Facts is Facts

Got this today in an email......Yeah,...very fitting for this Blog,....
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:

1. 40-ish.............................................49
2. Adventurous.......................Slept with everyone
3. Athletic......................................No tits
4. Average looking..........................Ugly
5. Beautiful...........................Pathological liar
6. Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
7. Emotionally Secure......................On medication
8. Feminist..........................................Fat
9. Free spirit....................................Junkie
10. Friendship first....................Former slut
11. Fun......................................Annoying
12. New-Age.................Body hair in the wrong places
13. Old-fashioned....................No BJ??
14. Open-minded......................Desperate
15. Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing
16. Passionate..................Sloppy drunk
17. Professional..........................Bitch
18. Voluptuous.........................Very Fat
19. Large frame....................Hugely Fat
20. Wants Soul mate.................Stalker
    

DICTIONARY OF WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

• Yes = No
• No = Yes
• Maybe = No
• We need = I want..
• I am sorry = you'll be sorry
• We need to talk = you are in trouble
• Sure, go ahead = you better not
• Do what you want = you will pay for this later.
• I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
• You're certainly attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?
  

DICTIONARY OF MEN'S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you.
11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

HEHEHEHEHEH,...that's some funny stuff.....and IT DEFINITELY OUGHT TO BE POSTED AS "RULES" ON MATCH.COM