The Swingsteins
No they are not a Jewish rock band, and frankly they aren't even related by marriage or otherwise, but they are my friends and they swing. Swing you ask?? Isn't that something they did in the 70's? Well err yes! And apparently they still do it today. Now barring a few ummmm skeletons in my closet,..This is not my cup of tea, however....I find it interesting. King Swingstein is a friend of mine and a colleague (not of swinging, but professionally), he does this all the time. Now we have compared war stories and although I believe to have him beat in bed post notches,....it won't stay that way if he keeps tagging two at a time,.....virtually cutting my lead in half each time. But he is not the only one (well obviously it takes two to tango, but I am excluding his live in Queen Swingstein). KS and I are relatively new friends, but we have been colleagues for a couple of years, but until recently had not gotten very personal in our conversations.
At my watering hole is also a few Swingsteins, related? Doubtful,....but same same. One has attempted over and over to get me involved, we'll call her Pork Chop...she is relatively attractive MILF, and very funny an fun to hang out with. She and her Hubby swing pretty regular, mostly because he can't stop her from getting action on the side, and if you can't beat them join them.....PCS has been trying to get me in the rack for at least 3 months. And if I sit next to her at the bar I often get molested to some degree...I even get late night booty calls. I have declined....Last Friday a cute, augmented, slim, mid-thirties young lady slid up to the bar next to PCS and I. We'll call her Lean Swingstein. Her and PCS hit it off pretty quick. So much that I thought they knew each other prior, but after some discussion they did not. But they became rather friendly with each other and then of course me, attempting to lure me away from the bar to another dive. Had it not been for the hell week I had I work,..I would have at least entertained the idea of moving to another venue,..but I was quite content sipping my beer, followed with shots of cherry vodka and then heading home to grill a steak.
I got many phone calls that night from them begging me to come up and hang out with them. Come Monday I heard the story, almost sorry I missed it. And Lean was definitely the piece of work I thought her to be. But after things I have done in my life this lifestyle isn't for me, even if King Swingstein keeps trying to talk me into it. I think I have perhaps become more jealous as I have gotten older and wouldn't share too well. I certainly couldn't do this with someone I am involved with beyond booty calls now. It's not stage freight by any stretch I can be quite the exhibistionist and it definitely not anything else,...So I began to kind of dissect it. You know what I conclusion I came to? I am out seeking a wife,...not a lay and the worst part is that might be exactly my problem. Does that mean I am changing my ways? Naaaaaahhhhh, but if enough alcohol flows and the dry spell long enough who knows.
I do thinks its funny some of the stories KS tells me though, luckily when I was more errrrr, ummmm inclined to do these things, I can completely understand where he is coming from, and to say the least it is definitely less complicated.....than dating. But KS and I got into a conversation that he liked having the new adventures and so did Queen.....but my argument centered around my experience with women, and thus became the crux of my argument. I prefer to find someone moderately good at shagging, and then train them to please me and be trained to please them.....because it is then when sex comes across at 4 or 5 levels of the psyche that I find it fun. I understand both sides of the coin,....but there is not doubt after all these years and the shear number of women I have shagged that sex is the best with someone you have trained to be exactly what you want and it turn have been trained....but with that said I do miss the fun of just breaking anonymous furniture with strange to a degree...I guess both side have validity!
So unless I have a record breaking dry spell (doubtful) or too much drink (possible) I stick to the mission plan. I will live vicariously through King and Queen Swingstein,..and giggle at the sometimes drama that happens when you swing..........
At my watering hole is also a few Swingsteins, related? Doubtful,....but same same. One has attempted over and over to get me involved, we'll call her Pork Chop...she is relatively attractive MILF, and very funny an fun to hang out with. She and her Hubby swing pretty regular, mostly because he can't stop her from getting action on the side, and if you can't beat them join them.....PCS has been trying to get me in the rack for at least 3 months. And if I sit next to her at the bar I often get molested to some degree...I even get late night booty calls. I have declined....Last Friday a cute, augmented, slim, mid-thirties young lady slid up to the bar next to PCS and I. We'll call her Lean Swingstein. Her and PCS hit it off pretty quick. So much that I thought they knew each other prior, but after some discussion they did not. But they became rather friendly with each other and then of course me, attempting to lure me away from the bar to another dive. Had it not been for the hell week I had I work,..I would have at least entertained the idea of moving to another venue,..but I was quite content sipping my beer, followed with shots of cherry vodka and then heading home to grill a steak.
I got many phone calls that night from them begging me to come up and hang out with them. Come Monday I heard the story, almost sorry I missed it. And Lean was definitely the piece of work I thought her to be. But after things I have done in my life this lifestyle isn't for me, even if King Swingstein keeps trying to talk me into it. I think I have perhaps become more jealous as I have gotten older and wouldn't share too well. I certainly couldn't do this with someone I am involved with beyond booty calls now. It's not stage freight by any stretch I can be quite the exhibistionist and it definitely not anything else,...So I began to kind of dissect it. You know what I conclusion I came to? I am out seeking a wife,...not a lay and the worst part is that might be exactly my problem. Does that mean I am changing my ways? Naaaaaahhhhh, but if enough alcohol flows and the dry spell long enough who knows.
I do thinks its funny some of the stories KS tells me though, luckily when I was more errrrr, ummmm inclined to do these things, I can completely understand where he is coming from, and to say the least it is definitely less complicated.....than dating. But KS and I got into a conversation that he liked having the new adventures and so did Queen.....but my argument centered around my experience with women, and thus became the crux of my argument. I prefer to find someone moderately good at shagging, and then train them to please me and be trained to please them.....because it is then when sex comes across at 4 or 5 levels of the psyche that I find it fun. I understand both sides of the coin,....but there is not doubt after all these years and the shear number of women I have shagged that sex is the best with someone you have trained to be exactly what you want and it turn have been trained....but with that said I do miss the fun of just breaking anonymous furniture with strange to a degree...I guess both side have validity!
So unless I have a record breaking dry spell (doubtful) or too much drink (possible) I stick to the mission plan. I will live vicariously through King and Queen Swingstein,..and giggle at the sometimes drama that happens when you swing..........
posted by Redneck Dave at Thursday, May 18, 2006
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