen the likelihood of a successful marriage -- the divorce rates of women who cohabit are nearly 80% higher than those who do not. In fact, studies indicate that cohabiting couples have lower marital quality and increased risk of divorce. Further, cohabiting relationships tend to be fragile and relatively short in duration; less than half of cohabiting relationships last five or more years. Typically, they last about 18 months.

Myth No. 2: Couples Don’t Really Need That “Piece of Paper”

A major problem with cohabitation is that it is a tentative arrangement that lacks stability; no one can depend upon the relationship -- not the partners, not the children, not the community, nor the society. Such relationships contribute little to those inside and certainly little to those outside the arrangement. Sometimes couples choose to live together as a substitute for marriage, indicating that, in case the relationship goes sour, they can avoid the trouble, expense and emotional trauma of a divorce. With such a weak bond between the two parties, there is little likelihood that they will work through their problems or that they will maintain the relationship under pressure.

Myth No. 3: Cohabiting Relationships Usually Lead to Marriage

During the 1970s, about 60% of cohabiting couples married each other within three years, but this proportion has since declined to less than 40%. While women today still tend to expect that “cohabitation will lead to marriage,” numerous studies of college students have found that men typically cohabit simply because it is “convenient.” In fact, there is general agreement among scholars that living together before marriage puts women at a distinct disadvantage in terms of “power.” A college professor described a survey that he conducted over a period of years in his marriage classes. He asked guys who were living with a girl, point blank, “Are you going to marry the girl that you’re living with?” The overwhelming response, he reports, was “NO!” When he asked the girls if they were going to marry the guy they were living with, their response was, “Oh, yes; we love each other and we are learning how to be together.”

Myth No. 4: Cohabiting Relationships Are More Egalitarian Than Marriage

It is common knowledge that women and children suffer more poverty after a cohabiting relationship breaks up, but it’s not so well understood that there is typically an economic imbalance in favor of the man within such relationships, too. While couples who live together say that they plan to share expenses equally, more often than not the women support the men. Studies show that women typically contribute more than 70% of the income in a cohabiting relationship. Likewise, the women tend to do more of the cleaning, cooking and laundry. If they are students, as is often the case, and facing economic or time constraints that require a reduction in class load, it is almost invariably the woman, not the man, who drops a class.

So What’s the Conclusion?

A mass of sociological evidence shows that cohabitation is an inferior alternative to the married, intact, two-parent, husband-and-wife family. Increasingly, the myths of living together without marriage are like a mirror shattered by the force of the facts that expose the reality of cohabitation.

Dr. Crouse is senior fellow of Concerned Women for America’s Beverly LaHaye Institute.

Jung Test

2006-03-03T09:42:00.000-05:00

Okay, you may or may not know,....Carl G. Jung (1875-1961), is virtually the father of Analytical Psychology. Jung developed a system to test and determine personality types. He also developed a code of four letters that defined your personality type based on the results of your test. He also compared results with all of the other results to set up basic personality types across the spectrum of people he tested as a segment of society as a whole. This definition is very abbreviated and you can search him if you wish to find out more. You can also Google to find many sites that you can take the tests,..some are free some are not. The best site for a comprehensive list of personality, IQ, relationship, and compatibility tests is HERE. Its free, but does require registration. They do compare your results against those of others, pretty neat stuff....
So the other night I took the Jung test and Enneagrams,.....below are my reults....I match 4.3% of the population ( I match approxiamately 12 million of 280 million people),.....No wonder, gees ODD MAN OUT! It may also go a long way to prove my theory that (to me) only about 10% of the population is worth dealing with....(I know I know,...arrogant ass, but thats not true) So I will explain; I figure that only about 10% of the total population is even worth dealing. Having been is sales, Law Enforcement, and various other jobs....I have met or dealt with a reasonably high amount of people, and to some, I am sure I am outside of their 10%. I am useless to them. The way I see this is that people serve three purposes to you. The first is family and friends,..a close circle and can be infinite in size. Second are those that have something to offer you or you them,..they may still be outsuide your 10%, but they aren't useless they have something to offer,..or you have something to offer them. The third,..well this is the rest,...they serve only to get in the way, slow you down, cause you problems, or prevent you from being purposeful in their own goal of being purposeful....these are the people you flip off on the highway; that take forever at the checkout line; do 14 transactions at the ATM, when all you want to do is get cash out, they are trying to get a Mortgage, check thier auntie's account, get some money for the dude in the back seat,...and check their balances over and over and over again. All of you know what I am talking about. Now my numbers are by no way a science,..its a generalization..but the fact reamains,..that only a small portion of the populace is even worth dealing with.......and I too, like you, fall within and outside of those boundaries with others.
I have a date with Cubana this Saturday,..she has a pyschology degree, so I decided to send my results to her prior....to our date. She is going to tell me what it all means. Thankfully,..she is still going out with me and actually said very impressive. I was waiting on the "Dave, we need to really talk,....do you own any guns?" But, she was actually impressed with it and implied that her and I were very compatible in the scheme of things....Here are my results....anyone who knows what this stuff means I welcome the comments, tell me what you think or what it means...I am very interested in this.

Jung Test Results

Extroverted (E) 69.44% Introverted (I) 30.56%Sensing (S) 50% Intuitive (N) 50%Thinking (T) 62.5% Feeling (F) 37.5%Perceiving (P) 51.61% Judging (J) 48.39%

Your type is: ESTP
ESTP - "Promotor". Action! When present, things begin to happen. Fiercely competitive. Entrepreneur. Often uses shock effect to get attention. Negotiator par excellence. 4.3% of total population.

Enneagram Test Results
The Enneagram is a personality system which divides the entire human personality into nine behavioral tendencies, this is your score on each...
Type 1 Perfectionism |||||||||||||| 60%
Type 2 Helpfulness |||||||||||||| 60%
Type 3 Image Awareness |||||||||||||| 53%
Type 4 Sensitivity |||| 16%
Type 5 Detachment |||||||||| 40%
Type 6 Anxiety |||||||||||||| 56%
Type 7 Adventurousness |||||||||||||||||| 80%
Type 8 Aggressiveness |||||||||||||||||| 80%
Type 9 Calmness |||||||||||||||| 63%

Accuracy:

type score type behavior motivation
7 24 I must be high and entertained to be happy.
8 24 I must be strong and in control to be happy.
9 19 I must be peaceful and easy to get along with to be happy.
1 18 I must be perfect and good to be happy.
2 18 I must be helpful and caring to be happy.
6 17 I must be secure and safe to be happy.
3 16 I must be impressive and attractive to be happy.

You scored as Type 8

Your variant is sexual

ESTP
content, emotionally stable, outgoing, social, group oriented, finisher, does not like to be alone, open, decisive, likes external praise, likes to be center of attention, frequently joking, adjusts easily, likes crowds, self confident, neutral moods, good at getting people to have fun, disorganized, messy, talented at presentation, not easily annoyed, does not like to be alone, enjoys crude jokes, likes to lead, likes sports, more likely to come off as masculine, risk taker, tends to dominate conversations, fearless, can handle criticism, hard to discourage

favored careers:
ceo, sports management, fighter pilot, marketing specialist, business manager, race car driver, supervisor, economist, airline pilot, bar owner, consultant, cia agent, security specialist, technician, businessman, mechanical engineer, public relations specialist, coach, manager, marketing director, sales associate, mechanic, politician, publicist

disfavored careers:
poet, artist, art teacher, novelist, bookstore owner, graphics designer, museum curator, librarian, freelance writer, author, florist, painter, school psychologist, songwriter, musician, professional college student, editor, philosopher, english professor

So there you have it......I'll let you know what Cubana has to say about it. It should make for an interesting first date.....

Hell Hath No Wrath As That Of A Woman Scorned

2006-02-28T17:12:00.000-05:00

She called him a Wanker??? Those British Women are dangerous and filthy mouthed,..maybe she should try Orbitz..... ;-)) More later.

Whenever there is nothing to blog about I fill....so I am filling....

Politically Correct

2006-02-28T16:45:00.000-05:00

Most that know me, know for a dead on fact that I AM NOT politically correct,.....but.....since I am here to bitch, moan, groan, inform and enlighten, I thought perhaps I should cater for a moment to those who do......

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>
> 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" -
> She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."
>
> 2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" -
> She is, "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."
>
> 3. She is not "EASY" -
> She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."
>
>
> 4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" -
> She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."
>
> 5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" -
> She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."
>
> 6. She is not an "AIRHEAD"! -
> She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."
>
> 7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" -
> She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED".
>
> 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" -
> She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED."
>
> 9. She does not "NAG" you -
> She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."
>
> 10. She is not a "TRAMP" -
> She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."
>
> 11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" -
> She is "PICTORIALLY SUPERIOR."
>
> 12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" -
> She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."
>
>
>
>
>
> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>
> 1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" -
> He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."
>
> 2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" -
> He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
>
> 3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" -
> He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."
>
> 4. He is not "BALDING" -
> He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."
>
> 5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" -
> He prefers "GENERATIONAL DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."
>
> 6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" -
> He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."
>
> 7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" -
> He develops a case of CRANIAL-ANAL INVERSION."
>
> 8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" -
> He has "SWINE EMPATHY."
>
> 9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" -
> He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."
>
> 10. He is not "HORNY" -
> He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."
>
> 11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants -
> It's "REAR CLEAVAGE"?

Cubana Update Coming

2006-02-28T00:19:00.000-05:00

Some Funnies To Lighten My Ass Up A Bit

2006-02-27T15:00:00.000-05:00

Gut Instincts

2006-02-27T08:32:00.000-05:00

In this post I made mention of gut instincts. I thought that Paula may have still been involved with her ex. I stated simply that something wasn't right and I followed my instincts with her finally. Well last week she contacted me and I asked her out for Friday night, but she declined and indicated we would get together this weekend. I left her a message on Friday, but she did not call me back. Saturday morning she left me a message, but when i tried to call her back all I got was voice mail. Turns out she was studying at the collge next door to my house for her Master's mid-term.
I went to wash my car at the nearby car wash and while I was vacuuming it out,....she sneaks up in her truck right behind me and blows the horn,..effectively making me skid my drawers. I was surprised, it was the first time we had seen each other in almost 7 weeks. although we had spoken two or three times, we still had not seen each other. She was as attractive as I remember and we instantly felt all of those things that people involved feel after a separation. I talked with her for a minute and she explained how much she missed me and still felt for me. I took this with a grain of salt, but continued to listen to her story. After a few minutes, she leaned over and kissed me and apologized for letting us end. We made out for a few minutes and it was obvious I had feelings for her still and she for me......After 30 minutes or so of talking and kissing, she left. We agreed (I thought) to get together that night if my plans fell through, which I told her were expected to fall through anyway.
I waited for her call Saturday afternoon, but she didn't call. I continued on with my errands all day, checking my phone to see if she called. My plans fell through Satu night as expected so I called her and again left a voice mail, by 11:30 I had called her three times and no answer. I spent a quiet night by myself, secretly waiting for Paula to call. She did not.
Sunday morning I get an email from her pretty much stating that she thinks I want back with Thatgirl and that there is nothing for us. She said that I was supposed to call her and she wanted to spend the night with me (I did call her). I was so livid,..that I just picked up the phone and called. We had twenty or so minutes of back and forth and I was getting madder by the second. She still thinks that bitch is in my life (since I told her she showed up last week and hell she did the same thing,..just popped up in my life again except a day after Thatgirl). She still thinks she is second fiddle.....this was a huge problem in our relationship. She always suspected I was cheating on her. Everyone that knows me knows that that was not true...there was ZERO contact with Thatgirl unless she just showed up or emailed me,..which did happen. But I was always honest with Paula and told her everything that went on, when it went on.....But here we are on the hpone getting nowhere and me having to defend myself to a girl I miss about things I am not doing.
I have a theory that if someone adamantly accuses you of something youa re not doing or several things that simply aren't true then they are probably projecting what they are doing on you. I mean if they are doing something wrong, and begin to accuse you of those things, its most likely because it is what they are doing and because they are doing those things they expect you are as well. Make sense? I have learned this over the years. Thatgirl solidified this with me and I was constantly being accused by Paula of things that just didn't make sense. And my guts told me something was up....I ignored them,..both then and again Saturday.
I get off the phone with her pretty mad and disappointed. She was telling me how I didn't try to fix us (which was BS) and how I made little effort. I point blank asked her if she was back with her ex or had intentions of it. She said "no". I asked her again....since that was what she was accusing me of. Again "No". After the phone call I wanted to at least make the effort. I took a shower and drove up to her house, about 26 miles away to face to face her. She was not there. I left a note, but before I drove back I thought maybe I should go by her mom's and see if she was there. Its about 6 blocks from her house,...her ex happens to live next door to her mom...I figured I would get my answers. I pulled up and honked the horn,...her Truck was there, so I knew she was. Her mom looked out, then dashed off and then looked out again.....I decide to go to the door....before I can get up the walk,..out comes Paula walking to the side of the house, trying to keep me away from the door.
She tells me to come over to where she is standing,..but I am just standing there looking at the door and back at her and then back at the door.....I knew I had caught her......I go over to her and tell her why I am there and she says "You need to leave"....I ask why? She just repeats that I need to leave.....I ask her if her ex is inside....again, you need to leave.......I ask her a gain and she finally fessed up that he was..... At that point rage took over. I was had,..not once, but twice by her. She had made a fool of me....she had been lying,...and she probably had been the entire relationship....my guts had not only been right once,..but twice...batting .1000.
At that point all I could do was yell loud enough for his sorry old ass (25 years her senior), that she was a whore, a bitch, and a liar. I repeated it again and said yelled at the house to enjoy his new fuck with her and now she has a new house and two cars for him to take,..since he did that in their divorce 8 years ago (took her for everything, and just so she could get out of all of it,..she gave it up and left her with nothing....she was partially at fault,..but he had cheated on her and she caught him). I left,..I laid rubber for the next 5 blocks I was soooooo disappointed and felt like sucha fool...sometimes its just better to not know the truth.....she had gotten me again and I fell for it. She left me messages trying to tell me that her and I were done,..but that she had never cheated on me with him......a liar is a liar is a liar......she got caught lying and at that point,....all she was doing was lying more....and trying to get me in bed and probably bedding him down too,...makes her a whore.......this is the end of Paula....I hope she enjoys her miserable life.....
Some people come into your life and are just a train wreck. They wreck havoc at every turn. They are low on ethics and are only out for themselves....she is one. I will always remember my instincts and gut feelings now. This lesson has been taught to me enough. I would rather over react then feel as I did yesterday....I will be in a better mood later and will get back to being funny.....but I promised the ups and downs of dating in this blog.....and there is your down, or mine rather........thus is dating and why I hate it so much.

Then It Gets EVEN Crazier

2006-02-25T19:44:00.000-05:00

On the way home from the bar, I "Drunk Dial" ~~~this is similar to the 3 a.m. call that you can find out about here.
I Drunk Dial Cubana (the yet mentioned girl). Only God and her know what I said.....and as of this morning, she was mad. I think I have smoothed it over and I have apologized. She pretty much read me the riot act via email.....I have no idea where it is going now....and damn I liked her. But she did say she was going to call me tomorrow...fair enough.

It Just Keeps Getting Crazier

2006-02-25T18:38:00.000-05:00

So there I was minding my own business again.....Last night after work I stopped by the Ol' waterin hole for some Friday libation. The bar was full (where I normally sit) and there was a larger than usual crowd at the tables as well. Finally, someone unasses a seat and it just so happens to be next to m buddy (Big Dale). Its always a good time next to BD, we tend to get out of hand a bit as the liquor flows, but its always entertaining and anyone near us ends up involved in whatever foolishness we either begin or get involved in, so its always fun.
I was waiting for Cubana to call me and I was going to leave when she did. But that seat I referred to opened up and I parked next to BD. On the otherside was a very attarctive blond that I had never seen before.....I decided....Player? Or not a player was in order.......defnitely a player.........Small talk started and I had her laughing in minutes. She was older than me,..but not so much that you would notice a separation in ages. We laughed for a few minutes and next thing I know she bought me a drink. Then another.....I think she was trying to get me drunk. For the first hour and a half I was in the bar,..I bought one beer and drank three plus two shots and a gin and tonic.......she said she needed to leave it was getting dark. I asked what happens when dark comes,....she said I turn into a pumpkin.....I said "Hi, I'm Peter Peter....." Next thing I know we were laughing so hard that it got quiet around us from everyone wanting to know what was funny.....she made me write down my number and then she left.....fine by me...I have more trouble than I need right now.
So there I sat....yeah minding and business! BD and I are getting our drink on, and now I have a good buzz going. In walks "Pork chop". Pork Chop is another older, but very attarctive and well dressed lady that sometimes comes in on Fridays. BD and I have our own nicknames and last time we ran into her we named her. Long story but I introduced myself to her last itme as Sir Loin, by the end of the night she was Pork Chop......BD and I slide apart and she sits between us....man we were getting rowdy and funny and drunk....now all three of us....
PC was dressed very sexy and a low cut top. She caught me peeking.....hey I am a man and we do things like that....she asked if I liked them......they were natural and very nice and I said so. Next thing I know BD is fall down drunk and getting a ride home from the owner. This leaves her and I alone still laughing, but now the conversation changes. She asked what I am doing later. I played it cool,...but I was getting drunker by the second. I asked her why she asked and she said well why don't you come out with me to the other side of town. NO WAY I"M DRIVING THAT FAR....next thing I know she is grabbing my crotch and all but begging me....I looked at her and said aren't you married? She said yeah and he'll be here in a little while....Alright then don't you think you ought to stop grabbing my dick? And she actually asked me why....ummmmmmm YOU'RE MARRIED! I quip!
She then procceeds to tell me its okay and that we were going to have some fun......A SWINGER! Well sure enough, here comes her husband. Nice lookin dude built like a brick shithouse and she introduces us. I was nervous simply because some women just like to get their significant others to beat people up.....but next thing I know he is asking if she likes me. She told him yes....and there we go drinking more and laughing our asses off. After several hours...its now 11, she asks me if I am coming with them and kisses me on the neck and pulls down her top enough to get a good look, but no one else saw it.....I told her I needed to go. I wanted to change clothes at the least since I was still in my work clothes. Next thing I know, her hubby is asking me if I am coming and offers that if I go with them right now,..he would get me a cab or limo home my choice.......LIMO? WTF? And he was serious. I guess thats a man that likes to have a happy wife....we talk for a while and sure enough he truly doesn't give a damn if his wife is porking some guy (me) from the bar.......It was right then that I decided its best if I take my ass home......PC demanded my phone number and got it (ummm I think). NONE of last night was right, but I had two ops to get laid.....luckily I bowed out of both gracefully.

Yeah........you never know....and this whole player thing may get my ass into either an orgy or trouble.....I am afraid to go back,......but will without question.....so is the life of Dating Dave.

Types of Sex

2006-02-24T09:35:00.000-05:00

I ----- SOCIAL SECURITY SEX

Two men were talking. So, how's your sex life?"
"Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex."
"Social Security sex?"
"Yeah, you know -
I get a little each month, but not enough to live on!"

II ----- LOUD SEX
A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem, doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this ear splitting yell."
"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is."
"The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"

III ----- QUIET SEX
Tired of a lifeless sex life, the man came right out and asked his wife during a recent lovemaking, "How come you never tell me when you have an orgasm?"
She looked at him casually and replied, "You're never home!"

IV ----- CONFOUNDED SEX
A man was in a terrible accident, and his "manhood" was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn't cover the surgery since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for "small," $6,500 for "medium," and $14,000 for "large." The man was sure he would want a medium or large, but the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options.
The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected. "Well, what have the two of you decided?" asked the doctor. The man answered, "She'd rather remodel the kitchen".

V ------ WEDDING ANNIVERSARY SEX

A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel! on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary. The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: 'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'."

"Yeah," she replies, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.'

VI --- NO SEX
My husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said, "This will make you happy tonight." He was right.
When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in.

VII ---- OLD SEX
One night an 87 yr old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 yr.old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor assisted living apartment...killing him instantly.
Brought before the court on a charge of murder.The judge asked her! if she had anything to say in her defense.
She began coolly, "Yes, your honor, I figured that at 92, if he could have sex..... he could fly.

Cubana and The Salsa

2006-02-23T15:08:00.000-05:00

Well most of the woman that know me.....committee members (et al) they see and read these things and think.....WELL HELL YOU DESERVED THAT ONE....and then they watch as I embark on another STUUUUUUUPPPPPIIIIDDD adventure. A couple of posts ago I mentioned that love is not only blind, its deaf, dumb, and stupid....certainly short bus material.....in the words of Carlos Mencia (a hilarious commedian) DEE DEE DEE.....short bus...retard sound......Well I drive that short bus and get myself into all kinds of trouble....
What has always pissed me off about dating is I meet a girl,..she is hot, she is sexy, funny, smart, whatever,....and then comes the BUUUUUUUUUUT! But what you ask??? Well but:

She has kids
She has a husband
she has an ex
she is dirt poor trailer trash
she is emotionally clingy
she is stuck up
or she is missing teeth
she is totally flat chested
she has one leg shorter than the other
she's very pretty, but 36-28-97
she's awesome but a lesbian

you get the idea.....there is always a "but".....and those "buts" are what kills me....now some obviously I can overlook and some I cannot,...as you can well imagine.....I dated a girl way way back.....she was pretty cool, only moderately embarrassed me in front of my friends by the way she acted....she was funny, she was sexy, she was great in the sack....she also had this twitch thing...yep every so often her head would twitch noticeably on her neck....odd and didn't change that I liked her,..didn't happen all the time,...but it DID become rather annoying....that was a "but"

So now that I have prefaced this,.....I move on to Cubana and The Salsa:
Last week, I went back on Match. I didn't subscribe, but did reactivate my photo and profile. I wanted to see how many times I was checked out (a stat you can check) and see if I got some winks.....which I have.....(its a way of flirting without sending an email and I can't get email until I subscribe again). But, I went back on for that and to see if new faces had appeared on the lists yet,..and there was some new blood....I thought about subscribing, but decided that since I was going to a huge party Friday night at my watering hole,..that the probability was good that I may very well meet someone....one nighter or otherwise........
There I was minding my own business leaning against a wall near the back of the bar so that I could pick out the weak of the herd and plan my route of attack. I was looking as cool as I could, because yes indeed there were VERY hot women roaming around.....So I was looking cool, dressed nice,...and smelling good and did I mention minding my own business??? For those of you that might now who I reference in this post because you were there and know who i am talking about have to absolutely keep your pie holes shut about this to these people....I mean it....ask my why later,..but shut up until.....that means you Committee Member "K" and anyone else.......
So in walks two women I know well....one is a full time bartender there and off for the night,..the other her sister.....sometimes works there if help is needed. In tow is a leggy, nice butted, very attractive woman.....HEY SHE WAS AT THE BACK OF THE HERD....I began to plan my route....I also knew that a woman that attractive with all of these swinging dicks around would not last long.....luckily I didn't have to do anything except stay right the hell where I was,..they came to me......YEAH! Just then one of the owners of the bar ("T" a female). She pops me in the stomach as says "NOW there is a tall cool drink of water" T likes me a lot and rarely makes comments except when she think I should be talking to a pretty girl in the bar....I just laugh and then I am introduced to Cubana....very nice very sweet and fun to look at.....
Being a player.....I say Would you hold my spot on the wall, I'll be back in a minute.....she say "Yeah, I was looking for a place to lean" I giggle,...she giggles...WE GIGGLE. She's a player.....
I return and find her holding my spot,..and when I return she gives me the wall back....and I call her my "Wall Spouse" if ever a divorce we will split it 50-50.....laugh some more....a few minutes go by and we are talking....and getting along great....I leave her there....she was with friends anyway....and I in my cool ways.....just walk off and begin to mingle.....but I look back and I was being checked out....she caught me a few times....then I realized resistance was futile...I might as well go back over....we moved to a different part of the bar,..and she stands almost leaning up against me.....but her body is turned towards me...super open posture....we were ummmm errrr well hitting it off totally...guys come by and flirt with her,..but she always turns back to me....now with that said...you have to know that women sometimes pick out someone they could easily kill and keep them engaged, basically like a cat with a toy...they think its fun,..it wards off other intrusions,..and she gets the dude totally hot that she is tieing up to be killed at a later date or time......
She asks me if I dance.........I have stated this clearly before,..but will do so again.....I would rather lose toes if you told me to dance while shooting at my feet.....than actually dance......I can dance,..I just do not like to dance,...and I certainly cannot dance well......but men I will tell you..it may not be a deal breaker,..but a woman wants to see a man she is interested in dance....they get some sexual how do you do's out of watching it....they decide RIGHT then if you are going be a lousy lay or not.....however....you don't have to dance well,..just be able to move I don't call it dancing I call Air Sex...its like air guitar but different.....I manage to get away with not dancing the first one and she ends up out with Leisure Suit Larry,...you know the type of guy I am talking about,..so I thought,..hey thats harmless....songs over she comes immediately back....I ask her if I can buy her a drink...she thinks for a minute.....and says.."How about I buy YOU a drink" BOOOOOOIIIIIIINNNNNNGGGGGG....yeah you know it baby.....Player 1 meet Player 2.
Then a slow song comes on.....so I ask her to dance and off we go....very nice,...a little touching...lots of close talking while looking at each other....AND I got to show her I can dance......WIN WIN WIN.....all the way back to our spots we hold hands....kind of cool,..definitely interested in me. And me in her........we talk about college, drinks, sports, food, family...the whole enchilada and shortly thereafter she is teaching me the first moves of the SALSA.....Hell yeah talk about sexy....she is 1/2 Cuban....in Florida.....you could toss a dart in the air in a bar and hit a cuban every time....so not unusual,..but some of them are beautiful....they are different from other hispancis in my opinion....I have dated two part cubnan women....they both had great skin,... always had a little darker complection, and almost always black hair and deep brown eyes.....very sexy...for those wondering..Daisy Fuentes is Cuban...I LOVE DAISY.
We dance a few more times (each time closer) and I decide to giver her my card and number...see if this was all bullshit or not......I handed it to her and said...there is every way possible to get a hold of me without rolling over in bed.....I would like to see you again......but more than that I want to learn about you...she left a few minutes later with the two she came with...I walked all of them out (err staggered) them all out...I stayed and proceeded to get TORE THE FUCK UP....I was having a blast...the party was fun,..there was a shadow dancing box and between that and the booze the ladies were getting crazy...and I even walked in on a dude getting aBJ in the bathroom....things like this don't happen at this bar.....but nonetheless....it was off the chain. I closed the place out,..even helping them put up the chairs.....I get home around 2:30 or so and there is a message...its from Cubana....she says "Just to let you know this was not bullshit, call me back".
I call her back....we stay on the phone until well after 4:45 in the morning.....we talk again Saturday and Sunday WHILE I was at the Daytona 500. She would call and ask if I saw something (another Nascar fan yeeehaaa). And we would joke about drivers and things going on..it was fun.....We must have talked 7-9 times.....Sunday. Chemistry was there,..conversation was great,..Very smart.....couldn't get anything by her. Monday morning at 8:15 a.m. there is a message on my phone......from her....I couldn't wait to call her and wanted to call her before I knew she called,...but I also didn't want to be presumptive either....

Part Duex:
Cubana and I have spent many hours on the phone,...many. We talk three or four times a day or more. The laughs come easily, and the conversation even when about nothing is entertaining. There is definitely a huge attraction between us. We have things in common that on levels that are inexplicable. From Carrot Cake to favorite colors......I mean things that do make a cool relationship,..you rarely have to ask anything because if you like it,..she more than likely does and if she doesn't she understands why I might have thought that she would. Its very easy and extremely natural,..there is no pressure at any level. I was supposed to go see her while she was on a business trip to Orlando....the night was set and we were pretty sure that I was spending the night. The afternoon before, I heard a crack in her voice and commented it sounds like you are losing your voice.......by th enext morning she could barely talk, not only because of her voice, but becuase she had come down with nasty nasty flu......we canceled the trip down for me. It was for the better,..she was ill through the entire next weekend and into last week. She is better now and we spent what time she could actually talk talking......it is amazing how much you can learn about someone, when you both long to be together and know you can't. She also lives 50 miles south of me,..so drive by's and drop ins can't happen unless planned. But we were very content to learn about each other at the distance.......it gave us both a bit of security in knowing we alread knew we were cool together, but as people we learned more than most know in a lifetime about each other. I have experienced this before with my live in girlfriend back 4 years ago....we did the long distnace thing for a year before she moved down here. We were together 5 years and I can tell you that the bulk of the reason we stayed together that long was the trust and conversations we had being apart,...that case was 900 miles. We learned how to love and be apart, trust and be apart, want and be apart,...we had a very condensed realtionship. Crammed into 4-5 days every two to three weeks and supplimented by phone calls.
The same is true of Cubana. We can't really see eachother except weekends, between work and family. My Grandmother (Nanny) went into the hospital Wednesday night. Although my realtionship was new with Cubana, she knew I had to take care of business and spend time with Nanny. She knew that we wouldn't talk much, but left me many messages wishing my granny well and telling me that she wanted to talk to me when I got a chance,..all are very encouraging things for a number of reasons......
Finally I got to see Cubana again, Thursday night while I was at the hospital she leaves me a message wishing Nanny well and telling me that she was meeting two friends (one of which introduced us) in south Jax. Funny because Nanny's hospital was on that side of town.....I was in NO shape to meet a girl that night. I was in my "working in the warehouse" clothes, just left a hospital to see Nanny, and the day was well into 17 hours long. She all but begged me.
I went to publix near where I was to meet her and bought AXE body spray ( a good sub for cologne), some breath mints and a razor,..to trim my hairy ass up (not really my ass). I did all of this in the Publix bathroom and was ready to go, a splash of cold water, breath mint,......good to go. I went across the street to where she was and this was the first time to see her since we met although I felt like I knew her better than any woman I dated in the last 10 years....

To be continued

The Player in Me

2006-02-23T12:50:00.000-05:00

Okay, last week I posted about being a "Player" you can track back by clicking here:
So I decided to be a player.....I really am already one obviously,..but I wanted to just start saying "hi" to every girl I found attractive....anywhere I was and anytime....I haven't had much luck in running into that many of them over the last week.....but I have run across a couple.....

So last night I am in the gas station behind my complex, picking up beer (go figure). And as I walk up to the door, outbound was a beautiful lady. I rush to open the door for her and I say "Hi" She was mid 30's and curvy!!! She says thanks and "Hi" back.....I continue in and forget that I am supposed to find out if she is a player....I get my beer and come back out get into my truck and notice she is pumping gas.....I drive over to the pumps and roll down my window and say:
Would you like me to pump that for you,..I have a degree in "Pumpology"
She says: well I am done now,..you experts are never around when a woman needs you.
I say: well I have other specialties too, maybe I am just ahead of your next need.....
She says.....hmmmmm maybe........
I say: You are very beautiful
She asked: if that was my specialty too....
I said: No, but it was my minor....
she laughed and said thanks. She had a very big smile on......this was practice for me,..since my phone rang and it was Cubana...I had to leave......I left with a waive and she was grinning ear to ear....turns out she lives in my complex.......perhaps the seeds of a later meeting are already sown....
I like this player thing....and last Friday it played out very VERY well. In fact its how I met Cubana......I had a spot leaning against a wall at a party and she became my "Spot Spouse" She was a player...and so was I....more about her next post.....
These are my player moments for this week....one got me a Date for Saturday night......the other got me a huge smile from a neighbor, that I hope to run into again....

THEY'RE BACK PT II

2006-02-23T10:54:00.000-05:00

START WITH PART I by clicking here....its important to read these in order.

PART II:

Finally, I get done, and am ready for work.....and then I flat out ask her......WHY ARE YOU HERE? I get this story about needing closure.....wanting to know why I didn't care that she was pregnant or that she had an abortion.....and I said "you came here to find out that? and you came here with nothing proving that you actually were, and you totally BS'd me in most of our relationship, and tried to damage me both personally and professionally and you want to know why I don't care?" Her answer was "We are not talking about all of that....I just want to know why?" So I told her I didn't believe her and that I offered her help and assistance in whatever (and I did), but I wanted proof,..and when you chose to fight and argue and refuse me that,..then it never became my problem.....and I never believed it....
We talked for a few more minutes and she said that she just wanted some closure and she was going to leave,..and I said ok,..walked her out to her car and a brief hug, waived goodbye and off she went....
I doubt this is the last time I see her. I don't think she is through with me yet....but other than her great big beautiful tits.....nothing else even appealed to me about her. I knew why I fell in love with her and her very large very beautiful chest.....but, so much water had passed under and tsunamied over the bridge, that there was no way to work anything out even if I wanted too.....she was...well how do I put this......ummmmmm.........eeerrrr FUCKIN NUTS!
I go to work and she had apparently stopped by there first looking for me. There was a note on my door...from her....short sweet to the point. "Stopped by, wanted to chat a little bit, call me if you get a chance,..nothing urgent. THATGIRL." Ya know how when you have been in love with someone and you share certain things....that when you see them or are heavily reminded of them, you get that feeling? That pit in your stomach?....that release of your personal narcotics, thanks to the pharmacist residing in your brain....well I was on overdose.....Thus is the way a Tuesday starts out sometimes when you are dating....
So then comes Wednesday......and there I was,....... minding my own business......The day was long. I was supposed to be in Orlando meeting a woman I met last Friday who was there on business for crazy freaky hotel sex and YES THIS IS A WHOLE OTHER STORY I HAVE NOT EVEN STARTED YET AND YES IT HAS BEEN RUNNING CONCURRENT TO ALL OF THIS BULLSHIT THIS WEEK.......but I was home Wednesday either way and I will explain why later,..and after talking to the new girl who I will call Cubana, and apparently pissing her off beyond belief.....I get a phone call.....thinking it was Cubana talling me to fuck off or kiss her ass or whatever......but it wasn't......it was NASCAR! It was Paula.....Haven't heard from her in three weeks and haven't seen her in 5. There she is on my phone.....I really liked Nascar....but things went bad for us..because of her.....SEE WHAT I MEAN......trying to kill me....
Why did she call??? She missed me......I do miss Paula,.....buuuuuuuuttttt. So we talked on the phone for a long time....I asked her several questions about what happened and why she got so mad at me all the time (BECAUSE SHE IS TRYING TO KILL ME THAT'S WHY). She said that she was just in a bad place in her life and she took it out on me. I actually got a heartfelt (SUCKER) apology out of her. She said that over the last few weeks she realized that I put up with a ton of BS with her and did tons of things FOR her, and she was not appreciating it at the time.....HERE COMES THE SHORT BUS.......
She is not a drinker, so it wasn't a booty call at 3 a.m. (and yes women do this just like guys do). When guys make that late night call its usually to a girl that they THINK actually WANTS to hear from them and the guy is usually plastered and believes this as fact....when truthfully....I have never experienced one the girls I called at 3 a.m. drunk ever telling me,..YES I love you I am sorry, come over and do me,...and we will get married tomorrow......
NEVER happened, but not for lack of trying on my part.....
With that said, if a girl makes that call.....then the man almost always says yes because we are pigs and we are drunk, and we just got turned down by the girl we just called at 3 a.m. Again win win for that secret society.......See as the theory goes.....Woman "A" gets the call from Man "A"'s drunk ass...she has already tried to kill him and hasn't succeeded,..but just by the very phone call itself she knows she is actaully still killing him and now its taking no effort..she doesn't have to put up with his farts, beer breath, dirty socks.....nothing.....she can lay in bed at 3 a.m. and let the phone ring knowing its one of the men she is killing or she can hand the phone to the new death rower (Man "B") laying next to her in bed and when he hears a dude on the other end looking for her at 3 his execution gets fully underway Not only has WOMAN "A" began killing "MAN B", she may ever actually get MAN "B" to help kill MAN "A"....she is now killing two "birds" with one stone....then she will use her super secret communication network to radio Woman "B", she says.....via telepathy.....
A: hey girl wassup?

B: Nothing here just killing a new one....

A: yeah?

B: Yeah,..this one is weak and lame in bed,...so I will kill him quick..he is already ruined for any other woman....

A: OOORAH, the Mothership will be glad to hear this news....Hey I just got a call from MAN "A" and I am still tied up killing MAN "B" in fact I used MAN "A" to start the death of MAN "B"

B: Well "A" that's why you are our squad leader....good work.....what can I do to help?

A: Well I think you dated,..errrrr tried to kill MAN "A" before,..but before we had a chance to discuss these matters he cheated on you with me

B: Yeah I remember him,....he was weak too,..but evasive.....he got away from me....it will never happen again.

A: Well here is what I want you to do....Go ahead and kill your MAN "C" by telling him you think he sucks in bed,..you hate his mom,..and that you are going to go have sex with your ex,...if he is weak that should finish him off.....1 down.......
next go get a good buzz, then call MAN "A",..tell him you are drunk and booty calling him.....he just called me, I let mine answer the phone so as to start the process of killing both of them...MAN "A" should be totally wounded....go get laid and finish him off....and Man"B" may show up since he was pissed that Man "A" called I gave him "A"'s address and he is on the way over there now....if you get a chance kill both.....if not return "B" to me,...you and Man "B" can decide who kills Man "A" it might be sexy to watch them fight,..but then again...."B" needs killing too, lets not forget....

Okay well that may be a bit much but thats my theory and I am sticking to it.....

So back to Paula.....she is not a drinker and I didn't think she was a member of the society...I thought she was a defector,..but after this week.....there was obviously some comms between the women trying to kill me.....this was not a booty call....but we did talk and agreed to talk again soon.......Yep and there is my Wednesday.....
So Monday: NC
Tuesday THATGIRL
Wednesday: NASCAR (PAULA)

Men I have thwarted the attack.....but I am wounded bad....I ma using the Force,..but the light is getting dim....please send back up.......they are evil and some have big chests,..that I like and want to see again......EVIL I SAY!

Today is Thursday.....all I have left is a woman I forgot about (Defense Mechanism AND its not 3 in the morning AND I am not DRUNK).....or the only one left is NURSE the Eharm/Match girl...I still havbe not heard from her after two Fridays ago when we had communication breakdown....as the song goes.....I dread answering the phone tonight or today.....DREAD IT.
Its obvious I am under a full assault. I am falling back to regroup, rearm, and prep for battle....I think I need a nap.

Stay tuned for Cubana

THEY'RRRRRRE BAAAAAAAACCCCKKKK!

2006-02-23T09:44:00.000-05:00

Alright, thats it! All women are officially crazy and all of them have a super ultra secret communication network. They are worse than terrorists,...in fact I am sure that they ACTUALLY ARE terrorists. Secretly, they all know each other,....they talk and have regular meetings....their goal you ask???? To kill men one by one and make their deaths as painful as possible and prolong it as long as they can....now it may not be ALL women.....I think maybe some escape the grips of this secret society (that's not so secret now) and become normal women....they defect and become wives and enjoy marriage,...and to not actually slowly kill one man over the course of 40-60 years.....these defectors are what makes men like me weak and unable to tell the difference......
So there I was.....just minding my own business.....working at my desk and suddenly BLING "You be havin some Mail"...so I open the in-box expecting to see how I can get a lower mortgage rate and a boner all by replying to an email AND win two free airline tickets too,...but there is an email from an Ex (who until now has not made it on the blog, and was prior to all of this). She sends me a picture of her in labor (uuuuuhhh yeah) and overlayed with her kissing her baby. A great photo to say the least.......BUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTTT. This woman who shall be called "N.orthC.arolina". N.C. and I had a great fling, lots of fun, liked lots of the same stuff and had good break furniture sex. Something wasn't right though, she had an "ex" herself and I was suspicious that she never REALLY ended it with him. I suspected for some of our relationship that I was being used for revenge.......on him. But, I fell hard for NC and we all know that love is not only blind, its deaf, dumb, and stupid too...Love is definitely a "short bus" passenger... One day NC calls me and says that her ex gave her an egagement ring. She took it and accepted his proposal....Ummmm hello!! We are in love here!!!! Totally crushed me....I mean WTF? After that she wouldn't return my calls....I tried desperately to find out who, what, where, when, and why....her mind was made up and I think it was made up long before we even started dating...I tried to email her and explain how I felt,...I just kept getting kicked in the nuts......(this is also why I wear an "athletic cup" all the time....got to protect the boys)...Worst part is that she is good friends and a colleague of one of my "Committee Members" (you know, the girls that I think have defected to this side and are spies for me on the secret society). This committee member had to listen to my sorry heartbroken ass moan and groan for weeks over NC AND had to see her everyday too.....shortly thereafter,..NC gets married, pregnant, has kid,..and now is sending me pics of it (this would be the part of trying to kill a man, and this is a long range attack,...kind of like an ICBM from thousands of miles away,...the email bling was actually that whistling sound you hear in a movie right before a bomb hits) and I suppose I should change my "You be havin some mail" to a soldier yelling at the top of his lungs....."INCOOOOOOOMINGGGG"....the hits just keep on coming......
Oooooohhhhh, but that is just part of the whole story here......That was I think Monday....then.............................there.......................was.......................Tuesday. So there I was, minding my own business,..taking the morning shower, singing some stupid jingle that I can't get out of my head.....theres room for stupid songs to linger but no room for my head to figure how to grow more hair.....Nature can be cruel sometimes....but I digress.....so there I was minding my own shower business and I hear something......What was that?? Stop, look, listen.....nothing.....so back to minding my own business again.....and there it is again........its the door? Who in their right mind is knocking on my door at 7:45 a.m. Landlord? The Law? Candy-gram?....I yell for them to hold on.....I desoap and grab a pair of jeans.....no shirt, no drawers...just commando.....If it was the landlord.....two knocks and the door opens.....I didn't want to be caught buck ass naked....I open the door and its............. You guessed it...."Thatgirl"
I never quite finished my story on her,..but everyone reading got the point and it was what it was.....Several weeks after we broke up she again claimed to be pregnant.....and after insulting me and calling me several names she said she was going to have an abortion and that I didn't deserve to have a child on this earth...FUCKIN OUCH lady! After consulting with everyone....we all agreed that it was bullshit and she was just trying to get me back for whatever...and knowing her stance on abortion,...she would have never even contemplated it.....I knew it, she knew it....but maybe she was and maybe she did.....only she and God know (and her friends I guess). But there she is standing at my door a quarter to 8. I let her in.......yeah against my better judgement....I began completing the daily routine of getting ready and she wasn't going to tell me anything until I was done and she had my attention. We had idle chit chat until I was done. DAMN I LOVE HER CHEST ITS HUGE>>>>>>>>>>must think about how evil she is,..must think how evil she is.......damn look at those things.....I want to see them again......EVIL I SAY EVIL.....this was the fight going on inside me......
To be continued......

Player? Not Player?

2006-02-17T08:47:00.000-05:00

HEHEHEHEHE Well as I was cruising around the TRI-W this morning, wondering what I was going to post today..Life has been a bit dull lately (not that I am complaining)...Then, I run across a link from a link from a link and my morning changed...the creative juices began to flow. We all know how you can start out searching for something of interest and end up interested in something you may not have known even existed. I reckon the exact same is true for dating....hmmmmmm kind of makes you think a little bit....
I have been in many relationships, that while dating had my heart set on one type, or one thing, or one trait,..only to find that I actually liked something completely different. I guess you can tie this to the adage "Be careful what you wish for,...you just might get it." Robert Fulghum is the author of "All I really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten". I had really gotten to like his website, but have forgotten about it over the last year. Then, I run across a link in a link and BAM I am at his site.....and I run across this GEM....
In my last post I spoke of just saying "Hi".....Yep! Being a player of sorts.....then I read this and it all comes together:

February 12, 2006

Seattle, Washington
Written February 12, 2006

PLAYERS

Definition: Persons with enough nimbleness of mind to accept a surprise invitation to jump into a quick game of imagination.

Example: Here's a city bus driver standing in the door of his vehicle, staring into the rain. An invitation from me, passing by: "OK, here's the deal: I'll pay for the gas, and you'll drive us straight to the beach at Santa Monica."

He smiles. "OK, meet me here at midnight. It's the end of my run and they won't miss me or the bus until morning. I'll get some barbecue."
A player.

Example: This lady with a shopping cart full of oddball stuff standing beside me in front of the cheese counter at the grocery story. My invitation: "I like the groceries in your cart better than mine. Want to trade? You take mine and I'll take yours. Could be interesting when we get home."

She smiles. Checks out my cart. "You've got a deal,"she says. We take each other's carts and roll away. Later, she's waiting for me at the check-out counter. She knows and I know: we weren't really going to go through with it. But the few moments of madness brought new meaning to "going to the store for a few things."
A player.

Example: There's a tailor shop on Queen Anne Avenue. Sign in the window says "Alterations and Repairs for Men and Women." The tailor is standing in the doorway. I stop. "I'd like to get altered and repaired," I say.
She looks at me cautiously. Goes inside. Closes the door.
Not a player.

Example: Vivacious young woman who works at the sidewalk flower stand at a nearby market. Last year she called me "Babycakes"just before Valentine's Day, but I haven't seen her since. Invitation: "Do I still look like Babycakes to you?" I ask.

She looks at me shrewdly. "Sir, it is the policy of the store that employees are not to get familiar with customers." "Oh, too bad,"say I. She's no longer a player. As I turn my back and walk away, she whispers, "Thanks for coming by, babycakes."
An undercover player now.

Example: Me at a well-known company to pick up copies of a manuscript, I am visibly annoyed - this is my third trip to get what was promised yesterday. The anxious clerk, Miss Saucer-eyes, is obviously new to the herd behind the counter and doesn't know what to do with me or for me. The work is still not done, despite promises. Getting mad at her won't help.
"OK, I won't make any trouble," I say, "Just give me a really clever, off-the-wall creative excuse - the wildest thing you can think of. Make me laugh and I'll go away."
Miss Saucer-eyes is mute. This situation was not covered in training school last week. She whispers: "I'll speak to my manager."
Not a player.

Miss Saucer-eyes retreats to the back of the shop and consults with her manager, a high-energy, sharply-dressed woman. The manager marches briskly up to the counter, gives me a steely look, leans over the counter, and explains: "Sir, you may not know this, but this store has been a front for the Irish Republican Army for years. We're supposed to be turning in our firearms, and it seems a bazooka is missing from the inventory. When we find the bazooka, things will get back to normal. If I were you, I wouldn't make any trouble - just come back tomorrow, OK?”
A player.

Example: A garbage man with monster truck. Cold. Rain. As I pass by, he says, "You look prosperous." "Thank you. I feel prosperous." "You look like the kind of guy who might have some frequent-flyer miles." "As a matter of fact, I do. Lots of them." "Listen, I need enough to get me to Buenos Aires, one way." "I've got enough. They're yours. But what's in it for me.?" "Here's the keys to this garbage truck. Even trade.”
Yes! I've long had an urge to drive one of those things. I'd like to dump a whole load of garbage on a certain person's front porch. "It's a deal." "You got a license to drive a truck?" "Well, no." "Deals off - I can't be part of anything illegal, but no problem. Get a license. I'm here every Monday.”
A player.

Example: Early morning. Lady standing at a bus stop. All seven people waiting with her have wires coming out of their ears. Radios, I-pods, Walkmans, or something. All seven are in a zone - nodding heads in time to music or staring off into space. As I pass, I say to the lady: "They're all alien robots, you know. Their souls have been sucked out of them." The lady gives me a hard look and moves closer to the curb.
Not a player.

A man who has just walked up says, "Yes, but they aren't useless. They're a street-theater company and I'm their manager. We're on our way to a gig downtown." "Really? What's the name of the performance?" "Bus Stop Stupor. Look for us everywhere.”
A player.

Example: Clerk in a bookstore - older lady with dyed red hair. "Can I help you?" she asks. "Happy birthday," I say. (Makes people smile - sometimes you're early, sometimes late, but sometimes right on.) "Well, I hope you're coming to my party,"she says. "We need someone to jump out of a cake."
"I'm your man." "You'd be expected to go-go dance in the nude.”
"I'm not your man." "My mistake. Thought you looked a little kinky.”
A player.

The lady waiting in line behind me - who overheard this conversation - drifted away from the counter and then walked out the door.
Not a player.

Later, as I walked by a sidewalk table at a nearby coffeehouse, I spot the lady customer who fled the store. "Sorry, hope we didn't annoy you," I said.
She smiled. "Oh, no,"she said, "It's just that I jumped out of the cake last year. It hurts my feelings to think they're looking for a replacement.”
A player after all.

People in the real world are more full of mischief than I could ever invent. Most are primed and ready to play. While I didn't make up these stories, I had to make some of them down - they were unprintably creative.

Look for players. They're everywhere. You may be one.

The link to the site and this article is here: Thanks Robert.

This got me thinking....I am a player. I do this already. Anyone that knows me knows that I have little problem making off the wall comments to anyone and everyone,..but I prefer total strangers. I have met many people this way,..some are still friends today,...but I don't think that beyond that basic premise, I ever recognized the value or even thought of having a scorecard to make it fun....so today,..since I have decided I AM A PLAYER....I am going to find out who else is, as I go about my daily business.....If anything funny comes of it,..it will be posted here and probably commented on at Robert's page....especially if I get hit with mace or slapped.....as soon as I can type again....I will let you know....
D

Just Say Hi

2006-02-13T23:34:00.000-05:00

Okay there is one thing I have learned but practiced little.....and this may surprise those that know me.....but I am somehwat shy. When it comes to saying hi to a total stranger, I rarely perform...without alcohol that is.......but I am committing to saying "hi" to every girl I meet or run into or pass for the next month. I will tell you here what I say and what is said and if aything becomes of it...
What do I mean??? Well I am going to try to talk to every single woman that I think is attractive. I mean all of them......no matter where,..no matter who.....I will do the average recon of looking for a ring or kids in tow,..but beyond that? Well not much! I will do all I can to provoke a conversation...this is the part that few undestand.....I quit doing it because of the results...but lets record them here......I will setup each situation, what is said and what happens.......

Happy V Day

2006-02-13T22:16:00.000-05:00

To those in love and to those seeking it......happy V-Day........it's better than happy VD Day which is much more obscure and definitely more annoying......

As far as being single goes......well I can tell you being single on V-Day is certainly cheaper,...but gettin that lovin V-night (if you got game and your girl can tolerate you).......I do miss that.....err yeah I have been there before.....

Okay so back to the Game of dating. I called "RN" this is the "Eharm/Match girl" She has pretty much blown me off since Friday night. I made my efforts and I won't try again....

See this is what I am talking about....dating sucks......what happened to the day that you dated or met someone and if someone else came along you did what you had to do....She was callng me while seeing someone else....did he know? At least this time I did,..but does that change anything? Not really. If she will do this to someone else...keeping me in the wings,..then she would do it to me.....that's for sure....

I have been here before, this is just the way women today are....I am sure the committee will disagree to some extent,.but I am showing you....these are the facts..... Luckily I know this and plan accordingly....

soooooooo here I go off to it..... The beauty of Valentine's day is that alot of relationships end tonight....I had one end tonight as well so I am speaking from experience as well. Tomorrow and in the next few weeks the Matches should get better....I will be there.

To Recap: Love and Chocolate for V'Day

2006-02-12T20:56:00.000-05:00

Click here.

Prospects?

2006-02-12T19:54:00.000-05:00

Okay,... so........ here is the run down going forward.....There are two girls I like, but both are my Jr. by more than 10 years. I could easily get a date with either of them,....but I think the real question is do I want to. I mean at some point infatuation is greater than the ability to have something in common with these girls. Looking at the long term....there probably isn't a future with either of them,..in the same regard those are the relationships that work out in some cases......I doubt that to be true here...but either way I will keep my options open.

I finally hooked up with Eharm/Match girl.......but I think I shot myself in the foot this weekend.....with her. You can go back and read about her by clicking here.
We get along pretty good on the phone and are supposed to meet this week,..but I am second in line...I finally got her attention at the same time so other dildo did....this leaves me as the "last man out". This is tought o over come,...but the fact that she is talking to me means two things....1) I could be the one she is doing this too 2) that he isn't doing so hot.
With that said, I think we were supposed to meet Friday night and some bad communication prevented that. I didn't understand what she meant,....she didn't understand what I meant....I did however know that she was going on a "day date" with the other dude Saturday.....Last time I talked to her was Friday night...she was kindof pissy,...so I assume that she blames me......I left her a message on Saturday and as of Sunday still have not heard from her.....it could mean anything,...but it may mean ol' boy got in good this weekend and I am out.....it may mean that she was (is) trying to prove a point.....WOMEN! So I will leave her another message tomorrow....if she calls me back then we will go from there,...if not.....then she gets relegated to the recycle bin...
The next offer ont he table is one via comittee member. She has a friend she would like me to meet and has guaranteed that she would not set me up with a "beast"...We shall see.....I think I will take her up on it,...a lunch date was suggested,.....and just see.....you never know. This comittee member speaks very highly of this person....so perhaps she knows......however,...she has also put me on a blind date before.....that went over like the Hindenburg.....in flames and people died.....okay maybe not,..but it sure felt that way!
Other than those......that's about it....I do have some new things I am going ot try during the up coming week and we will see if they are fruitful......

About Valentine's Day

2006-02-12T19:43:00.000-05:00

The History of Valentine's Day
Every February, across the country, candy, flowers, and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St. Valentine. But who is this mysterious saint and why do we celebrate this holiday? The history of Valentine's Day -- and its patron saint -- is shrouded in mystery. But we do know that February has long been a month of romance. St. Valentine's Day, as we know it today, contains vestiges of both Christian and ancient Roman tradition. So, who was Saint Valentine and how did he become associated with this ancient rite? Today, the Catholic Church recognizes at least three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus, all of whom were martyred.

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men -- his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons where they were often beaten and tortured.

According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl -- who may have been his jailor's daughter -- who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed 'From your Valentine,' an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic, and, most importantly, romantic figure. It's no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France.

While some believe that Valentine's Day is celebrated in the middle of February to commemorate the anniversary of Valentine's death or burial -- which probably occurred around 270 A.D -- others claim that the Christian church may have decided to celebrate Valentine's feast day in the middle of February in an effort to 'christianize' celebrations of the pagan Lupercalia festival. In ancient Rome, February was the official beginning of spring and was considered a time for purification. Houses were ritually cleansed by sweeping them out and then sprinkling salt and a type of wheat called spelt throughout their interiors. Lupercalia, which began at the ides of February, February 15, was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus.

To begin the festival, members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would gather at the sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were believed to have been cared for by a she-wolf or lupa. The priests would then sacrifice a goat, for fertility, and a dog, for purification.

The boys then sliced the goat's hide into strips, dipped them in the sacrificial blood and took to the streets, gently slapping both women and fields of crops with the goathide strips. Far from being fearful, Roman women welcomed being touched with the hides because it was believed the strips would make them more fertile in the coming year. Later in the day, according to legend, all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn. The city's bachelors would then each choose a name out of the urn and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These matches often ended in marriage. Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day around 498 A.D. The Roman 'lottery' system for romantic pairing was deemed un-Christian and outlawed. Later, during the Middle Ages, it was commonly believed in France and England that February 14 was the beginning of birds' mating season, which added to the idea that the middle of February -- Valentine's Day -- should be a day for romance. The oldest known valentine still in existence today was a poem written by Charles, Duke of Orleans to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt. The greeting, which was written in 1415, is part of the manuscript collection of the British Library in London, England. Several years later, it is believed that King Henry V hired a writer named John Lydgate to compose a valentine note to Catherine of Valois.
n Great Britain, Valentine's Day began to be popularly celebrated around the seventeenth century. By the middle of the eighteenth century, it was common for friends and lovers in all social classes to exchange small tokens of affection or handwritten notes. By the end of the century, printed cards began to replace written letters due to improvements in printing technology. Ready-made cards were an easy way for people to express their emotions in a time when direct expression of one's feelings was discouraged. Cheaper postage rates also contributed to an increase in the popularity of sending Valentine's Day greetings. Americans probably began exchanging hand-made valentines in the early 1700s. In the 1840s, Esther A. Howland began to sell the first mass-produced valentines in America.

According to the Greeting Card Association, an estimated one billion valentine cards are sent each year, making Valentine's Day the second largest card-sending holiday of the year. (An estimated 2.6 billion cards are sent for Christmas.)

Approximately 85 percent of all valentines are purchased by women. In addition to the United States, Valentine's Day is celebrated in Canada, Mexico, the United Kingdom, France, and Australia.

Valentine greetings were popular as far back as the Middle Ages (written Valentine's didn't begin to appear until after 1400), and the oldest known Valentine card is on display at the British Museum. The first commercial Valentine's Day greeting cards produced in the U.S. were created in the 1840s by Esther A. Howland. Howland, known as the Mother of the Valentine, made elaborate creations with real lace, ribbons and colorful pictures known as "scrap".

Special thanks to American Greetings.

To Match or not to Match?

2006-02-12T19:04:00.000-05:00

I am trying to decide whether to get back on Match or not......
Several things come to mind in thinking about this.
First the positive:

Dating:24 hour exposure online....you never know when you might meet someone who doesn't work "normal" hours ( a nurse for instance).
Not a bar skank,..errr well didn't meet her in a bar anyway.
Usually smarter than the average I would meet in a bar.
If they re on Match,..they are serious, to a degree, about finding someone.
You know!...Well assume they are single.
You get to shop girls (and they you).
Shy people are more likely to actually talk with someone online.
You can "pre-screen" for likes and dislikes.
I have had success.....and not...just like meeting someone anywhere.
You meet people who wouldn't normally be in your social circle.
You can meet people that are tired of going out and have no reason to run into each other otherwise.
You can use your charm or humor playing relative to their profile (things they said) vs. meeting them "cold" in a bar or wherever.
You already know something about them when you meet.
You can judge a degree of compatibility.
You might get to meet someone who simply soesn't have the time to go out and meet someone.

Then there are the negatives:

You lose the eye and accidental contact..a smile, a wink, a little flirting.
You can be shopped as well as shop.
Women and I assume men, may rule out someone based solely on their picture, but otherwise would be fine together....
The one night stand is gone (then again that might be positive,..but at least it can still happen to you outside of your Matches)
Things you write, imply, or email..can be grossly misinterpreted because you lack inference and tone of voice via email.....doesn't bode well for those of us with a hint of sarcasm in most we say...
There might be a reason a hot girl has to go online instead of showing up anywhere, anytime....to meet a man.
It has come to my attention with girls from Match I have dated, that they absolutely get bombarded by emails and offers.....from dudes...I mean full inboxes.....the inverse is NOT true. Is there really a difference between this and a bar?
Your profile can absolutely do you in........
Meeting multiple women can be expensive,.....three women,..three first dates,....easily $180 if you like them and you are trying to see if you get along. AND this can happen all in one week.

There are many things positive and negative about on-line dating. I can say I have met better a quality of woman than I have met otherwise....but in the same breath it hasn't worked out thus far,..and some of them were flat out crazy...."That Girl" for instance!
Would this have been different if we had met in a different way? Probably not. I can honestly say that I have met more women this way than I have met on my own,..especially at this age and with the amount of time I have available. Comments are appreciated............

What Happened?

2006-02-12T17:34:00.000-05:00

Well, it goes like this....
Sometimes you have to follow your instincts.....if something isn't right in your gut,....then its probably not right in reality. When you get these feelings, they can be easy to ignore......they can also be persistent. With Paula, they were very persistent. Nothing really happened, and there was nothing I could say caused the break-up, but things were not right from the git-go......I just avoided those instincts.
If I were to put it in a nutshell I would say this was the oddest of relationships I have ever been in. It was kind of like dating a married woman,...and yes I have done this more than once in my past. The only difference I can find between that and what I had going on was that usually in an "affair" type situation, usually sex is high on the priority list for both parties....and that certainly wasn't the case in this relationship. In fact, it was virtually non-existent after a certain point.
Paula and I had many things in common. We got along great in person. Conversation was easy and often times we found ourselves laughing uncontrollably. Again though, something wasn't right and to this moment I can't put my finger on it.....There were just things not right. Bottom line is that I have nothing bad to say about Paula. If I was to say what I felt was wrong with the whole thing, it would be simply that she was going to either adopt (she stated that she thought about that for this year if she didn't meet someone) or have a child....I was the alternative to adoption. She did a full background check on me when we started dating, and when I demanded a sort of birth control (any sort) we stopped having sex. In the same breath I can say that there was definitely something there for us,....but her priorities were different than mine. I have been a round for a while and I understand the in's and out's of a woman who wants a baby. If I was to say there was an underlying factor,..then I would say that that was it.
I want a child,..but I do not want it that way. I don't want one for the sake of having a child and then hope I can stay with the mother.....Some women find a good man and decide "well at least I know this person is good enough to have a child with,...even if we don't work out"......to me that is the wrong priority. There were other problems and other things that made me feel uneasy,..but this was the thing that I noticed more than once, twice, or even three times.....in fact during one of our first trists...the comment came from her..."Think boy!......Think boy!" and she wasn't talking about me,..but to me......that was when the gut instinct started and from there it was pretty much downhill..........
I really liked Paula,..but there were things that just didn't add up.....her priority was definitely not me.....once it was noticed,....I think we both acted on it. Had this been 5, maybe 10 years ago,....I think we would have had a good relationship if not marriage. But now? Well, I think at least one of us realized that it just wasn't going ot work......that someone was me....You do what you have to do sometimes,..and I have to go back to drawing board......

A New Match???

2006-02-10T11:10:00.000-05:00

Instead of Dr. Phil you get Dr. Ali.....
Sexy Single Suicide Bomber seeks Little Baby bomb maker,...for strolls along the Mosque walls and canings........
I think I'll stick with the Good Ol American Girls.......

Back on the Horse!!!!

2006-02-10T10:50:00.000-05:00

Okay well it has been a while since I posted. I think its only fair that I keep the details of whatever relationship I am in at the time off the blog,.......but with that said,...once its over....the gloves are off.......well since I am posting today and all this weekend we can assume I fell of the horse....stupid horse.....

So, effective immediately I am back at it again.....I should be able to catch up this weekend as well as fill the blog with more crap than a Clinton at a podium. Hmmm bet he still gets more poontang than me.... Hillary too!!!

Beauty, Grace, and The Ex Pt II

2005-11-22T13:33:00.000-05:00

So what was it???? She sounded very somber on the phone.....like she had something to tell me. She sounded sad. I immediately went into concern mode,..but was it concern for her, or what she was going to say. i drummed up all of the courage I have to aske her what was wrong....still she wouldn't give me an answer.....just the typical "nothing, really". Crap!! Men you know what that means.....Nothing=Everything!
I headed to my apartment still trying to get her to tell me what was wrong,..but she would not budge,..simply saying that she needed to talk to me.....(hmmmmm you mean hear my voice or need to tell me something). Finally when I got inside,....she let loose. She said she felt like I left in a hurry, and thought that maybe I left to meet up with the ex....or maybe someone else.... It didn't take long for me to stifle this worry....I simply was sleepy, she lives a good click away, and I didn't want us to go straight into getting it on....I really do like her....
So we continued to talk for the next 2 hours....and she understood that there was nothing to my departure other than that.

Beauty, Grace, and The Ex Pt I

2005-11-18T09:31:00.000-05:00

It has been a while since I posted,......work is killing me. Today is Friday and since it has already been a 70 hour week, I thought I might make some time to catch up this morning. I have several posts in the works, but a primer on what's going on now is due.
Well Nascar has been promoted to girlfriend status.....and now she has a name, Paula!!!! Wow, what a girl. Perhaps I have hit the motherlode. She is calm, sweet, beautiful, nice, and not even remotely close to psycho. She is gentle, and can be mean when she gets fired up (not to me of course), but she is a like a mother bear when the cubs are in danger.....she is fearless. Best of all, she gives me a run for my money. She is not afraid to challenge me on something I say, nor is she opposed to teasing me and does so at will. I think I like it.....
So a little catching up and then more about her....
The last real post regarding her was the Rodeo....and it has been great ever since. Last weekend was our first real time together, alone and in private. We were supposed to go to the fair last Friday night,...but she was not feeling well all day at work. Once I got ready and was heading her direction, I called her and she was much worse than earlier. We put it off the date. The best part was that I did not feel she was BSing me. I knew she was going to be home and I knew she was not just backing out. This has been an issue in dating. Women frequently change their minds and I often get stiffed on the first date...STOOD UP I SAY, STOOD UP! This was not the case.
We agreed to get together the next night. I went back home and decided maybe it was a good time for me to relax as well, cook some dinner, hang out in the apartment and just enjoy not having ThatGirl wearing my ass out, or keeping me up all night. This was the first quiet night for me in 6 months.....However, Paula and I ended up talking for almost 3 hours on the phone.....just learning about each other, our histories, our futures and so forth...it was very nice and the conversation was very sincere about all things discussed. Lots of laughs too......
The next night we agreed that we didn't want to do anything and she invited me to her house, about 25 miles away in a sleepy little town of Yulee (known as Po-dunk) by us city boys (hehehehehehehe). I offered to cook her dinner. When I showed up I was amazed at how squared away this woman was. Her house was very nice, she has two very nice cars, two great dogs, and a good bit of land.....She answered the door and took my breath away, she was looking,...well,...ummmm..... HOT! I gave her a light peck on the lips and we proceeded to the Kitchen. We made a couple of drinks and I began to prepare dinner. The whole time she was there chopping and cutting and stirring right with me...it was all very natural.....all very easy going. Finally, I pinned her against the sink and planted one on her....not a sissy kiss,...more like a Fireworks and Rockets Red Glare kiss!!! YEEEHAAAAAA
We turned on some music and just enjoyed talking while dinner was cooking....we ate dinner and laughed all the way through it. We cleaned up together and it was like well oiled machine,...everything was in sinc and like we had done it a million times before together. We never missed a beat in the conversation. I think we both felt incredibly comfortable.....after dishes, we put on some music, Marvin Gaye's Greatest Hits, a little R&B old school, and we eneded up dancing to the entire CD. More smoooooooching and bunches of laughs. It was then that I realized that she completely trusted me, enjoyed my company immensly, and we were very natural together.
About 11:30 we sat on the sofa to watch a little TV, but I was getting very sleepy. By 12:00 I needed to go home,..since I didn't want to stay (even though it was certainly something I could have done). I felt like it was better to just get a few dates and hang outs behind us, so that we both were comfortable moving forward....I left. As soon as I pulled into my apartment complex,....my phone rings.....I have gotten these calls before and feared the worst. Maybe a back out for the next date or something. It was Paula,...when I answered the phone she sounded very somber, as if she needed to tell me something. I asked if she was alright and she said "No". It was then that I feared the rest of the phone call.....I had been waiting for a bombshell, it has happened so many times before.....
Was she married and had not told me (yep that's happened before)
Did she have kids? (Yep that too)
Did we not have the Chemistry I thought we had??? (See Go Carts, Mini-Golf and Body Language post).
What could it be,..I was already expecting the worst.......

Chemical Love and Chocolate

2005-11-11T11:14:00.000-05:00

Yeah, I figured that would get your attention......With this blog I not only try to be funny and entertaining,...often times at my own expense,...but I also like to be somewhat informative and thus todays lesson in Love is all about PEA!!! Yesterday, there was some comments posted about to the most recent post, regarding Chemistry and the chemistry of love, and lo and behold we actually have a topic. Thus I thought, what better way to address this then with well ummm chemistry.
Now Ms. Riggins, my Chemistry teacher in highschool, had little more chemistry experience than THC, but she was after all a government school teacher. She couldn't complete an intelligent sentence and frequently mispronounced even the simplest of words and always used double negatives,...so I must say I did not learn this from her. I did however learn a little bit about chemistry, all be it against my better judgement and will at the time.
So, back to PEA and no not those little green things you hid as a kid beneath a mound of mashed potatoes, or fed to the dog,...And no we aren't talking about Ruffies (the Date Rape Drug). We are however talking about Phenethylamine. Click here
Only click the above link if you have a Doctorate degree in Chemistry, otherwise you will nod right off....but I did want to prove that I am not BSing. I have been known to do that,....I mean I am a man and all,..its what we do best.....So back to the point....
This chemical PEA is a naturally occuring hormone. The brain produces it, and it can be found in both plant and animal,..but for our sake its all our brains fault.....What does it do??? And how does it have anything to do with love, you ask!!! WELLLLLLLLLL it technically has everything to do with how you feel. Do I claim to be a Chemist? Errr No,..but I will have plenty of links for you to draw your own conclusion.
Your brain can release many chemicals, such as, dopamine, norepinephrine, endorphins, enkephalin, phenethylamine & serotonin. These are all nature's natural narcotics - chemicals that encourage a sense of comfort, security, and create a mystical experience of oneness, basically euphoria, like when you are in love. Dopamine for instance is released by the brain, when you inhale on a cigarette and nicotine reaches the receptors it affects. The release of Dopamine give you the quick rush and feeling of relaxation that smokers get when they light up it is also a very powerful narcotic and makes it super hard to quit,...an addiction in and of itself,..why am I using this reference??? Well, it stands to reason that the brain uses certain senses it recieves smell, sound, sight, taste, feel to release various chemicals,..thus like and dislike of many things like pain, or all things for that matter.
When you see something you like,..like maybe another person the same is true. You go through an immediate recognization process as your brain says "Hey I know this person,...and damn she is hot". Some will theorize that Testosterone is responsible for this lust,...but I am looking at a bigger picture here. The brain recognizes this person as one of affection a positive feeling even overwhelming. It may recognize the touch of her hand or even spark a memory of being touched by this person...for whatever the reason the brain associates this person, this recognization with a positive feeling...perhaps overly positive....the brain then releases PEA,..which secures the feeling and often times this is LOVE....the chemical immediately spreads into the blood stream....You know that pit you get in your stomach when you see someone you love (not you married people, hehehehe)? Well that feeling is directly related to the release of PEA. The receptors in the stomach nerves are then stimulated....Now the effects are very short lived and the pit goes away,..but can come back as you experience more positive feelings based on the recognition.....that make sense??? Of course it does....basically, once the chemical is released it reinforces that recognition and that positive feeling...and thus the cycle....now there are many other chemicals released from the brain all the time and therer maybe some interaction between them,..but PEA is a stimulant and this is basically (very basically) what it does....Some might arguably call this release infatuation. The brain also releases Oxycontin,..this is love too,..but different love, shall we say "bonding": mom to son, father to daughter, comrade to comrade, husband to wife. The brain releases this pain killer when you experience this bonding type love, still love, but has a completely different effect and caused by a completely different chemical,..but still love none-the-less. Maybe this is why as a kid,..when you scrape your knee, just being with Mom makes it a little better....your doping up on Oxycontin.
Now there is one more thing to be covered here and that is Chocolate... get ready ladies.....guess what chemical is in chocolate???? Yep, PEA / LOVE!!! It is naturally occuring in the cocoa bean and thusly chocolate,....so when you want some chocolate,...you really want some love and some sugar,..both literally and figuratively....It also means that you are absolutely serious when you say "I Love Chocolate!!!", you probably actually do (Well why don't you marry it?)Men take note here.....If you want love and your girl likes chocolate,...give her a double dose,..clean yourself up,go buy some fine chocolates, and let her associate subconsciously you with PEA, LOVE, and Chocolate.....Win, win, and win, but I hope for your sake when you go for the trifecta like that,....you better be well rested,..because it may be hours before you get some.....rest that is......
All right the links,...just to prove I only made half of this up....and Yes, you can call me Dr. Dave from now on....
Click on any and all below, to see if Dr. Dave actually knows the Chemistry of Love!!! The last one was the best one.
WebMD 1
WebMD 2: GREAT ARTICLE
The Pathology of Love
The Chemistry of Love

Interesting turn of events......

2005-11-09T00:29:00.000-05:00

Okay first, Paula and I have been speaking via telephone evey night since the rodeo....she is very easy to speak to and vey sweet in nature...I like that....Also know that she will not tolerate any foolishiness (as per her profile). Definitely a southern girl and I definitely have much in common with her....we connect on a great deal of things, the only problem is,....ammmmmmmm I attracted to her????...Well yes in many senses,..but she did not make my heart leap out of my chest......now many of you will say "You're stupid" and I can take that, because yes I am......!!!

Whichleads me here:
Okay tonight,..I heard back from e-Harm and Match Girl click here to read...the girl I met on both.....I sent her a frank email about 5 days ago that was pretty basic..."There is a reason we met via E-harm and Match,..how about a drink???" Dave
That's it!!!! I have wanted to meet this girl for over a year now,...and we are both single...and we have been matched by the computer in India (joke) and by luck of the draw on Match.....
Here is her profile on Match:
I'm looking to make some friends but if things develop into something more that's okay too. I try to treat people the way I would want to be treated but I'm not a push-over either. I have a good career that I enjoy most days:) I enjoy eating out, happy hour, cooking at home, watching movies at home, weekend trips, sightseeing, and other stuff.

I'm looking for someone who wants to meet their bestfriend. Someone who enjoys bumming around the beach, biking and eating out. Well, anything can be fun if you are with the right person. I'd like a guy that can be laid back but ambitious enough to go out do things every once in awhile. someone that has a good attitude, willing to compromise and all the other things that make a guy wonderful:)

I like it,....for reasons too lengthy to explain here,..but when you have been on Match as long as I ,..you read a lot of profiles.....and this one is one of the more unassuming! I have already been matched with her on another site....so should I see if we match in person???
Her response to me was (after my email asking for a drink):
Wellllll, maybe. 555-6040. Let's talk first. Gina

Hmmmmmmmmmmm, at least she gave me her phone number.....I will call her tomorrow and see what happens but I am interested in your input..........all of you,..lurkers and all..

You can see the story a bout her by clicking here!
Yes she has herown post!!! She IS very pretty,too!!!

Now you see my dilemma,....dating is costing me $60-80 per first date and $40-60 after.....three dates a week is $400 bucks a month,..conservatively.......but I must say that prior to meeting Paula,..this girl was someone I REALLY wanted to meet. Personally, I say what do I have to lose!!! But Paula is a great girl,..even though I have only been out with her twice...maybe this is where I miss out.....
So give it up readers and lurkers.....let me know what you think,...I suspect you will say go see at least,..but what the hell do I know,..most of you are married and I'm not......so there's no telling.....

Addtional update I heard from Helga tonight. She is definitely German or foreign at the very least,..I want to meet her because of that....by itself,..but I have other fish to fry...I will keep in touch and see.....with her.

SOOOOOOO,.what I think about Gina???
We were matched on a site that is about matching,...they matched us....and of all the girls I have met have been 100% compatable and I enjoyed all of them and got along well with all of them well...read other posts to see what became.....
Secondly,...Gina hasn't been active on Match for two weeks,..you can see this,...to me it means she was dating someone that didn't work out..I could be rebound,.....I could be anything,..but I don't want to guess about it..... not fair to her or I if I am predisposed to an opinion!! I am attracted to her and have been since Eharm...I like her profile and what she wants in a date....moreover I think I am all that she is looking for (based on profile of two sites)

So what do you think???.....time is now to post...Committee, you will be getting an email to read this.....its a yes or no answer, but do give your responses.....if you havent figured out how to respond or comment,..email me instead and I will post it....

Let me know......and I will tell ya'll what happened on the phone call...... I will be calling her (I can bet I have to leave a message first,..trust me,..I have done this before,..you women are all the same.....in that regard)

As a side note,..I really want to meet this person...so I will probably try.....I have adte with Paula on Friday and that will tap all of the dating budget until middle of the following week.....So when you comment tell me what I ought to ask her to do too!
Dave

The Fighter In Me Cont....

2005-11-08T11:51:00.000-05:00

The next day, I decide to go back and hang out for happy hour since it was Friday and to apologize to the owners for the ruckus....When I got there, "D" was alreay there and so was his wife,...again?? Two days in a row?? She must have come back to keep him from getting his bald ass head slapped around...hehehehehehehehehe
Because I have known him for a while, 24 hours ought to be enough to settle it all down, I approached him,...before I could even get my hand out to shake his,..he had already begun apologizing and gave me a buddy hug,..kind of a half ass and manly like us guys do when we are making up over a fight hug,..this is not to be confused with the two men drunk giving each other hugs and noogies while saying "I love you , you little farker" and then proceeding to sing at the top of their lungs "IIIIIIIIIII Got Friiiiieeeeeeeeenddssss in low placessssssss, where the whiskey rounds and the beeer chases my bluuuuuuueeessss awayyyyyy and I'lllll be Okayyyyyyyyy""""
This was a let's not fight type of hug,..kind of like two boxers at the end of a tiring round...okay with me...so I bought him and his wife a round and proceeded to get my Friday on!!!! D and I joked back and forth about the parking lot for a few minutes and then in walked the hotty again.....alright!!!!,...if I hadn't made a big enough ass out of myself the day before,..I was going to get a second chance......she walked straight up to me after saying her hellos to the family and asked me to sit down with them,..she was buying the next round....I obliged this time,..since cool went way out the window the day before....IS THERE A FIRST DATE STORY HERE ANYWHERE????? Oh yeah........
I shall call hotty "Lori"
I sit next to Lori and we begin joking about the day before and just in general...Now I neglected to mention that "Youngin" was also at the bar the day before and again this day. It had been about a month since I tossed her alcoholic, needy, ass out of my apartment. Little did I know, the two of them knew each other.....but it did come up in conversation.....Lori and I talked about all kinds of things. We almost forgot there were other people at the table, but obnoxious "D" made sure we knew he was there....it was ll good. Lori and I share a b-day and that gave us a good chuckle....not that I believe in it,..but two Tauruses by all accounts should stay far far away from each other. I mean how many Bulls do you see on a farm of cows??? There is a reason for this......
After about an hour I ask her if she would like to go somehwere else the next night for a drink....she quickly replied "yes"....we setup for the next night.Dinner and rinks at The Ale House, I would pick her up and call her sometime during the day to confirm....
I called the enxt day and got voice mail.....I called again later in the day and again got voice mail.....Yippppeeee stood up!!!! That's just plain rude.....Finally about 2 hours prior to our meet time she called me back. I could tell she was hesitant and even having second thoughts.....being as experienced as I am at being stood up, I immediately addressed the issues. I told her look, just meet me there at 8:30 that way of you don't want to stay you can leave at will....At this point I usually want to tell them to pay for their own drinks and dinner too,..but I usually will wait until the check comes,..if we have a good time I picked it up,..if it sucks I ask them to anty up,..TO ME IT IS ONLY A DATE IF I PICK YOU UP AND DROP YOU OFF (unless circumstances require seperate transportation, like coming straight from work or something and I think this is fair....).
She agreed and so we met...She looked great, and we easily slipped back into good conversation ont he way inside and at the bar,.....ahhh mistake number one,....instead of waiting on a table like I should have, we took open bar stools. I didn't realize at the time that this would become an issue.....more like a whole subscription of issues......
We got our first couple of drinks down we went outside to smoke a cigarette...I don't normally smoke, but will if my company does.....so we hang out outside and continue laughing and making fun of people...She is receptive and open in posture,..touching me and leaning on me to warm up and so forth (it was alittle chilly this particular night). We go back in and order I womdigious (yeah my word) order of Chicken, chili, cheese, smothered and covered, nachos.....This plate must have weighed roughly 49 lbs., but I'm guessing.....;-))
We finish eating and have a couple of more drinks,..things seem to be going well until Quido walks in.....
Lori and I are sitting at the end of a long rectangular bar, to my left and at 90 degrees to us is a loud redneck who obviously makes more money than he can spend (but will try) and his former stripper girlfriend....they are nice,..but loud. I was actaully on the corner of the bar next to them, they on my left, Lori on my right, next to is one empty stool and then a single person and the other corner....so bascially four stools on the end three occupied. Back to Quido......
Quido (I don't know his name, but this is what he became named shortly after) is a bout mid to late 40's 5'10" 180 Lbs, Puerto Rican with slicked back hair and dark slacks white shoes and resembling John Travolta in Saturday Night fever,..it was Saturday night and all. He was still wearing his Ford Dealership shirt (CAR SALESMAN) and is designated via his name tag,...Used Car Sales Manager......got the picture??? He comes in loud and waiving to people in the bar with that greasy car salesman smile (kind of rembles many politicians acting like they know and like everyone in a romm, when in all actuality all they know is the money they are trying to swindle) , just as you would expect a Quido to do,..except I don' think he actually knew most of who he was waiving too,..I think it was from smelling too much exhaust all day....
He slides up in a greasy sort of way next to Lori. Now Lori is part hispanic and mostly Native American, Straight black hair, down to her butt, dark eyes, moderately dark complected,..beautiful.......high cheek bones, great full face smile......Well Quido introduces himself, interrupting our conversation,..but never introducing himself to me....so I introduced my self to him,..to let him know there was not to be a chance in hell of him worming in. He offered to buy her a drink and I spoke up and said that I would be handling all of her drinks for the night,...she turned back to me and we began talking again.....a few minutes goes by and Quido,..fires his second volley, this time with me staring his ass down, letting him know that my balls were WAY bigger than his and he was pushing his luck.....he was trying to Cockblock me.....She turns to him to see what he wants (she is a very nice person and I was not at all expecting her to tell him to shut-up and fark off),....but I was wishing she would, and since it was our first real meeting who was I to expect it....She turned to him and just stared,..he said "hey you look hispanic" (Playing the race card,..now I wanted to full on Donkey punch him right int he forehead)....She said that she was partly, but mostly Native American,..and turned back to me.....he tapped her again and again she turned and just stared at him,...he commented on her beauty and now it was time for me to step in.....I said "Why yes she is very beautiful and in the middle of a conversation with me,.......if you would please excuse us" Now that was about all the class I could dig up,...but my ire had already been pushed to the limit of restraint.
He apologized profusely and raised his hands (like I am sure his sorry ass has had to do to more than one police officer in his life) and backed away from the bar,..moving on to pester someone else...The redneck next to me asked if I knew the guy and I said "No". The neck said "I think he sold me my truck,..he's a jackoff", but he didn't say it loud enough for Lori to hear....I agreed and proceeded with my conversation with Lori....sure enough here comes Quido again, he bellies up to the bar next to us again and this time makes a comment to me about something stupid and not worth responding to, but being who I am I give him a laugh, a chuckle, and a comment,..simply to show Lori I was a socialble guy and I didn't want to pound his head into the bar rail until he passed out.....now I know what you are thinking.....I thought you didn't fight!!!! I don't but some people do just need to have their asses slapped around,...and you know I am right!!! Fight or not these people make you want to...Quido was one.......
So I get back into conversation with Lori and Quido chimes in again,..this time I slip and say "Dude,..can you see we are talking here???, Can you see that neither of us has interest in anything you might say??? Can you see that I have been trying to be nice, while you pester me, offer to buy her a drink, and so on,..will you please for the love of God, go find someone else to bother......???" This was about as much class and restraint I could dig up....Quido replies with more "I'm sorry's" and just then he noticed redneck,...."HEYYYYYY DIDN"T I SELL YOU A TRUCK???"
Thank you God for not making me kill this asshole, thank you God for letting him be distracted and attracted away from me......and Lori,....Thank you God, see you in Church tomorrow......He and redneck get loud and boisterous. What I failed to realize was that now,....jackoff is directly to MY left,...at least he would be easier to punch now.....Umm I mean ignore.....Well the neck and he chat for a few and then the neck goes back to the stripper.....Quido backs away from the bar into my blind spot......Lori and I are sitting sideways at the bar facing each other enjoying a conversation,..when behind me I feel that "thing"...You know that "thing" when you can tell something is going on behind you even though it makes no sound and you can't see it?....I notice Lori glancing over my shoulder, then immediately back to me. He was trying to flag her down behind my back to get her attention (see I knew something was going on),..I give it a second and as soon as the nano second happen that I felt it again,...I turned quickly towards Quido....we are now about 5 feet apart. I give him the "I'm going to go ahead and kill you, now!!" look. I say as low as I can without being heard by Lori and only by him."If you don't move the fuck away from me now and leave me alone the rest of the night I am going to take your ass outside and beat the everlovin fuck out of you and stuff you in the trunk of your own car,..Got It!" He backs away and says "whoa man, its all good......" and moves to the other side of the bar so fast redneck pipes up...."What the hell did you say to him man,..heheheheheheeh that was funny,....He had a look like a deer in headlights,.....man what did you say??"
I am whispering "Shhhhhhh" to him and winking and turn back around to Lori,..who then asks me what I said.....Nothing "I just asked him to leave us alone and go home to his wife and kids!!" She asked if I tried to start a fight......I said "No, There in no Fighter in me anymore!"(but let his sorry ass comeback).
Maybe ten minutes go by and Quido has moved back into talking range with Redneck, now his back is to me and he is involved,..they are trying to scrape him off too,..but he is at least too busy talking to them to bother us....Lori excuses herself to go to the bathroom,...I stand up to see her off,...Now Quido isn't facing me,..but IS watching her walk to the bathroom.....he turns to the neck and sort of me,...and says "What a great peice of ass man,..man is she beautiful, I would love to tap that ass" He doesn't think I hear him and the comment happens after she has been gone a minute or two....I was really torn between punching him in the mouth and totally showing my ass....but I din't! After the events of the day before I don't want to have Lori think I have anger issues.....The neck didn't hear what Quido said,..because his stripper had said something to him.
Quido was back standing near me when he said this....I turned to him and told him "Watch your fucking mouth, she has more class than you have ever seen and now its time for you to leave....do it now, or I am going to punch you,..you have 10 seconds to get out of the door muther fucker go! Go now!....do it!" Neck and stripper were back involved in their conversation and did not hear his comment fully or mine,....just as Lori walks out,..he heads out the door,..I pretend like I am not watching him leave quickly......Lori sits down and we order one more drink......
Just then Neck sees the door swing wide and Quido's elbows and asshole smoking out the door.....I turn to Lori and Neck Chimes in loudly......"Wooooooo Hoooooo what did you say to him man,..he took off like his ass was on fire.....Woooo boy,....you must have told him off, man I ain't never seen him move that fast even when I was buying my truck in cash"
I just chuckled and turned back to Lori,..who again asked if I ran him off,...I tried to say "No" and leave it at that,..but Neck chimed in again........"Man Dude, Wha'd you say.....HEHEHEHEHEHEHE man he was hauling ass" Just then Lori pipes up and say "Yeah,...what did you say??" So I told both of them,..that he made a comment about her virtue and what he'd like to do and I asked him to leave quickly"" Neck says " I thought I heard him say that,..but man what did you say,..that boy was skeered!!!"
Lori was not impressed that I was defending her honor at all,..the next thing out of her mouth was "I am ready to go"......I paid up and we headed to the door....I walked her to her car and apologized and told her exactly what he said......
Lori got into her car and says "Well we have known each other three days, on the first day you tried to beat up my step-dad,...then on our first date,..you try to get into a fight at a bar,..I don't think this will work....but thanks for dinner....." I tried to explain,..but there was no use........I even called her the next day,..that was when she told me that she and Youngin had also talked about it and Youngin said I was an asshole. Lori then at least gave very little credit toYoungins statement saying that I was far from an asshole to her (Lori), but the fighting thing would be an issue,....then she said "get some anger management classes or something and maybe we can talk again,..but for now,....I am not interested!"
Geeeeees can't a brother get a break?????
I kept her number in my phone......just in case I ran into her again or wanted to call her months down the road and ask her out for a drink....ThatGirl called her number on the night she called everyone else in my phonebook and asked how she knew me and so forth and was basically being a bitch.......I just deleted the phone number after that,...there was no need even calling to apologize,....she thinks I have anger issues and now knows that I have an angry psycho ex......lucky me!!! Ever onward!!!!! Did I mention dating Sux???? There is apparently still a fighter in me.....!
Dave

First Date Nightmares Pt II:The Fighter in Me

2005-11-07T22:37:00.000-05:00

Now, my days of bar brawls are long long over,....two teeth and several scars OVER...Now I am not opposed to showing my ass once in a while,..fire water will do that to you sometimes. It has happened since that first cave man ate a fermented fruit and ruined the hunting party by scaring off the Tricerotops by hooping and hollering and got knocked out by the Chief caveman (yeah I made all of that up),..but usually its just posturing and nothing comes of it....This is also one of the reason I stick with a few select places to hang out....I know everyone and usually the owner or the manager....The fastest way to end a fight is to get the other guy thrown out..HEHEHEHE!
So, as I have said previously I have one bar that I prefer over all the rest. I know the owners and its a BAR bar,..bar flies and daily regulars. One of the regulars is a short older guy,..straight from Brooklyn or some other Yankee place....Forgeddaboutit!!! He's pretty funny and I've known him for a few years. Not BBQing at his house "know",..but definitely see him weekly or more. He always mentioned his beautiful wife and has made a comment to me several times about keeping his step daughter away from me....(jokingly I suspect,...but I digress). Most of us tease him about his wife being a fantasy, since none of us have ever seen her....but his buddy and a very good friend of mine has attested to the fact,..but teasing him is still fun...He's about 5'6" and weighs all of about 150 lbs. He is always wearing a redneck hat (I guess trying to fit in) and has hair to his shoulders.
Well one evening I walk into the bar and grab my typical stool next to Big Dale...I start on my second beer and first shot with Big Dale when in walks "D" ( the fella I described above). He sits at a table. We exchange "Hi's" and a couple of insults and so forth. I spin back around to face the bar and proceed to cut up with Big Dale. "D's" table is right directly behind my stool....its a Thursday night (why is this important?? Well you'll have to keep reading). A few minutes later in walks a very attarctive womand and a even more attractive younger lady. They go over and sit with D. Well spank me and call me Francis,..he does have a wife who is pretty and his step-daughter (apparently) is hotter than a rock at high noon in Texas....I mean SMOKIN~!
They are all sitting right behind me and of course being Dave I introduce myself. D is getting pretty lit up and has been drinking for most of the day, but is still in control of his faculties.....thus far....I joke around with them and him inparticular. Finally, hotty walks up to the bar to order a round of drinks and parks it beside me to order...WE joke lightly and I ask her name again....I had temporarily gone deaf during the introductions,...more like I was planning my strategy....
We chat for a minute and she invites me to sit down,..but I was halfway into a conversation with Big Dale, so I declined,..besides it made me look cool. Well a few more beers go down and another shot courtesy of Big Dale trying to make his drinking problem mine......
During this time, "D" has proceeded to get totally annihilated and was getting louder by the second...next thing I know I'm getting insults and hot slag tossed in my direction....usually this wouldn't bother me from him,..but he was more than showing his ass....I toss a couple back in his direction....now not to be too arrogant,..but once I start I will usually end the insults thing pretty quickly with a real stinger or two that leaves everyones mouth agape....(gees,.I can't believe he just said that...Bahahahahahahabwbhahahahahahahahahahah "D" he just called you a.....Man that was funny!!!..... sort of ending) This is usually where I have to get someone thrown out, or make it to the door in a hurry....
I finished my beer and was standing up to leave,..when "D" decided to throw one more good one my direction slurred words and all.....I walked over and said "Hey man, whats up,..why are you busting my chops so hard today"?? Then he proceeded with more....Well he was wearing a Nascar Jeff Gordon hat with flames on it......I smacked the bill of his hat and said "Hat's on fire! Oh its out!!!" and off it comes. This got a good laugh from everyone except his wife and step-daughter. Why you ask?? Well it revealed a a shiny bald head concealed by long hair in the back and the hat....obviously his wife and step-daughter knew what no one else did......CHROME DOME!!!! Man was he pissed,.....I had never, nor did anyone else see him without a hat before....Ummm Game Over....Now whats worse than a short guy with Napolean complex??? A short, drunk, bald guy with Napolean complex!!
His step-daughter and wife are busy burying their faces in their hands and I hear the whistle from The Good, The Bad, And the Ugly (whistle) WAAA WAAA WAAAAAAA (whistle) WA WAA WAAAAAAAAAAAA......Up he comes (umm about to my chest) and there goes his mouth,....you MutherFarker,...blah blah blah.....well I had enough too and it looked like it was getting ready to get nasty.....I try to walk off, he grabs my arm....Game On!!!! I tell him to take it out side if he wants a peice of me.....and out the door the entire bar goes.....Our mutual buddy is telling him to quit being a dick and his wife is in my face begging me not to kill him.....we were both bowed up.....After a minute or two...I tell him to fark off and walk to my truck and he is running his mouth the whole time....Our mutual freind is now about to be in a fight with him....

Too be continued!!!!

Communication Breakdown

2005-11-07T15:09:00.000-05:00

Saturday night I went to the watering hole to get a drink and watch the Florida vs. Vanderbilt game. It started as a quiet evening, but quickly I began to stress out on the game and the bar began to fill up with regulars and some newbies. I intended to hang out for the game,...call NASCAR once during the game, and come home when my buzz got good enough or my wallet empty enough....turned out to be around 1:00 when the two indicators collided.
There was a couple of reasons I didn't call Nascar earlier in the evening. One was that she busy with a paper for school (one that she has now asked me to read and critique all 84 pages of) and two because ThatGirl taught me that I absolutely did not want someone that gets totally pissed off if we aren't in contact every three hours...(which is usually what ThatGirl did).
I thought that maybe I should test the waters with Nascar a little bit and just see. I called her about 8:30 p.m. and got her voice mail. I told her I was at a bar, watching the game, with friends,..I named two girls (one was a committee member who ultimately did not show and the other was a bartender I knew would be there). I am not playing games here, I simply want to find out some things about Nascar's character. I left her a nice message and told her again I had fun on Friday and that I hope her paper was going well. About 10:30 she left me a message,...but we were at 14 seconds to go in a tie ballgame and there was no way I was answering the phone....It could have been the President and he would have gotten my voice mail (umm not that the President would call me or anything,..but maybe he would have wanted to tell me that my blog was a national treasure or something). I was a bit concerned checking the message a couple of hours later, what if she failed the test.....another one down.....
What I got was a sweet message, no insecurities, no questions on who was who or when I would be home, nada, zilch. She said that I could have watched the game with her, but she probably wouldn't have gotten her paper done if I had.....
Sunday, one of Da Boys called to offer me a feee ticket to the Jaguars game. It was like 10:45 in the morning,...I hadn't actually spoken with Nascar,..since Saturday morning around 11:30. I left for the Game with "T" and was gonna give Nascar a call prior to going into the Stadium....About a half hour before that she called. Again very sweet, great demeanor, and no issues,...didn't even ask who all I was going to the game with. We had general chit-chat and talked about the paper she is doing,...she wanted some help researching something she was having problems finding info on (this was Saturday morning when she mentioned it first),..so I made a list of links (Saturday) to exactly what she was looking for and sent it to her before I went out Saturday night..She was commenting on the links (during Sunday's phone call)and how much they helped her and that she needed me to find some others as well....I told her I would when I got home...She wished me a good time and said she was looking forward to seeing me soon.....
Communication breakdown??? No not at all.....so far so good.....she passed the Communication Breakdown test with flying colors....ThatGirl would have rang my phone off the hook, gone on two dates, not spoken to me for a week, and just generaally been a bitch.....Ahhhhhh this is a nice refreshing change....now she will get regular calls.....
This morning she sent me her paper and I am in the process of reading it....damn writing a paper for a Master's degree is hard.....I can barely understand some of it,..but I ain't going to tell her that!!! I thought the Matrix was a movie,..not the internal external forces in chart/graph form affecting the strategy and marketability of a company, particularly a fortune 500 company relative to the market and its own competitors.....did that make sense???? Yeah well it didn't to me either,....but it was my first non-movie Matrix....I feel smarter already!!!

A couple of updates.....
I dropped Po-Po a line Saturday afternoon,...just kind of teasing her as to why I hadn't heard from her....no comment, no email, no nothing.... I guess I HAVE been relegated to the recycle bin....either that or I am under investigation...YIKES!
Helga: Not her real name,..but I think she is german,..so I will call her Helga until I meet her and find a more suitable name.....I emailed Helga, about a month ago and we went back and forth two times.....I noticed a few things that make me believe she is a German National or something of the like....one is bad spelling,...not atrocious (and hell anyone reading this knows I refuse to use spell check and spell like a fifth grader), but in a weird,..almost phonetic in spelling,..but she is very educated adn fluent in several at least two languages....plus I am seeing things in her comments that are shall we say losely translated,..like verb in the wrong spot,..or an incorrect adjective.....I asked her one time if she had an accent and she stopped emailing me.....MAYBE she is a Russian spy and the Po-Po is involved....? HMMMMM anway I thought this girl was cute,...Friday night when I got home from the Rodeo with Nascar, there was an email from Helga....the German....Sure enough she is a singer and sings in at least three languages and spends time in Germany....I emailed her back and have not gotten a return,..but who knows.....I will keep in contact until and if Nascar and I hit a level that makes her exclusive....I have made the mistake too many times in not leaving my options open,..so I will this time,...its all casual until I get goo and ready.....
Dave

Lurkers!!!!

2005-11-05T01:08:00.000-05:00

Quit Lurking,..start commenting......I want to laugh too!!! And the comments are whats funny to me....Thanks AK!! Dating I hardly find funny!!!! I think I need to take out a mortgage,..I have another date this week!!! Any body want to buy some old Sneakers and maybe a car stereo....
Dave

NASCAR and Bullriding

2005-11-05T00:15:00.000-05:00

Okay,..so tonight was technically the second date,....but still to me it was the first. Nascar and I went to the Rodeo.....as expected her nephew and neice went with us....that's good,..it kept the conversation light and the smooching to a minimum. As I stated here women like to see if a man can handle kids....Match allows you to see if they want them and them to see if you do. So I figure tonight was a little test. See how Dave handles and 8 year old boy (man I wish I was 8 again......you get to annoy people, get to be cute and get away with it,...and girls always think you're cute), and a 17 year old girl....attitude and all....
I can say that I passed with flying colors,..except for pissing off the 17 year old about me getting her "crushes" ticket to the rodeo,...umm since she caught him at the fair with another girl (man I don't miss those days,...17 sucked). Anyway,..back to Nascar....I met them in a parking lot north of town and we ride together from there. Now this is the second time I saw her and as soon as I stopped my truck,..she got out and hugged me,....big points....she was just as pretty as the night before....and I don't think you can call it cleavage,...I think its more like Cleavland.....WOW,...I'm a leg/butt man,..but gees,..I can be pursuaded....she looked great.
We went to the rodeo and she and I were doing fine....a couple of quick kisses and lots of touching and leaning on each other....conversation came easily and again the laughter did too.....She is very pretty, blonde hair, blue eyes, full lips,..did I mention Cleavland??? She has a very nice disposition.....she is very quick witted and just generally funny......We talked, I played with the 8 year old,..we talked some more,...8 year old won't leave me alone now,....we talked even more,..now the 8 year old is on my back......and Nascar and I just kept talking,...the 8 year old kept trying to prevent it......sorry kid.....I can keep you busy,.....impress her with my kid skills, and give a noogie all at the same time.....I have little brothers and nephews......
Over all a good time was had,....she wanted me to drive us back to my truck, which was fine....her hand was on my leg the whole way,...and we were holding hands with the other.....I do like her. Good education,...good values.....good looks,...lots of laughs and goofing off.....to me that's very important....
We kissed one good time at the rodeo,..while the kid was occupied with his sister (thankfully for a moment) and ol girl slipped me the tongue.......but the kid quickly ended that,.....you know what? KIDS ARE THE ABSOLUTE BEST BIRTH CONTROL!!!!
But there were a few more quick kisses here and there.....Okay maybe dating doesn't suck so bad......errrrr okay it does,..but you do the best with what you have.....smooching helps.....
We get back to my truck and I strategically park her Jeep, on th opposite side of my door,..hoping for the first GOOD kiss. It worked. WOW great kisser,..thats important........ThatGirl who?.........We kissed deep and long for a few minutes and it was very nice...I do enjoy her company,...ummm so far.....I do get easily annoyed,..but Nascar is very laid back, very educated,..and very well,....country....As I said she appears to be a great woman...now does that mean marrying material??? Well I obviously can't answer that,...but she definitely gets to the next stage,.....meeting friends and seeing how she reacts to the knuckleheads I hang out with,..not just Da Boys (Shrimp boy "T" especially), but how she responds to the openess and very off the wall conversation of Committee member "K' and family,...My sister and committee member "Kris". She passes those test and who knows,....but right now I enjoy her company. We talked about everything from careers to wants to family (future and present) and even a little sex.....She asked me some odd questions,..like what I am into,....I think she wanted to know more that I wasn't into things that she didn't like. But,.....she was very interested in what I do like, obviously the situation kept us from getting into detail,..but as a whole we are on the same page......Hell I have to keep some things private, right???
Okay, well now I am home,..Ican still smell her perfume on my hands and shirt....she smelled great,....and thats one of the very cool things about dating,..you get to go home and you can smell their perfume on you and it brings back memories of that night and them.....Smell is the strongest sense tied to memory period and if you enjoy reliving the evening,..its nice to be able to smell both the pheromones and perfume of a new date.....I WILL BE CALLING HER TOMORROW!!!
I did already send her an email tonight telling her that I had a great time and that I could still smell her perfume......Women like to know that they made a good choice in perfume as much as they like to think you are still thinking about them.....its not a game, its just women....I feel it and smell it and she would like to hear it.....so that's that....
Overall I give Date #2 with Nascar a 9 of 10.
Things I like about Nascar:

We like the same things thus far,..sports to food.
She is very laid back,...doesn't get worked up easy.
Great Kisser
Smells great
Southern Girl, light accent, educated,..but not conversationally uptight,...she'll use a double negative with the best of them.
Affectionate,....a toucher....I like that, to me it's part of pair bonding and makes you both unavailable to everyone else
Funny
Attractive
Sexy
Doesn't miss much as far as obscure jokes and references...
We are 33 days apart in b-day and year.
Doesn't drink much (she had 3 in 6 hours, I had oh,...maybe 6) and she doesn't care if I do.

Things I don't like

A little thick in the middle,..but hey aren't we all at 35
Lives 20 miles away (this has a good side too,..limiting drive-bys and Thatgirl type psychosis)

Great things??? Well I got home by midnight,....I was sober,...and could still smell her on me,...and I can't get her off my mind, thus the post tonight.
more tommorrow......
Dave